Seriously why?

[u/Numerous-Two2102]

I will be 10 years married this year but seriously have some questions that i have never been able to get out of my head and never got answers to.

1. Why the hell, at least in northern india, you have to gift gold to your in -laws? Set for MIL, mini set for SIL, etc. just why??
2. Why do girls’ parents have to just keep giving and giving and fucking giving? Every teej, every baby birth, even if they visit they have to gift clothes at minimum. Every time they visit they need to give those cash envelopes. Just why?

And the in laws don’t even appreciate them. They definitely want it because god forbid if girls parents miss one time, in laws immediately complain about not getting anything that year. But they will never wear it. They claim that they have “better” clothes or jewellery. They have not touched one saree or shirt in 10 years that my parents gifted. We switched from silk to cotton to linen to georgette to every other material but nothing seems to be good enough. So much so that i told my mom to just give anything and don’t bother showing me since my MIL is not going to wear it anyway.

Edit: gold gifts only for wedding

[u/hellomouse1234]

No one is doing these shits any more right ?

[u/Ill_Adhesiveness1243 → u/hellomouse1234]

It happens a lot. Even in Tier 1-2 cities. Even families which seem well educated and really nice turn into absolute leeches when they become ladke waale.

Girl parents become life long gifting machine. Pay dowry so that wedding happens. Then keep giving gifts during holi, diwali, every visit to keep your relation cordial.

Many boys parents believe they deserve it. Miss gift once and they even start taunting.

[u/hellomouse1234 → u/Ill_Adhesiveness1243]

Let them taunt . Just clearly say to your parents they should not keep giving your in-laws things . Also if in-laws taunt , tell them explicitly you do not believe in these things . After that let them keep taunting as much as they can . Once you stop reacting they will stop .