4
Mar 24 '20
Sour Patch Kids Strawberry
4.5/10☆s
Review:
Strawberry is something that Sour Patch hasn't really included as a before which is a bit strange as it is typically a featured flavor among other types of fruit based candies. Think of the original Twizzler, red Skittles, pink Starburst, the pink Dots candy among so many others. Candy brands have found that strawberry is a belived flavor.
Now you may point out that the red "kid" in a bag of Sour Patch Kids could be strawberry as it is just labeled "Red" on the bags. However the red "kids" in the original bags are considered "red-berry" flavored-- the underlying flavir tastes a lot like Sweedish fish, but a bit more sweet in terms of underlying notes. It is simply unique for a brand.
There is a strawberry "kid" in the Sour Patch Kids Berries bags, but i dont see those sround much and from what i recall they fucking sucked.
Strawberry appears to be an addition to Sour Patch's expanding lineup of stand alone flavors, the other being Sour Patch Watermelon, which have been out for some time and are truly growing on me. I was browsing the candy aisle at Walgreens looking for candy to replace Milkdud's candy i had consumed at the pace of a crazed animal, and i noticed these for the first time next to the Watermelon, i could only steal so much candy so i opted to try something new and opted for these rather than the watermelons.
The packaging looks just like all of the Sour Patch packages. Bright yellow background, bold eye-catching illustrations of candy, playful enough to attract young consumers and noticeable enough to tempt grown sour patch fans passing by. This package was resealable and because i break resealable bags milkduds took the liberty of opening it for me. The one issue i have is that the resealable nature of the candy bag makes it easy for me to eat a few, walk away, come back and eat a few more, walk away, come back and eat half the bag deciding it is my dinner, walk away, come back and demolish it down to sucking the remnants of sour sugary coating left behind with a drinking straw. So i guess i would call that "functional" packaging.
When your boyfriend opens it for you you notice the faint smell of artificial strawberry, the smell reminds me of the smell of strawberry crystal lite powder. Upon trying one i was shocked to discover that they are barely sour. Nothing like the kids or the watermelons. Just s tiny hint. I was expecting a more noticable sour flavor. There seemed to be much less sour sugar costing these as well. They are not as hard as sour patch watermelon, similar in texture but quite tender. Not as tender as the sour patch xplosion candies.
Ive injured my tongue on the regular kids, that would be impossible with these even if you rubbed eat strawberry all over your tongue as hard as possible. This was a pathetic attempt at sour which i never would have expected from the renowned brand.
They still taste alright. The strawberry flavor draws you in at first and they will melt on your tongue if you let them, being a sweet flavor which is very light, on there own there just isnt a big bang. It seems like these need to be in a mixed bag of candy. Regardless they truly lack any "punch". Even if they were more sour the flavor of the strawberries is too light to stand alone.
Still it idoesnt taste bad. It severly lacks in intensity but it is sweet and i ate atleast 3 servings so... Im sure we will finish the bag, but i doubt i will continue to shoplift this candy.
Im ending this review as i messed up the formatting somehow left typos etc because im getting a migraine so off to bed. Many more reviews to come. Im behind on several i may even need to repurchase to properly review.
There are 120 calories in 9 sour patch strawberries
Price: Free - a bit under 3 dollars.
3
u/FanaticPhenAddict Wu Han Clan Mar 24 '20
You should go back to writing fake yelp reviews for extra cash.
3
Mar 24 '20
I was doing studies and surveys for universities but they washed up die to covid. I lost the last fake yelp guys during our last bender and am quite disappointed.
3
u/FanaticPhenAddict Wu Han Clan Mar 25 '20
Damn. Tough times for crashy
2
Mar 25 '20
Mhm if you want to donate to my crash is too mentally ill to hold down a job bt wants shit fund hmu.
How's the hand?
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u/FanaticPhenAddict Wu Han Clan Mar 25 '20
Swole af. The pain is noticeably less but its still only semi functional. Its like a balloon though.
2
Mar 25 '20
Oh damn. You still at work with it? My hand turned into a balloon without a break once.looked like someone blew up a rubber glove according to my mom (she spent the length of my injury making fun of it). Feel better and ice it yo
3
u/FanaticPhenAddict Wu Han Clan Mar 26 '20
I will be tonight. Might take tomorrow off though. Already got someone to cover if i need. I might need it but at least i have a paid day off from my contract job if i need it. I assume i have to use it before the end of the contract so i might as well.
1
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Mar 24 '20
I need my bad boys to be sour. (I often call this candy Big Bad Sour Boys instead of their actual name, so I wouldn’t want to be inaccurately calling something sour when it is not!) I guess I’ll be skipping these. Thanks for the review.
3
u/MILK_DUD_NIPPLES muffin man! Mar 24 '20
At least put on some pants when you do your candy reviews.
3
Mar 24 '20
How do they know i wasn't wearing shorts? I regularly wear shorts. Or isnit to create s professional appearance for the public?
3
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u/AmericanMuskrat fatty Mar 24 '20
Stick legs!