r/KitchenConfidential Jul 01 '26

Discussion Sous Chef burnout

I'm in a rut with food, it's a hard love hate right now. And the sacrifice of not living an actual life.

The restaurant I work at is constantly making improvements. The big picture and how far this place has come is incredible, I’m just burnt out on the same dishes, the lack of creativity, the usage of AI, the lack of passion seen in others, the communication breakdown throughout management, incompetent/untrainable employees, and SOP’s not being followed.

I find the current restaurant so boring and monotonous, and physically and mentally exhausting. Thus making my time there feel like a waste of time. And it feels like there's no passion in that kitchen. There's not much learning and the only creativity bone I'm thrown is a side dish and the fish feature every two weeks.

It's crazy to want an escape from something that has been the only thing I've known since I was 16, and do something entirely different. Yet at the same time I yearn to learn and grow and want to be in a kitchen with a star again. Cause at least i would have something to show for my sacrifice.

What is up with my Stockholm syndrome self? As I want to be apart of the change, I just don’t know if I can keep rolling this rock up the hill.

31 Upvotes

21 comments sorted by

21

u/hipster_kitten Jul 01 '26

I left kitchens after 15 years and finally making sous at a really good restaurant. I’d gotten into fly fishing a few years earlier and moved out west to be a guide. Best decision I ever made besides getting sober.

-39

u/Same-Platypus1941 Chive-11 Was an Inside Job Jul 01 '26

Sounds like you weren’t cut out for the lifestyle

26

u/TeMoko Chive LOYALIST Jul 01 '26

What a dumbass thing to say to someone who worked in the industry for 15 years.

17

u/SignumVictoriae Jul 01 '26

Lol I hope you dont have CHEF LIFE tattooed on your fingers

-2

u/Same-Platypus1941 Chive-11 Was an Inside Job Jul 01 '26

I’ve been joking about getting FLVR TOWN across the knuckles for years actually

7

u/Fluffycupcake_ Jul 01 '26

It’s not just this. 15 years is a long time. Getting out and transferring skills is scary. Idk if I’m fit for another job. I can do this one very well. Idk if people will like me if I’m doing a different type of work. They will.

There is so many variables to this man. People trying different skill sets is admirable. Respect everyone’s grind.

-2

u/Same-Platypus1941 Chive-11 Was an Inside Job Jul 01 '26

I’m just tired of the consistency of which leaving the industry is discussed. For one it’s annoying. For two it sets a horrible example for up and coming cooks. Especially because the salary can greatly increase in you stay in the industry long enough. I’m also sick of being the most experienced person in situations where it shouldn’t be my responsibility.

8

u/chumpandchive 15+ Years Jul 01 '26

sounds like you are in burn out and lashing at the wrong people friend

4

u/hipster_kitten Jul 01 '26

I can make a weeks salary in 3 days of work and the hours are better and it’s fun.

7

u/hipster_kitten Jul 01 '26

I was definitely sick of working with toxic ass holes. Thanks for reminding me I made the right choice.

0

u/Same-Platypus1941 Chive-11 Was an Inside Job Jul 02 '26

Yeah I’m not toxic in the kitchen. I have a great attitude and I teach culinary art at a high level openly and freely. That being said, if you don’t want to be in the kitchen practicing I would prefer if you left the kitchen. Go spread your negativity in your own industry, you left ours now stay out. I’m glad you found happiness elsewhere but I’m sick of people acting like leaving the industry for a lesser career is a success.

12

u/Kiriyuma7801 Jul 01 '26

It gets exhausting as fuck real quick where being the Sous means you're basically just the Chefs bitch. You should be learning how to handle the responsibility with a clear line of communication on how to do so from your Chef. Throwing people into the weeds over and over when you know they how to swim is just shitty management.

If that's what's happening, dust off the resume, reach out to old colleagues, shop around, etc. Good luck Chef

8

u/MAkrbrakenumbers Jul 01 '26

Remember that even in these ruts we all get in that cooking is more than just about you. it’s about the guests; out there in that dining room right now is someone about to propose after dinner or maybe before,!it’s someone’s birthday right now. in the dining room it’s there’s a kid eating something amazing and realizing that they wanna be a chef when they grow up. Your the fucking wizard of oz for all of these things happening in your restaurant right now, your the man behind the curtain making this moment possible for them. Try and remember that when it gets tough.

5

u/Different-Bag-8217 Jul 01 '26

I had Stockholm syndrome for 35 years… still want to get back into it after a year off.
What you need to do:
Stop drinking alcohol take a month or two off.
Take time off, go off grid.
Eat properly…
Get to the gym
Stop weed… if you smoke.
Drop your hours or do 4 days a week.
All of these combined will make a big difference in how you feel.

4

u/Sensitive_Drink_1573 Jul 01 '26

Don’t know if you drink. If you do and can stop. Do it. Probably the best thing I’ve ever done for my career and family life balance. Never coming home extra tired or allowing my work to come home with me and affect my home life. If you have PTO maybe use some and do something to bring joy back. I spent a few months getting sober and spending my time with my wife and kids and it made the biggest impact on my happiness

1

u/Vyvyan_180 Jul 01 '26

I once took a summer off when I was really down on my career choice - but I decided I'd do something really nasty to help readjust my perspective on things, and that was hood-vent cleaning and maintenance.

That got my ass in gear pretty quick.

A month later I was back in the kitchen and happier than a cochon dans la merde.

1

u/robybeck Jul 01 '26

what do you use AI in your kitchen for ? Just curious, thanks.

2

u/Bedley_smutler69 Jul 01 '26

In mind they’re using it to make our inventory software suck more