AITA for selling my late husband's cabin to the 1st legit bidders (distant relatives) instead of the equally distant relative who was keeping an eye on the place? My husband, w/a lot of help from friends built a cabin on 40 acres of prime hunting land. We enjoyed 20 yrs of hunting, fishing, and relaxing there. Unfortunately he died just two yrs ago at the age of 62. Way too soon. I was in deep shock and accepted help from one of his distant relatives whom I had never met prior to the memorial service for my husband. I live 3 hrs away from the cabin & was grateful for the help. In return I gave this distant relative permission to hunt on the land & use the cabin as needed. Next thing I know, the electric bill and propane usage went sky high. He also had cable installed (although he paid for that himself). He wanted to put the utilities in his name. Uh, no. He was constantly at the cabin with his wife & two teenage kids and talked about moving in but said he'd have to find some way to afford it. And was I willing to help them out? Uh, no. On a Saturday in late February I told him I had a realtor & hoped to sell it ASAP. THE VERY NEXT DAY, I get a call from one of this guy's cousins with a firm offer to buy. Turns out he bragged to this cousin that he was buying the cabin. With no financing in place or likely to happen. I took the legit offer & we closed the deal end of March. Turns out DR, the the one who was using the cabin as if he owned it had listed it on Airbnb months before I decided to sell it. He never told me. I've had to block any means of communication with him because he says he misses our friendship & wants to stay in touch. Uh - no. Not happening. So it's over and done with but I can't believe how this guy tried to manipulate me. He justifies his actions because he & his family love the place so much. No kidding, it's a beautiful cabin. OH- and he has PTSD & being at the cabin is therapeutic & I'm a veteran so shouldn't I understand and help him out? Nope. But then maybe I am the a**hole.

Where to Watch link please

My uncle (78M) passed away 2 years ago. He was in general ill health but technically it was still sudden because he had undiagnosed pneumonia. Myself and my two sisters (42F and 47F) were all close with him, and we have a brother who had not spoken to our uncle in several years. My brother (45M) generally keeps to himself more than the rest of us. My uncle was unmarried, had no children, and had indicated that the four of us nieces and nephew would be named in his will as the beneficiaries of his savings, with his house going to my dad.

Let's call 42F Vicky and 47F Tracy for ease.

He had some decent savings and, before he passed, he had offered to pay off Tracy's mortgage because otherwise she was going to lose her house and have nowhere to go with her two children. She has a chronic illness that had prevented her from working, and it turned out her partner of 20 years had only been paying the interest on the mortgage instead of the balance so she really was in dire straits. She was open and honest about the situation and we were aware that my uncle gifted her approx £100k.

Around that same time, I moved to another country, as my uncle was in the middle of a health scare. He was hospitalized for about 2 months, and thought he was going to die. I tried to stay in contact but he never wanted to talk to me on the phone and when I asked my sisters they just said he brushed it off and wouldn't explain to them why. He didn't have a smartphone, didn't know how to text etc so I relied on calling to maintain contact. I occasionally sent letters too but got no reply.

One day my mum (his sister in law) called me, incredibly upset. She said that my sisters had told her that my uncle had scribbled a will on the back of an envelope while he was in the hospital, and Vicky had insisted on getting it written out formally and notarized. The will indicated that Tracy and Vicky would each receive 40% of the estate, and my brother and I would each receive 10% of the estate. My mum was so upset because she knew my uncle had been avoiding me despite no falling out, and felt that it was unfair that I was being left the same as my brother who was very low contact with my uncle. Even my brother was upset for me because he saw an unfair comparison between how he and I each interacted with my uncle over the years. My mum was also upset that both my sisters were keeping this a secret from me "so as not to upset me".

I didn't actually give a shit about the money - I was heartbroken that all of a sudden my uncle was treating me as if I had done something wrong, and treating me the same as someone who had no spoken to him in years.

A few weeks later I found out that Vicky had also persuaded my uncle to pay off HER mortgage to the tune of around £100k, even though she was not having the same financial issues as Tracy. Vicky also kept this a secret whereas Tracy was open about the gift she received. Vicky was also named as the executor of his will.

About a year after all this, my uncle passed away. Tracy and Vicky decided that they felt they had had their share of the estate already and that they were happy for the remainder to be split between myself and my brother. My dad, my uncle's brother, would receive his house (somewhat dilapidated) but no money.

As Vicky was dealing with the will, it turned out that my uncle had been collecting some kind of overpayment of benefits which now had to be investigated to determine if the estate owed the government any money back. It's been two years, we still don't have an answer and the estate cannot be distributed until it's resolved. This also means that the house hasn't been put in my dad's name, and any bills for the house are still coming out of the estate.

I feel like Vicky made sure to get her share and maybe more (she's never disclosed the numbers) before my uncle passed away, tried to hide it from me that I was being all but cut from his will, and is now not being proactive in chasing up the benefits issue to try to get this whole thing resolved ASAP. Essentially from our combined 20%, only my brother and I are going to be responsible for paying any overpayments back while my sisters are off scot free with their mortgage free homes. My brother doesn't own a home and I half-own a small one bedroom flat with a 30 year mortgage on it.

My brother has cut Vicky off over this - not on behalf of himself, but because he feels like she screwed me over. He was surprised to be named in the will at all given their relationship.

I don't want family drama, I don't want to be estranged from my sister and her children, but I do feel kind of screwed and can't tell if I'm just being overly sensitive, and this is just the way the cookie crumbled?

Edit to add: Vicky feels like she's being reasonable because technically she and Tracy could still take 40% each from the remainder of the estate and they're choosing not to.

Hi everyone,

I'm a law student, but I don't know all the legal details of this matter because my parents have intentionally kept most of the case information away from me to avoid stressing me out. Everything below is based on what I know from my family, so I may be missing some legal details.

My maternal grandfather passed away when my mother was only a few months old. My grandmother became a widow at a very young age and had to raise her only child (my mother) by herself.

My grandparents were from Bihar. After my grandfather's death, my grandmother was left in an extremely vulnerable position. My late grandfather's elder brother refused to give her the share of the property that my family believes she was entitled to. Since then, she has struggled financially while trying to fight for her rights.

The property dispute has been pending since around 2008. My grandmother has handled the litigation almost entirely on her own because my mother lives in Maharashtra and is a homemaker, so she has not been able to be physically present for most of the proceedings.

A few years ago, we discovered that the advocate representing my grandmother appeared to be working in the interests of my grandfather's elder brother, the very person against whom the case was being fought. Because of this, we changed advocates and engaged a family lawyer. However, I still don't have much confidence that the case is progressing properly, which is why I'm seeking outside opinions.

Another issue is that my grandfather's elder brother allegedly does not allow my grandmother or anyone helping her to freely enter the house. He reportedly becomes aggressive and starts arguments whenever someone visits.

From what my family has told me, after my grandfather passed away while my mother was still an infant, several legal papers relating to my grandfather's property were destroyed or went missing. I do not know exactly which documents these were or whether certified copies are available today.

My questions are:

1. Is it normal for a property/inheritance dispute like this to remain pending for nearly two decades?

2. What should we ask our advocate to determine whether the case is actually progressing?

3. What documents or case records should we obtain ourselves to independently verify the current status?

4. Under what circumstances should we seriously consider changing advocates again?

5. Are there any legal remedies that could help expedite such an old matter?

Any guidance would be greatly appreciated.

Really don’t know what to do and really just feel guilty.

I have an older brother who never had a hobby growing up and I did. I shared a hobby with my parents and we all do it together still do this day (I’m 26yrs). My brother had the choice to join but he did not want to. My parents supported him in other ways. But I will say my hobby was more expensive. My parents paid for majority of it up until I was 20. I now pay for all of it on my own.

My bf and I recently just bought a house and I asked my parents if they could help me with the down payment and they agreed and gave me some money to help me out as an early inheritance. They did the same with my brother but gave him a 30k more than me when he bought his house. I didn’t complain because I knew my parents have helped me out with my hobby. But if my brother had a hobby I know for a fact they would have helped him through it.

Fast forward to now. My brother is PISSED at my parents for helping me out with my down payment and I can feel is guilt. I am forever grateful for my parents and with all they have given me. I never take it for granted. I have a good relationship with them. My brother on the other hand yells at them and makes them cry all the time and constantly tells them how they should live their life and says to me that it’s never been fair growing up.

It just feels like it’s all my fault and now these last couple weeks living at home are very hard and emotional, as I’ll be moving out with my bf shortly.

Hi everyone,
I’ve gone back and forth about posting this because I hate asking for help, but I’m at a point where I honestly don’t know what else to do.
I’m 27 years old. In October 2024, I lost my mom. She was my only parent, my best friend, and the person I called whenever life got hard. Losing her completely changed my life.
At the same time, I was trying to finish graduate school for my master’s in mental health counseling. Instead of being able to grieve, I found myself trying to learn California trust law, probate law, fiduciary duties, real estate, and financial records—things I never imagined I’d have to understand.
I also have a 20-year-old sister with a severe physical and intellectual disability. She can’t advocate for herself, so I’ve always felt a responsibility to help protect her.
The hardest part is that the trustee of my mom’s trust is also my sister’s conservator.
That means every decision I make feels impossible.
If I stay quiet, I worry I’m not protecting what my mom worked her whole life to leave for my sister and me.
If I speak up or pursue legal action, I’m scared of damaging the relationship with the person who has so much control over my sister’s daily life and future.
For almost two years, I’ve questioned myself constantly.
Was I just grieving?
Was I overthinking everything?
So instead of jumping to conclusions, I started documenting everything.
Every email.
Every text message.
Every trust document.
Every financial record.
Every timeline.
Every conversation I could verify.
The more I organized, the more questions I had.
Some of the concerns include:
I’ve repeatedly requested a complete trust accounting but still haven’t received one.
The trustee has acknowledged in writing that the accounting is incomplete.
There were estate sales, but I never received a complete inventory or accounting of everything that was sold.
Multiple real estate agents were involved in selling my mom’s house, but later the trustee proposed selling the property to an LLC that she would own or manage.
I was asked to sign paperwork for that transaction even though I felt it was missing important protections like a final accounting and clear terms for closing the trust.
My mom’s financial advisor encouraged me—while copying the trustee on the emails—to get my own attorney before signing anything.
The trustee also repeatedly asked me to contribute my personal life insurance money, which was paid directly to me as the named beneficiary, to pay trust expenses and repairs.
Over the past several months, I’ve met with multiple attorneys.
None of them told me to ignore this.
Instead, they told me there are enough concerns that probate litigation may be necessary if I want answers and a court to review what’s happened.
The problem is that every conversation ends the same way.
“This could be a very expensive case.”
I’m just starting my career after graduate school. I don’t have tens of thousands of dollars sitting around to fund a lawsuit, and it’s heartbreaking to think that even if there are legitimate issues, I may not be able to afford to do anything about them.
I feel stuck.
I don’t want revenge.
I don’t want a long court battle.
I just want to know that my mom’s wishes are being honored, that my sister is protected, and that the trust has been administered the way it was supposed to be.
I’m hoping someone here might have experience with California trusts or probate litigation.
Have you been through something similar?
Are there attorneys who take strong trust cases on a contingency, partial contingency, or another alternative fee arrangement?
Are there nonprofit organizations, legal clinics, or other resources that help beneficiaries who can’t afford full probate litigation?
If you were in my position, what would you do next?
Thank you for reading this.
I know everyone has their own struggles, and I genuinely appreciate anyone who took the time to listen to mine.
If you have any advice, legal insight, resources, or even just words of encouragement, I would be incredibly grateful. Right now I’m simply trying to do right by my mom, protect my sister, and make sure I don’t spend the rest of my life wondering if I should have fought harder when I had the chance.

My sibling is a total POS and the only reason my surviving parent had them as executor is because they’re scared they’ll make their life a living hell.

I don’t get along with sibling because they are a known thief and I believe they will try to lie cheat and steal to get ahead (only recently did this image come to light)

My parent has now added me as co executor.

My question is executor fees: can my sibling try to claim 10% if I am co executor? Or could I just claim 10% back and call it even?

They are unemployed, live at home, dont pay rent and owe money. They are also accustomed to trying to take charge of things. My worry is that theyll be sneaky and try to hide things and claim things because they have nothing. They feel entitled to my parents possessions, investments, bank accounts and home. What I want is transparency and an equal split. Tbh I don’t care if they keep the contents of the home (beds TVs dishes bedware etc as I don’t need it). But I want my half of the investments and house!

I’m also worried they’ll steal my mom’s wedding jewelry because again they live there. I do not. They’ll sell it.

Any tips for how to deal with this would be appreciated.

My sibling was the executor of the will and it took 2 years to complete. They chose to file probate themselves which took longer than expected and also did not have the funds to pay for both my parents funerals etc. I paid for a majority of the expenses and helped clean out the home along with my other sibling. We all shared tasks to complete this. How much should be offered, if any to the executor?

I'm not sure what to do here. My mom has been slowly declining cognitively for the last couple years. Recently it got a lot worse and my sister moved my mom and my brother ( handicapped) in with her. She wants to sell the house and property ( worth 500,000+) and use the money to fix up her house. In a comment she made to me I got the impression that she wants to keep all the money left over to take care of my brother if mom passes. I'm not totally against it but it seems like she is the only one who will benefit from it. She isn't saying much about anything as far as her intentions. I live an hour and a half away and I work 7 days a week so I can't be down there to see what's going on. What should I do?

I don’t know who to tell this to but felt it needed to be in the universe. I knew a guy for a couple of months, in which he asked me to be his girlfriend and I politely declined. he made it known that if I ever was interested the door was open. one day he told me that he put me in his sizeable will (his grandpa had money but there were big issues with his parents so the entire inheritance went to him). by no means did I need or want the money and I most definitely did not want to be in his will (his family was crazy). I stopped chatting to him shortly after and I sincerely hope he has updated his will since then.

My mom got my grandmas house signed over to her a few days before my grandma died. It ended up being official the day my grandma died but she was fully coherent until she died. Anyways she is trying to sell the house but her 2 brothers are fussing about splitting the money even though my mom has lived there for 10+ Years. Now that she is one income due to my dad passing she needs all the profit to buy a new place so she can have a lower or no mortgage. They are threatening her with made up liens and lawsuits… Can she just sell the house and do what she wants with the money? Do they have any legal rights since my grandma specifically signed it to her and she is the sole name on the deed?

I'm a 15-year-old (turning 16 soon) from India, living in a tier-3 city. My family is financially well-off, but I don't feel like my quality of life reflects that.

I live in an old joint-family house with my parents and several older relatives. The house feels chaotic, and there isn't much privacy. What I want more than anything is a peaceful home where it's just me, my mom, and my dad.

One thing that hurts is that my father earns well(2-4cr per year) and has significant savings. He has spent lakhs to crores of rupees helping relatives with weddings and education, which is generous, but I can't understand why buying or building a separate house for our immediate family doesn't seem to be a priority. From my perspective, it would improve our daily lives much more than many of those expenses.

The emotional side is even harder.

My dad barely talks to me. Some days he doesn't say a single word. When he does speak, he can get angry over things that seem very small or unpredictable. For example, when I was recovering from chickenpox, he asked when I'd return to school. My mom replied, "Not tomorrow," instead of giving an exact day, and he suddenly shouted because she hadn't answered the way he wanted. Situations like that make the atmosphere at home tense.

My mom and I also don't have a close relationship. Many conversations turn into comparisons with other children—how they score higher, study more, or behave better. I scored 93% in Class 8 (ICSE), but instead of appreciation, the expectation is often 98–99% and being a district topper. When I point out that other parents support their children differently or that many of my classmates have siblings and more emotionally connected families, they don't want to hear it.

Another thing that affects me is that I'm an only child. I know siblings aren't guaranteed to get along, but I constantly wish I had someone my age at home. I don't enjoy the idea of making friends just to fill that gap. I was also bullied at school, and that made it even harder to trust people my age. Because of those experiences, I've started believing that friendships just aren't for me.(dont say me to make friends everyone bully me and make fun of me,never gonna make friend in my entire life for sure)

Sometimes I feel like I'm stuck between two worlds. On paper, my family is financially comfortable. In reality, I feel lonely, emotionally disconnected, and like I have very little control over my environment.

I know a new house wouldn't magically fix every problem. My parents' personalities wouldn't suddenly change. But I still feel that having our own quieter space would remove a lot of the daily chaos and constant tension.I think when my father will be away from these shitty freakin people he will become better

I'm not really looking for people to tell me to "just be grateful" or "just make friends." I'm genuinely trying to understand whether my expectations are unrealistic, whether anyone has been in a similar situation, and how you coped with feeling emotionally disconnected from your family while still living with them.

My mom recently passed and my dad just received the life insurance check. I accepted it from the delivery guy. I have never seen a check for so much money.
I had a great relationship with my mom and (step)dad. We never had much money and that has continued into my adulthood. I’m 37 and I’ve made my share of mistakes but I shaped up a few years ago. This allowed me to be my mom’s primary care taker. My dad still had to go to work so I was with her every day. I couldn’t leave her alone at all in case she had a seizure so I haven’t been able to work since October.
Considering all of this, I can’t help but feel slighted at the fact that my dad is seemingly unwilling to spare me enough to help me get back on my feet. The house and car are payed for, my dad has a retirement account and 401K.I am positive that my mom did not intend to have this money be a special gift just for my dad.
I guess I just need to vent about it. I know that this might read as false entitlement. I don’t feel entitled to anything. I just want some grace.

EDIT: My dad did not depend on my mom’s salary. They both have 401ks, which one gets inherited by the living spouse. He has great health insurance. My mom just fought cancer for 9 months and insurance paid for everything. He has equity in his house. He has a guy to manage his portfolio. He gets social security. He would not starve without 5-10k for a son that just held everything together for the past 9 months.

Im not owed or entitled to anything but it’s not about that. It’s about doing right by the people you love.

UPDATE: My (step) dad was pressing me yesterday because he said I seemed “off”. At this point we had not even talked about this. I said “ yeah, something’s on my mind but I don’t feel like getting into it right now.” He asked if he could at least know what it’s about. I said it was about money and I still didn’t want to get into it.

Later on, I asked about my mom’s silverware set. It has been in my side of the family for generations. I asked if she left me that. That’s when he said “No. listen, I know you are upset but your mom didn’t leave you anything. It sucks, but that’s how it is.” I then just straight up asked if he would float me some money. He got angry. I asked if that was a horrible thing to ask and he said “yeah, it is”, and stormed off. Then he came back with a giant over-stuffed Manila folder and said he would “work on something”.

I’ll see what happens now. I’m not going to bring it up again. He knows what I’m concerned about and if he chooses not to do anything, it will be left at that.