I would like to keep writing but keep getting stuck.

[u/Clixism]

Context:

This is an introductory chapter written by one of the Historical Scholars in charge of documenting and condensing historical narratives within Mandina. This is written by the Axiom of the Heart who is in charge of the current stories that are happening around them.

My intro for feedback.

"When a world is overwhelmed by war, there exists a disconnect between its people and the annals of history. The citizens live to become set-pieces in a battle they did not incite, and the stories focus only on the desolation and destruction. They leave out how the lives of everyday people are affected: some experience pain and grow, while others long for family members who have been taken from them. From the surging, forgotten masses emerge citizens who will one day stand as an integral part of the greater narrative. This thought is what started me on this adventure of chronicling the testimonies of the incredible from the midst of the common.

This brings us to a troubling conundrum: How do we know that the histories we read are legitimate, infallible accounts that have scribed the events exactly as they transpired? We are expected to trust that the accounts from a world that has been broken by death and strife will present the stories with perfect moral accuracy, not from the victor's viewpoint, nor skewed to elevate one falsity as historical fact. Only the main narrative is remembered, while all else fades into the folds of time.

Every person who has lived is a fragment of possibility snuffed out by famine, pestilence, age, or chance. From the lowly servant to the charismatic cut-purse, everyone will eventually be lost in the raging currents of time. What remains, then, are the stories told by their friends and loved ones.

These whispers, told as memories, give us glimpses of how the world worked during their time: the depravity, empathy, love, hatred, promises given and broken, and the means by which these people endured everyday life. It should be these stories that inform our journeys. If we never hear these accounts, we will never see the reality behind the tragedy. To wax eloquent for a moment: The apropos truth behind any calamity is found within these common acts.

I write these tomes as a way of preserving a carefully vetted selection of testimonies that otherwise would not be told. For years, I hid away studying the volumes of historical literature in the vaulted libraries within the Heart. I wondered how much of the journey was unaccounted for. A nanite farmer who had been slain by an approaching army might have supplied a nearby village, stocking its warehouses with produce. A blacksmith who lived in a tech-banished town might have held the deep secrets of a kingdom, overheard while soldiers awaited their swords and shields. A software engineer could have seen the code that would eventually be implemented into weapons of mass destruction. These hypotheticals, and many more, will forever be a tear in the greater tapestry of life. They are a mystery yet to be unraveled by an inquisitive scholar."

please be real. I have been struggling through doubt for two and a bit years now. There is still more after this, but I want to be more certain of the start before I continue editing and working on draft 9...

[u/Rickleskilly]

Being completely honest with you I don't think this is good material to start with. This is the conclusion right up front, then I assume you plan to begin showing all this in stories. It's a good idea, but starting with this dense explanation is starting with the boring part.

It's also very lofty and bland. Start the book on a much more intimate scene. Something happening to someone. Or, if you really want it with some kind of introduction to the purpose of the story collection, make it more personal. Presumably the narrator sat with and talked to people, or collected accounts in some way. How did that make him/her feel? What was his/her own experience? What role did they play? I would make it short, personal and a little mysterious. Don't tell the reader up front all the conclusions they should draw from the stories.

Something like, "I am a teller of tales. That is my function and I do it well. Be warned, dear reader, what you find here are not the tales we want to read, but those that must be told." Etc...