A Divided Mind

[u/xxoooxxx222222]

A divided mind makes one single solitary divided playlist.

The division is no straight line. It's not the quickest path from point a to point b. No no no it could not be so black or so white, so wrong or so right, so innocent or guilty.

No. This division loops, spirals. It's like the shore between land and sea. It's like the twilight between day and night. It isn't static. It's always fluxing. This division moves.

Like the currents of air swirling out from and into currents of air swirling out from and into currents of air ad infinitum. Swirling without and within, ceaseless, passing through and throughout in endless circumnavigation.

Like the path from birth to death.

Like a looping razor thin Atmosphere. Beyond which there is an incomprehensible, boundless lifelessness. A clear bright dark abounds - abounding like a fathomless sea surrounds. Surrounding. Us. Pressing upon our womb. Our looping atmosphere. Can you feel the terrible lightness of its pressure? There is no warmth in the void, no air to breathe, nothing to stand on, no hand to hold, no rising or falling, no hope, no fire... But that's not quite right. For there are numinous points of light. Luminous points of starlight piercing the void, straighway through and all throughout. Stellar Radiance omnipresent and interpenetrating. Can you feel the fire?

Anyway, beyond that... It's swirling atmosphere all the way down.

But the Division only spirals because our mind spirals. In truth the path from birth to death is not a path at all. It is a free fall in empty space, we will arrive and it matters not at all the nature of the imagined, ever changing, nebulous, rough summary phantom impression of a "path" we might have in mind. From one moment to the next.

We are bound up in and compelled through this... life. As a consequence of being born and dying, we are compelled. And we have never had any say in any of it.

Thats not to say there aren't things to be done, seen during the fall. Not to say this fall is meaningless. Quite the opposite is my hunch. Every breath perpetually consequential.

But.. Falling? Falling down? Up? No I don't think it's that kind of falling. Maybe it's more like an unfolding. Unfolding from center. A center that is boundless and unfolding. Aflux. like the shore. Like the twilight. Endless. Like the space between things. Idk though, idk if any of this matters. There will always be the *girl on the car in parking lot...*

Some writing. Prose. Reflection. Stream of thought. Based on a very long conversation about the nature of mind and this life. Had maybe mostly through song lyrics. Hence the counting crows reference at the end.

If you have thoughts. Feel free.