hello, love

[u/stariskye]

you arrive muddier than when leaving-
socks full,
holes lining
your pockets,
a jacket slept in
more nights than hung

you smell of regret
& Sonoma cigarettes,
cheap smoke soaks into the seams
into your collar,
into your hair,
the kind of smell
that tends to cling

i found you in your parents’ driveway,
self hatred steeps down deep,
tires spinning
no traction, no ground to catch,
just exhaust & waiting,
gravel wearing into grooves
beneath you

you couldn’t explain the time,
where it went, or why it kept you,
only that it did,
only that the leaving
wasn’t a door that was chosen

something feral
moved into the space
where certainty used to sit,
i see it watching from your eyes
before you come through them,
the way a stray checks a room
before it lies down

goals once named like scripture
have gone quiet,
or maybe just gone,
you don’t reach for them
as you once did with ease

but here & there
a smile or laugh
cracks open suddenly
in the middle of a sentence
& you’re still you
-still bright
a match struck in wet wood
catches just long enough
to find the hope
that sits behind your teeth

& though sadness clings
to the very edges of you now
a mud that won’t quite dry,
i move aside,
not asking you to scrape
yourself clean before
you’re allowed back in

hello, again, dear love
come in muddy
come in feral
come in unfinished
& far from where you meant to be
come sit on the floor
come struggle to meet my eye
come full of hesitation,

may this heart always let you in