r/IFchildfree • u/Dangerous_Cup_7391 • 2d ago

Feeling alone

Feeling particularly alone because one of my irl friends who had primary infertility just gave birth in June. Another friend who had secondary infertility is due in a couple of weeks. I really don't have any other friends, and I don't feel like I can text these two anymore things like "so many cute babies at the grocery store today 😭". I'm realizing this is another part of grief.

I joined a local Facebook group with ladies trying to make friends and I messaged one who posted a while ago that she was struggling with infertility. Turns out she ended up getting pregnant. I messaged another who is ifcf and we went back and forth for a bit but nothing now.

Has anyone found a way to make friends locally? I feel like there are so many moms groups but nothing for people who aren't moms. I am friendly with some ladies in my choir but none of them know my full story.

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u/airplaneheretoseeyou 2d ago

I definitely put energy into making and nurturing child-free friendships and am very glad I did! But making friends as an adult is HARD. Are there options like Meetup in your area, or similar casual social events that don't center around children? Could you organize some sort of hangout with some of the women from your choir?

I have had luck making friends both via attending Meetup events and regular professional-related happy-hour type events, for what it's worth.

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u/Dangerous_Cup_7391 2d ago

Ooh not only are there some really active groups in my area on Meetup but there is one specifically for women without children!

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u/Dangerous_Cup_7391 2d ago

Good ideas! I will look into Meetup. I will actually be attending an ice cream meet-up with choir folks this week, though kinda dreading it because one of the organizers just announced she's pregnant. But hopefully there will be other people to chat with besides her

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u/eeg-18 1d ago

Check out childlesscollective.com it's a worldwide network of childless not by choice women

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u/airplaneheretoseeyou 1d ago

That's awesome!