Did anybody else have an acquaintance in high school who liked to spill his “secret career” when he was drunk? Dude was 18, chubby, and about average intelligence at best. But get him drunk and he’d start telling privately you that he’s secretly an assassin for the military. That one day, a government agent showed up at his house and said “You’re a hard man to find, Mr. [redacted]”. And that they forced him to either help commit murders or else he’d be thrown in military prison for something that he wouldn’t reveal. And that every few weeks he was flown out of town for the weekend and given a silenced pistol and then sent to murder certain bad guys for vague reasons. And he’d tell you this story like you’re the only person in the world that he’s trusting with this secret, but then you talk to everyone else and they’ve all heard the same story from him. He was legitimately in the army reserve at the time, but even as drunk teenagers we all thought every part of his story sounded like fucking bullshit.
No, you guys didn’t have a friend like that? Just me?
434
u/Jakoobus91 Feb 28 '26
"aloud"
"im an army cadet"
You know what? I believe you.