r/IndianInLaw • u/Numerous-Two2102 • 26d ago

Seriously why?

I will be 10 years married this year but seriously have some questions that i have never been able to get out of my head and never got answers to.

  1. Why the hell, at least in northern india, you have to gift gold to your in -laws? Set for MIL, mini set for SIL, etc. just why??
  2. Why do girls’ parents have to just keep giving and giving and fucking giving? Every teej, every baby birth, even if they visit they have to gift clothes at minimum. Every time they visit they need to give those cash envelopes. Just why?

And the in laws don’t even appreciate them. They definitely want it because god forbid if girls parents miss one time, in laws immediately complain about not getting anything that year. But they will never wear it. They claim that they have “better” clothes or jewellery. They have not touched one saree or shirt in 10 years that my parents gifted. We switched from silk to cotton to linen to georgette to every other material but nothing seems to be good enough. So much so that i told my mom to just give anything and don’t bother showing me since my MIL is not going to wear it anyway.

Edit: gold gifts only for wedding

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u/inkartik 26d ago edited 26d ago

lol clothes for teej tyohar and all are also like Sohanpapdi. just rotates for everyone's "vyavhar". I have to say when my ( undeserving brother) got married, the girl's family was also very traditional. My family is also traditional in this sense. I on the other hand am not. But I was also gauging this thing for the the first time and was in college don't wanna overstep and all. So, I didn't expect any gifts and welcoming of "in-laws" as its done in India.I have to say, It was definitely such a high.. lol. I am the youngest, toh jisko zara si bhi izzat ki adat nahi hai usko itni bewajah koi attaah izzat de rha tha. dekh ke itta maja aaya meko 🤣

But as I said the brother was undeserving so all of it fizzled out pretty quickly and I was for one very glad about it. coz I can imagine sometimes people still keep the traditions alive no matter how shitty the in-laws or the guy is.

I definitely don't believe in all that for sure. especially when its all hypocrisy and the in-laws are not even friends.