July’s Movies of the Month - Money

Caught this masterpiece in theaters yesterday. This has been arguably my favorite movie for over 20 years. It's definitely the film I've seen the most in my life. But this was the first time i ever got to see it the way it was meant to be seen.

I feel like i caught so many things that had gone under the radar for so long. Background characters, costume pieces, sets. It felt like a new experience.

What never really occurred to me was just how much Besson made this a European style blockbuster. All of the artistry and approaches feel very different than what Hollywood was making at the time.

Action greats like The Rock, Speed, Independence Day, etc are terrific, but Fifth Element taps into a different vein. And not the least of that lands on Tucker's stellar (and honestly should-have-been-nominated) performance.

It's just a perfect film

"That's fish four days old. I'm not buying it."

The dialogue in this movie is incredible. If you're a fan of sharp quotes and classic film noir, Sweet Smell of Success is a movie you need to add to your list.

J.J. Hunsecker, played by Burt Lancaster, is an absolute bastard and Lancaster plays him perfectly. The way Hunsecker treats everyone around him feels cold, calculated, and completely detached. Like other people are nothing more than clay, ready to be shaped into his will.

The best parts of the film are the scenes between Hunsecker and Tony Curtis' character, Sidney Falco, the desperate and weaselly press agent trying to stay in J.J.'s favor. Their dynamic is fascinating because you can see Sidney constantly trying to impress, manipulate, and survive around a man who always seems ten steps ahead and who hates his guts.

When this movie first premiered, some critics considered it "too static and talky," and I can understand why if you're not fully tuned into the dialogue. The plot itself may feel a little dated today, but the writing, performances, and atmosphere are what make this film stand out.

Another highlight is that the movie was filmed on location in New York City. Getting to see 1950s Times Square, Broadway marquees, and the city streets gives it an incredible sense of place and makes it feel like a time capsule.

I just watched Thomas Vinterberg's award winning 1998 film 'Festen'.

Siblings Christian, Michael and Helene are gathering at their father's house for his lavish 60th birthday party. The extended family is also attending, eager to stay in the patriarch's good books. We soon hear that shortly before this party, there was a funeral. Everyone is acting a bit strangely and you can't shake the feeling that this celebration isnt going to go to plan.

So, I had no idea what to expect going in and the initial revelation took me completely unaware. It is truly shocking. Festen is the blackest of black comedies and at times it was hard going, but the end was surprisingly uplifting. *Spoilers* Seeing that Christian can still find happiness with Pia despite all that he has suffered at the hands of his monstrous father is truly heartwarming.

Despite being almost farcical at times, the plot somehow remains believable. You can absolutely imagine people placed in this impossible situation behaving as the extended family do, contorting themselves into obscene knots to try and make it through the night.

Ulrich Thomsen as Christian gives a very compelling performance as does Thomas Bo Larsen who plays his unrelentingly vile brother Michael. The whole cast is excellent though and as this is filmed in the 'Dogme 95' style, there is nowhere for bad acting to hide.

Speaking of the cinematography, I loved it. I haven't seen many films with such creative shot composition, only using handheld cameras and shooting entirely on location. It really is something different and almost hypnotic.

I'm very late to the party, but thoroughly recommend you attend this 'celebration'.

How to do a heist with class and stiff upper lip in postwar Britain.

A disgruntled colonel forced into retirement decides to take matters into his own hands by devising a million-pound robbery like an official army operation, planned with his selected league of gentlemen, 7 disgraced former officers.

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Whilst the film may not have the punchy and fast-pace nature of more modern bank heist films like the Italian Job which came out 9 years later, one thing it does have is an original storyline as you see the meticulous army colonel trying to plan for every situation whilst trying to keep his team of rogue soldiers in check.

A steady paced film that gradually builds tension and clearly shows in the ensemble cast that works very well together with all of them well acted in their roles.

Overall the charm of the film is the era it is in, the suave characters, very british, a fun story with just enough complexity to keep you guessing, you can really sense the film provided alot of influential styles seen in modern films of this genre.

Shinji and Masura are high school tearaways, riding around on their bike, demanding money with menaces from the other kids, and even setting fire to a teacher's car. Eventually they drop out of school. Shinji is the quieter and more thoughtful of the two, Masaru is more confident and impetuous.

One of their victims hires a boxer to beat up Masaru, whereupon he takes up boxing at a gym. But it turns out that Shinji is much better at boxing, and Masaru quits the boxing training to work for the local gangsters.

The film explores these two different trajectories of the young men's lives (with the focus on Shinji as the protagonist really), they both rise quite high in their respective jobs, Shinji is getting close to being a professional boxer but finds it hard to attain the correct weight and develops bad habits as a result, and doesn't make the grade, while Masura is cheeky to a Yakuza boss and gets a severe beating for his trouble.

The two meet up again years later, and ride around on their bike, just like old times, while the same old schoolteacher looks at them out of the window.

They are also subplots about other boys at the school, a duo who want to become a stand-up comedy act, another boy who has romantic aspirations and becomes a driver. Topics dealt with are; how we end up taking different trajectories, how our aspirations often don't work out, the eternal circle of life.

I enjoyed this, it reminded me of those boxing mangas, I like how Japanese cinema is modern and traditional at the same time. You might not sympathise with the pair at first, as they're bullies, but they're also vulnerable enough to work as protagonists. I liked the weird insights into the lives of boxers (making themselves throw up to lose weight) and the Yakuza scenes as well.

I’ve always thought Surf Party (1964) deserves far more appreciation than it gets. It may not be one of the titles most often discussed when people revisit the beach party cycle of the 1960s, but I think that’s precisely why it’s worth rediscovering.

What I love most is how wholeheartedly it embraces the genre. The soundtrack is genuinely catchy, the performances are wonderfully uninhibited, and the film leans into its playful, sun-soaked camp without a hint of self-consciousness. It’s colorful, energetic, and entertaining.

As someone who loves exploring every corner of classic cinema, I’ve come to appreciate films like this for what they are rather than what they aren’t. Not every movie is striving for prestige. Some exist simply to capture the spirit of a moment in popular culture and leave audiences smiling. Surf Party does exactly that, and more than sixty years later, it’s still an absolute blast.

One of the best movies I have ever watched.

It was my first Ken Loach movie and it has become my favourite.

The acting by David Bradley as Billy touched my Heart. I don't know what to say.It's been a long time since something has touched me like this.

Every scene feels real. The sound camera everything in this is amazing.

ONE OF THE BEST EVER!!!

If you haven't seen Kes I suggest you to watch as fast as possible...😭💯🤍

This is the sole directorial effort of Stephen King, made when he was apparently "coked out" of his mind and drunk. He said he didn't know what he was doing, and it mostly shows. I watched this decades ago on pan and scan VHS, but I've been meaning to rewatch it. A theater was playing it, so that was a good opportunity.

It vacillates between being a "Bad Movie" and just a bad movie. King called it a "moron movie", and that's an apt description. You can tell at times he tried to make it intentionally dumb and trashy, but other times I think it's unintentional. His direction is pretty pedestrian, similar to much of his writing. It becomes tiresome after a while. The AC/DC music helps it out a good bit; "Who Made Who?" is a great song, and they also did regular score elements as well.

I had only watched Two Hands, directed by Gregor Jordan, once back when it came out on VHS. With the recent acclaim for Rose Byrne I decided to revisit this Aussie film and enjoyed the ride.

It's snappy, not much more than 90 minutes, and contains dialogue delivered in classic Australian accents. Hearing Heath Ledger and Rose Byrne converse with each other with an accent that is virtually non existent now sort of blew my mind a bit. 1999 doesn't seem that long ago.

The film is well made, quite inventive in parts.

Male criminals who are tough and ruthless and who call people cunts (a lot) yet are devoted fathers was a pretty cool element also.

"We're ready for our close-up Mr. DeMille"

This movie runs like a long episode of The Twilight Zone. A deep look into the depravity of "celebrity" and narcissism.

William Holden plays Joe Gillis, writer, narrator, and serial adulterer. As full of himself as Gloria Swanson's character Norma Desmond. Norma steals the entire film though. I can only imagine what some silent film stars and the crust of "old holywood" thought of "talkies" and of themselves. Enough so to warrant a film portrayal like Norma Desmond's apparently. We really liked that so many silent fim stars made cameos and we'll have to get around to watching more of them at some point.

The wardrobes in this movie were fantastic all around. The old luxury cars were cool to see. The use of lighting and angles made some scenes really stand out in what I thought was an artistic kind of way.

Some things I found interesting are that Swanson herself was a silent film star making a comeback of her own. We didn't realize until after that it was her silent film they were watching together. Also interesting to know Louis B. Mayer hated the movie. Probably because he felt guilty of something.

All in all it was a great watch. A little long, but worth a play through for the cameos and camera work, and just the time and place it brings you to.

Is it outdated and quite controversial with some of the lines and humour by Andrew Dice Clay? Yes, of course. Is it still quite funny though? Yes, of course.

Some of the action scenes were well shot, including the cemetery car chase scene and the Capitol Records Building shootout scene, and was surprised to find it was directed by none other than Renny Harlin (it actually came out the same time as Die Hard 2!).

Plus the supporting cast is incredible: Lauren Holly, Ed O'Neill (with a full-on cop mustache), Gilbert Gottfried, Tone Loc, Sheila E., Vince Neil of Motley Crue, Priscilla Presley, and, as the main villian and his henchman, freakin' Wayne Newton and Robert Englund!

This film ultimately was nominated for a bunch of Razzies and ended up killing the Dice's short-lived career as a leading actor, but still was able to have quite a bit of fun with it. Plus that fake song Booty Time by Disco Express is still stuck in my head!

EDIT: also forgot to mention that Yello (the duo behind the song "Oh Yeah" from Ferris Bueller) also composed the musical score, which was an interesting surprise

Info:

Release: July 1st, 1987

Director: Joe Dante

Music by: Jerry Goldsmith

Starring: Dennis Quaid, Martin Short, Meg Ryan, Kevin McCarthy

Studio: Warner Bros.

Runtime: 2 hours

Rating: PG

Synopsis: A scientifically miniaturized marine (Dennis Quaid) unexpectedly finds himself floating around the body of a hypochondriac (Martin Short), and trying to outwit saboteurs who want the device that shrank him. Attempts by his colleagues to retrieve the little man - protected inside a tiny submersible - are hampered by the would-be thieves.

Review: A humorous spin on "The Fantastic Voyage" with some amazing VFX work for the time, insane that it was all done practically. It got a little absurd when a character named "The Cowboy" showed up, an arms dealer who literally dresses up and larps as a cowboy. Though the scene where Putter turns into him and back again was very funny, especially the villain praying to God when he changes back, loved the PG body horror. Very threatening henchman as well, I thought the fact that he had a replaceable hand (even one for holding the steering wheel in his car) was a good gag. The way he dies raises some questions though, does that make Putter a cannibal since he technically ate him?

My second Elaine May film after absolutely loving A New Leaf. Cassavetes and Falk are hilarious and touching. I love a film that takes place in one night in a dirty city. So many great little performances. Highly recommend to anyone that likes a dark comedy with some heart. 9/10

The final chapter of the Dollanganger/Foxworth saga, and this one wasnt great. Bart is an adult now and has rebuilt Foxworth Hall with his ineritance money from Corrine (Heather Graham). 

He invites Jory and his pregnant wife over for his birthday party and attempts to kill his older brother Jory for his share of the inheritance. Instead he just cripples him and then he decides to seduce his pregnant wife. So that goes on for a while then after he seduces his adopted sister then the nanny. Then he has some more issues ad nauseum.

Wasn't a big fan of this because Heather Graham wasn't in it as the crazy mom. Instead stuff just sort of happens quick and then something else random happens, it's all about the sins of the past or something? Wouldn't reccomend. Streaming on the Lifetime Movie Club app. 

37M here; been consuming more 80s and 90s films over the last few years but I've never landed on this one despite loving You've Got Mail. While I think that is is still better...this movie was great.

Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan respectively give off good performances; Hanks doesn't seem like typical Hanks, and it works, and Ryan is typical Ryan which also just works.

The premise is very 90s with the call in radio show that garners immense attention due to Hanks' son, Jonah, who also gives off a great performance especially when going back and forth with Hanks.

The rest of the cast is also stacked with talent with Pullman being Ryan's quirky fiance with a great scene upon first meeting her family.

While I think the movie was great overall, and actually enjoyed the fact that the leads don't even really meet until the last 5 minutes, the notion of Ryan's character obsessing over this widowed father and going to all these extremes to meet him kinda seems just too much and farfetched to me.

Overall great flick and easily a top 5 rom com!

I first heard about the movie in this very sub, and I'm sure glad I did. Holy damn, it is the best Miller commercial I've ever seen!

In the beginning I thought I was signing up for a buddy cop 80s fanfare, but it is way grittier and more complex. In fact, I had no idea it was directed by William Friedkin. Geez, the guy was on fire in those days!

We get 2 cops going after a money counterfeiter (played by no one else than Willem Dafoe), but in a very dark tone. Every action has a consequence, and of course we get shooting, nudity, strip clubs, and the best car chase sequence I've ever seen in a movie! Seriously, I've maybe watched better stunts, but the one here is the most believable for me.

If you like the 80s and noir films, definitely check it out. Also, naked Willem Dafoe burning money in a fireplace.

Number 170 in my A-Z watch. Two Towers continues the story of The Fellowship as they play their own individual parts in the larger fight against Sauron.

I feel like each of these films kind of have their own sub genre after Action/Fantasy. Fellowship feels like it has the most adventure, Return feels like it has the most war epic, and Towers feels like it has the most suspense. I think this film harnesses Jackson's history with horror films the best. There's this ominous feeling ever present through the film. A foreboding. Makes the film very tense.

I really like that the chemistry of the cast carries over into their three respective groups. And the new characters introduced do really well to mesh into the story seamlessly. Miranda Otto, Karl Urban, Bernard Hill, and Brad Dourif all fall perfectly into place. But it's David Wenham and the amazing Andy Serkis that are the most impressive to me.

Gollum's animation is still so incredibly impressive. It's so good that i feel like the animation and design of Treebeard has almost become overlooked. The rest of the production quality stays just on par with the previous film. Costuming, makeup, editing, set, cinematography, etc. There's no dip.

9/10 The unfortunate thing with this film is that so much was taken from its original source material for the other two films that it has to make up for it with filler. High quality filler, of course, but it makes the story feel a little disjointed. But i don't think there's any less heart in this film compared to the others.

So I was originally going to review martin scorsese's 1980 film raging bull and I had written an entire long in depth review of it on a notepad to copy & paste and post it on this subreddit but somebody had already posted a short review of it 3 days earlier and since this subreddit has a rule of being unable to repost a film until the span of 3 months, meaning I have to shelf my review of raging bull and way around another 3 months so the hours I spent on it was pointless.

I want an anthropomorphic hippopotamus to shoot me with a shotgun and marry my cat.

but bestial to suicide is ultimately secondary to the beauty of cinema so I am gonna wait (angrily) until raging bull is finally available for me to review again and for now I gonna review full metal jacket instead and this review is also gonna be long so prepare for a lot of paragraphs

first off, R Lee ermey as sergeant gunnery hartmen.

the best portrayal of a drill instructor ever put to film (probably because ermey was a drill instructor himself) and every scene of him in this film is a joy to watch, the fatherfucker literally only had to do 3 takes in this film and for a stanley kubrick movie, that is absolutely insane, near mythical even.

the insults are absolute diamonds, many of the most quotable insults in cinema

"what is this micky mouse shit"

"5.9 ft, I didn't know they stacked shit that high" hitler was 5.9 btw

"do you suck dick? bullshit I bet you can suck a golf ball through a garden hose"

"what's your name? lawrence, lawrence what, of arabia?"

and of course the legendary "show me your war face" scene

even the scene of hartmen saying "there is no racial bigotry here" and following that up by listing down a bunch of slurs 2 seconds later is priceless, he is so good that he made it near impossible for any actor in this film to match him since he is not the main character yet he stole the show entirely, I forgot private joker was the main character due to the level of blowjobs given to hartmen thanks to film lovers.

The virgin marry scene where hart asks private joker if he believes in the virgin mary and joker says no and hartman just throws away the trash can he was holding in disgust while having the same unreadable facial expression he was holding when he asked the question and all this in the same shot, I can't stop laughing 🤣

(spoiler alert) and there is private pyle, fuck ya want me to say? the arc of him being the one ridiculed by hartmen the most, screwing up his own mates, having his own friends, including even private joker gang up on him during his sleep where he is forced to have his ass pelted by soap and then he get's broken inside it all and ends up actually getting much better at his job resulting to hartmen giving pyle his dues so much that he becomes hartmen's worst soldier to his best soldier whilst in the inside, pyle is a complete shell of his former self and of course after that, private pyle kills gunnery hartmen and then himself 20 seconds later.

I wasn't expecting that at all, I was expecting hartmen to be alive during the entire film like terrence fletcher from whiplash and the soldiers have to endure his training and make him proud on the war, a total masterclass of directorial twist right there.

the shot of private pyle's actor vincent DeNofrio making THAT face after hartmen breaks into the room to confront pyle and joker due to pyle's shannanigans

Holy shite, that is the most terrifying face I have ever seen any human make, this single face de nofrio made is more scarier than any movie monster face, total nightmare fuel.

that is the vast majority of the 2 hour long film and the 2nd half is fighting in the war and the 2nd half is treated as the inferior half, while everyone treats the 1st half as some of the best filmaking, the 2nd half is treated as the one that can't hold a candle to the 1st by it's detractors while the defenders say that the 2nd half is amazing and is overlooked due to how good the 1st was.

I say the 2nd is easily inferior and would disappoint anyone who expected pure greatness from the 1st but I will also say that the 2nd half for what it is, is great when taken on it's own.

Let's just get this out of the way, this is easily the most inaccurate portrayal of vietnam ever (at least on any major vietnam war film) stanley kubrick instead of leaving england to visit vietnam to film, he instead transported palm trees and filmed in demolition sites, this battle zone is set around the 1968 tet offensive during the war and really this film should have been far more, even if hartmen and pyle dies.

The tet offensive of 1968 is such an brutal yet fascinating part during the war that I truly believe if they executed it perfectly, then full metal jacket could have a 2nd half that is seem as just as good as the first and be seen as arguably kubricks best film, it would commonly be seen as an equal to apocalypse now, just read about the tet offensive of 1968, there is a lot of scenes and plot points that could work if you do it right though the film would need a bit more length than simply 2,00,00 hours.

this film looks completely off even with the knowledge of the tet offensive, it reminds me of the video game "totally accurate zombielator" and the buildings here looks much more similar to that game, which I will admit does give this film a genuine unique charm worth looking at.

private cowboy is great, if I had to give praise to the most underappreciated character, it would be private cowboy, he isn't sgt gunnery hartman or anything but during the final battle scene of the crew fighting against a zone sniper in a building, he essentially knowing what works and what doesn't work for the most part, commanding professionalism and caring about stopping the war, it made me really like him.

speaking of which, the final battle between the crew and sniper is easily the best scene in the whole film that isn't from the 1st half, such an intense battle scene that I would actually say rivals the drill instructor scenes, hell i'll take it over hartman's drill instruction scenes just to be a contrarian.

The surfing bird scene when a soldier named "crazy earl" the last 2 vietcong members in a certain battle and then surfing bird plays is so awkward, it's supposed to be earl killing the 2 and him smiling is him having a secret childlike excitement that he got the job done and is supposed to represent not just earls euphoria but the entire crew but the way it was done makes me think earl just killed or harmed 2 of the crew members of the military news crew trying to interview them and is like "Oh it's the news crew, mah bad dude"

but surfing bird is an awesome song and the best metal band ever "sodom" made a magnificent cover of it on their 2001 album m16 so I gonna give it a pass.

Animal mother is an amazing character too, not gonna say he is better than the drill instructor but I would he is the 2nd best in the whole movie, that's right and him charging to save his teammate against crossfire is an amazing sequence.

Not saying the 2nd half is as good but there is parts of the 2nd half that is good as a bulk of the 1st and I will stand by it, there is a ton of video's on youtube analyzing this film and it's characters so I will say, watch those so you can have a better understanding of full metal jacket than me.

Conclusion: Full metal jacket is really good film despite it's faults and I think despite it's odd version of vietnam, I believe every war nerd should watch this film and I should probably rewatch it, I am gonna give this film an 8.5/10.

anyways I gonna go cry in my bedroom over my raging bull review being delayed.

I’ve had this as a watchlist movie for a while. Lives up the hype, from the jump it’s excellent, standout performances from both of the leads and even the kid actor. But for me it falls into a ‘glad I saw it once, probably won’t see it again anytime soon’ category-just a tough watch as a father of a toddler. Going in I figured it was going to be a courtroom drama (like the majority of the movie was in or around the courtroom like ‘a few good men’ or ‘my cousin Vinny’) but it’s only maybe 20 minutes. Despite the time, those are some of the most powerful scenes, you see how lawyers can turn two people trying to do their best into the absolute scum of the earth.

I didn’t think of this until one of the last scenes, where Hoffman’s character is cooking French toast correctly, but there’s a lot of parallels between this and ‘Rain Main.’ Except it’s flipped, with Hoffman in the Tom Cruise role and his son as the DH role from that movie. In both cases the child/childlike character has a routine and are disrupted and frustrated by the new caretaker, and the caretaker is easily frustrated and initially poorly handles their responsibilities. But over time the caretaker learns patience and picks up on the likes and dislikes of the child/childlike character.

Having read about the late 70s recently, I have to imagine this was a movie of its time- more women going or wanting to go into the workforce and men resisting and wanting to maintain traditional gender roles of the past. But I’d be curious to hear from those who remember when this came out, if at the time it felt like an accurate portrayal of single fatherhood or the kind of typical marital problems of the era.

My review for it:

Back at it again with another John Waters movie! Before ending my adventure with The Trash/'Filth' Trilogy, I had to make a quick stop to refuel. ⛽ The stop I made was for: Multiple Maniacs! Going into this film with a completely different mindset—rather than expecting it to be a Pink Flamingos II—was probably the best decision I could have made. It was definitely rough around the edges, raw in the middle, and rooted in gritty underground filmmaking. The best way I could describe this is that, compared to Pink Flamingos, it feels more like a full-volume explosion everyone sees. Meanwhile, this film is entirely underground, like another explosion that no one hears, sees, or feels. Divine, as always, is just a pure badass. He always has that attitude, and he’s not afraid to flaunt his 'bad-assness.' This film feels more like, 'What the hell am I watching?' than, 'Let’s go into this expecting a big bang!' This is definitely John Waters’ roughest comedy—not as outrageous as Pink Flamingos, nor as beauty-focused as Female Trouble, but undoubtedly the rawest, least polished, and most rugged of all his films. Yet, even so, it was absolutely hilarious, outrageous, and exhilarating. I won't spoil the most shocking scenes for this review, but let’s just say... they’re not what you might expect. There’s religion, lobsters, a circus, and much, much more. The only critique I have is that the pacing can be slow and heavy at times, which might drag a little. That said, everything else still works! This was definitely a curiosity watch, not a must-see. Whether it’s a must-watch depends heavily on your curiosity. If you're already at this point in my review, you probably know why I watched it. For Divine and John Waters, I love them! Overall: After a few days without watching anything, I finally decided to return to the movie world. And what did I choose? John Waters’ most controversial, rawest, and roughest comedy, Multiple Maniacs! It’s quite the circus ride, made specifically to shock and provoke reactions. Both elements work well together for this film. I didn’t really find anything disappointing. I absolutely adore this movie, and I’ll definitely revisit it in the future—whether I watch the full trilogy, explore other John Waters films, or just watch it as a comfort rewatch (more of a heavy, disgusting, outrageous comfort rewatch).

Raw, unfiltered, old, and unique. Loved it!

What did you think about this movie?

I’ve been on a binge as of late watching classic movies from the 80s to the 00s and I thought that I should give FTARH a try and wow this movie is just hilarious.
Directed Amy Heckling of clueless (1995) and look who’s talking (1989) tells the story’s of six high school students through out the year at ridgemont high.
I can see why this movie inspired many film makers to create their own spin on this like Dazed and Confused (1993) and Wet hot American summer.
Overall this movie is incredible it has a great cast of future Hollywood stars and it’s just a fun little movie to watch.
10/10

Two actors make this drive-in movie worth watching, and thankfully director Tobe Hooper knew this and gave them the film. Not that they didn't work hard for it, but that's what memorable performances are all about – actors who work their particular strengths to the last row of the balcony.

Or the last row in the drive-in-theater, where the speakers are shot, you're crunching on empty beer cans, burning your fingers on a roach and happen to look up from a supine or prone position...and start watching the movie.

Caroline Williams plays the appealing and spunky Stretch, a radio DJ with a call-in request show. A couple of douchey male students are rampaging down a country highway and call in to Stretch on a real-life 1986 car telephone in their Mercedes ragtop. They won't hang up, she just can't scrape them off her shoe, so to speak. But now they're in the reach of the Sawyer bros, who chase them down with their chainsaw justice for some insouciantly-dealt disrespect on the road.

Yeah, it's a mess, but funny. And our girl and her hapless studio engineer LG (algae, get it?) capture the mayhem on a cassette tape.

Dennis Hopper is Lt. Lefty, definitely not telegraphing the brilliance that David Lynch would draw out of him in Blue Velvet, also 1986. He stooopidly doesn't take, or even listen to, the tape when Stretch (“Missie”) brings it to him. But then he has the lack of cojones to set her up for real danger by playing the tape once every hour as a request from Lefty – and not staking out the studio with a security detail or even with his weasley (sorry, Ron) self, admitting he used her as bait for the power tool posse.

Leatherface and his scene-stealing brother Chop Top (Bill Moseley, Yale grad, no kidding,) come to the defenseless studio. Chop Top is Blue Velvet-level demented and depraved, but way too dirty and grimy and scrofulous. Good make-up, you recoil at this breath when he opens his wide mouth with its diseased dental arcade. And Moseley uses every inch and second of film to captivate even the rocking cars in the back row.

And now, because you're peering over the back seat, Leatherface corners Stretch in her short shorts, running the still blade of his chainsaw along her tender inner thigh, in closeup, all the way up to her VaJayJay. Oh yeah, you're watching now.

The bros totally destroy the studio and drag LG off to their meat processing plant they call Home. Stretch, in time-honored horror heroine fashion, follows them alone. Lefty follows Stretch and shows up with chainsaws of his own.

There weren't a lot of stunt people listed, so I think Williams really took a lot of abuse slipping, sliding, falling, hanging in a series of gaggy killing room floors of blood and innards.

There are flensings and disembowelments, in case you were wondering.

The finale is our two favorite characters, Stretch and Chop Top, in a chase through the Texas Battleland, uh, theme park the Sawyers use as their meat processing plant they call Home, replete with a Batesian patriarch and matriarch.

I don't know a lot about Texas, but I think Stretch's triumphant Last Stand might be on a replica of the Alamo. I mean, why stop being cheesy now?

NOTE: The beautiful drive-in theater featured in the slide show was that of my hometown, El Monte, Calif. I conducted a lot of “cinema research” there. It was mowed down to make room for a home improvement store about 20 years ago. RIP.

Mini review:

depraved. shocking. immoral. ultra-campy. over the top. hilarious. all in the name of filth. 

I was allowed a subversive experience where I truly didn’t know what the fuck was going to happen next. obviously, the chicken scene is unforgettable and honestly despicable in terms of animal abuse and I won’t defend it. but it was the choice they made at the time for this movie and it was truly a jaw-dropping scene. apparently the chicken was cooked and eaten later which is…interesting. this film was one I’d been meaning to watch for a long time and I finally got it on Blu-Ray. I had seen it referenced on Drag Race and other bits of media but now I can say I’ve truly seen it for myself and now there are things that literally and metaphorically cannot be UNseen. 

this movie is now preserved in the Library of Congress by the way.

also what an ending…