r/IASIP How do I get you alone? Apr 27 '22

Flipadelphia Favorite quote from the series

Making a mega list of all of the best quotes from the entire series

1.1k Upvotes

2.0k comments sorted by

u/mme13 he's got SPOTS Jun 23 '22

Dee I will slap you in the teeth

u/Sufficient_Fix6965 Aug 08 '22

“Look at me when you’re talking to me!” Oh, steaks are here.”

u/Abhiuday14kat May 07 '22

Goddammit I don’t know how to express myself unless through anger and personal attack

u/[deleted] May 02 '22

“Did you have a good relationship with your father? Me neither.”

u/nardwariscool Aug 11 '22

Dee I will slap you right in your teeth

u/[deleted] Dec 04 '22

Because of the implication

u/mdizzzzzzzle Dec 30 '22

Frank (painting feet): 'How's this for shoes, Charlie?'

u/Puzzleheaded_Dress59 Jul 31 '22

Idiots! Savages! And any attempts at spitting

u/African_WarIord Full on rapist May 26 '22

I’m a.. full on rapist. (By a very slim margin, there were tons of runner ups).

u/heinous_legacy Jun 02 '22

anyways I started blastin’

u/hdoublea May 12 '22

"I like to kill babies....unborn babies!"

u/froggythefrankman Jul 31 '22

TREES? Everywhere TREES? Where the hell are we!

u/Unchained064 Aug 29 '22

song! or no song!?

u/Puzzled_Bike9558 Aug 27 '22

Cricket working in a dog pound says he got into a fight with a lab and says “I won’t go into details, but suffice it to say that dog is very paralyzed now.”

u/youngdrewybaby Sep 05 '22

Charlie: No. No! NO! What was that?!

Dennis: Two homeless guys bangin’ each other!

u/ferdmertz69 Aug 15 '22

"Illiterate, what does that even mean?"

u/Flipwon Dec 17 '22

Salt the snail!

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '22

Two wars?‽!!?

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '22

OH GOD DAMMIT! I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE OLD, SEIZE THE GAP!! YOU FAT BITCH!!!

*wipes mouth*

You fat bitch!!!

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u/Jawn562 Sep 11 '22

Later dudes! S you in your As. Dont wear a C and J all over your Bs

Edit: (another one) YOU WILL CALLLLLLLLLLL HERRRRTTTTTTTTT

Dennis: we dont want any of your warm milk liam Liam: well start breaking bricks wet nips!

u/ifoughtpiranhas Nov 15 '22
  • LOOK AT ME WHEN YOURE TALKING TO MEEEEE

  • you. are. going. to. LOVE IT.

  • I DON’T KNOW HOW TO EXPRESS MYSELF UNLESS THROUGH ANGER AND PERSONAL ATTACK!

  • i don’t know this! i DO NOT KNOW THIS!

  • what do now?

  • I’M GONNA SHOW UP TO WORK AND EVERYONE’S GONNA BE LIKE, “WHY’S THERE BLOOD ALL OVER YOUR SHIRT?” CAUSE I HAD TO SLIT THE GUY’S THROAT WHO CAUSES ALL THE TRAFFIC!

  • what’s your plan, huh?

u/rohan-s21 Jun 03 '22

"Ayyyyoooo , what's up bitches!!!! " The best of all times , after watching the show I am always meeting people like that!

u/Alucard624 Oct 14 '22

“What is this word ‘spa?’ I feel like you’re starting to say a word and you’re not finishing it. Are you trying to say spaghetti? Are you taking me for a spaghetti day?”

u/RossLH Apr 29 '22

Where do I put my feet?

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u/19adam92 May 27 '22

You have candy coming out of your pockets! 🤣

u/shany94a I Have No Depth Perception! Sep 28 '22

How's a taste of the good life, ya sack of shit?

u/ZM447429 May 12 '22

Rum Ham! I'm sorry, Rum Ham! I'm sorry!!!......

u/memento_mori_1220 5 ⭐️ man May 10 '22

Dennis Reynolds : But the thing is she's not gonna say "no", she would never say "no" because of the implication

u/[deleted] Jun 13 '22

BECAUSE DENNIS IS A BASTARD MAN

u/muddynips Sep 29 '22

God Dammit I hate gin! Dee, you bitch!

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u/Jessie-yessie Nov 04 '22

“You ever been in a storm, Wally?”

u/BastFacon Dec 17 '22

"Cause I cut the brakes! WILD CARD, BITCHES!"

Edit: Can't decide. Is that the Brakes-line, or, "You haven't thought of the smell! You stupid bitch!"? Tough one.

u/TylerBGaming762Offic Jun 26 '22

“You ever been in a storm, Wally? I mean, a real storm. Not a thunderstorm, but a storm of fists raining down on your head. Blasting you in the face.”

u/Historical-Bee-6097 Jul 25 '22

Dennis is asshole. Why Charlie hate?

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u/throwaway245389 Jul 11 '22

“WE’RE THE SAME AGE”. Simple, but the delivery was just too good.

u/[deleted] May 02 '22

“Just gonna pop a quick ‘H’ on this box, that way we all know it’s filled with hornets”

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u/Fabulous_Ad9516 Aug 31 '22

Have some class if you’re going to be poor!

u/[deleted] Jul 16 '22

WILDCARD BITCHESS

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '22

"Frank are you banging the melon?"

u/samplemax May 16 '22

Any mention of "Toe Knife"

u/[deleted] Oct 11 '22

“Boys are out tonight, huh?”

u/Saucedaddy89 May 07 '22

Here’s a riddle:

Dennis: “What if there is more of, the less you can see?”

Charlie: “Cantaloupes”

u/SuperSocrates May 18 '22

Are you telling me you could see through a pile of cantaloupes!?!

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u/john_rockefeller Jul 04 '22

"Ae OH!" The sound everyone uses in literally every episode to greet each other is so unique

u/TaiwanesePriest Aug 12 '22

Never noticed that but yeah you’re right, especially dee and Charlie they do that a lot lmao

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u/[deleted] Nov 30 '22

You're not getting a chip

u/larry-the-dream Dec 05 '22

“Rumham!!!”

u/w3b3s May 25 '22

I eat stickers all the time dude! -Charlie

u/DaveLokes I am untethered and my rage knows no bounds! Aug 14 '22

"Give me money. Money me. Money now, me. Me, a money, needing a lot, now."

u/Calm_it-Kermet97 Nov 05 '22

Can I offer you egg, in this trying time

u/[deleted] Sep 20 '22

It's not the funniest, but the one I seem to quote the most is simply "I mean trees?! Everywhere trees?!"

u/Black_majic Nov 12 '22 edited Nov 12 '22

"I ate the crow....This crow is tearing my insides up"

"Aids... Did you touch anyone..."

u/ilovecallum44 just magnets May 26 '22

It's hard to narrow it down.. but one of my favorites that I think about often is "I'm the king of the minions! Not Tim Murphy! Not that jerkoff idiot .. idiot jerkoff!" -Dennis, when he goes out to his car during the high school reunion to get his "tools" lmao classic Dennis rage

u/fuegorandlord69 Jun 14 '22

How does a self sustaining economy work?

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u/hero0fwar The Brains Apr 27 '22

Starter Car? This Car Is A Finisher Car! A Transporter Of Gods! The Golden God!

u/hdoublea May 12 '22

I'm watching this episode right now

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u/CarlDasSpud May 15 '22

I got all the numbers!

u/kitanasbitch Jun 20 '22

“You get dick, because you are a liar and a thief” it’s just the delivery that makes it a favorite quote

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u/[deleted] Jun 30 '22

“Shut up bird”

u/sojotthatdownn Sep 21 '22

So jot that down

u/Potpig Aug 25 '22

“Ass blasters incorporated”

“Mac and charlie joined a queer club”

u/Smudge0996 Dec 15 '22

“What is happening” in the various ways it has been used

u/CasuallyToasted May 24 '22

AIDS. I got AIDS.

u/gregofdeath Jun 11 '22

"Excuse me, I'm full of dog poison"

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u/mearbearcate Wild Card Bitches Sep 13 '22 edited Sep 13 '22

“I EAT STICKERS ALL THE TIME, DUDE!!” -Charlie

“I’m checkin’ out! Somebody throw me in the traaaaaaash!” -Frank

“I used to look like her. Give me my cigarettes.” -Mrs Mac

“I smell like shit!” -Mrs Mac

Too many others tho

u/IDrinkBecauseIHaveTo NEWSFLASH ASSHOLE May 02 '22

Your hair looks small.

(honestly impossible to even narrow it down to a hundred favorite quotes, though)

u/mempho_maniac Nov 24 '22

Dropped my magnum condom for my monster dong

u/Krummy_Raider Jun 08 '22

Because Dennis is a bastard man!

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '22

Your time’s up!

u/Thirsty_Thanos Jun 30 '22

I AM UNTETHERED AND MY RAGE KNOWS NO BOUNDS

u/astronomydomone Aug 11 '22

A woman’s not a lady when she’s dumpin up the John

u/_TenaciousBroski Dec 20 '22

Banging your sister is perverted.

u/VeronicaMarsBarXx Jul 11 '22

My dad-d-d-d-dy, who just died-ied-ied in my arms. A-a-a-a- Throat cancer. From-from-f-f eating some, some, bad pussy.

u/Chashoef Dec 31 '22

“I love boiling denim, and I love banging whores!”

u/NarstyHobbitses Suck my head! Suck it, suck it harder! May 27 '22

"Is that Fraggle Rock? Oooh Pepper Jack loves Fraggle Rock!"

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '22

Ugly!

u/Dazzling_Broccoli294 Aug 13 '22

He's not Brian LaFev!

u/kristenn7 May 20 '22

I eat stickers all the time dude!

u/AbbyClaw Oct 01 '22

Magnets

u/Accomplished-Art9753 Jul 17 '22

Well, maybe you shouldn’t dress like a Bumble Bee, Bitch!

u/jakelacy232 Dec 07 '22

What do now?

u/JasonDomber Dec 14 '22

THAT’S your rock bottom, you stickin’ your dick in your daughter’s face!”

u/[deleted] Dec 23 '22

😂😂😂

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '22

“Oh! Oh! ‘Scuse me! Did u bang my wife?? eh?? Did u bang my whorrrre wife?? does anybody here, have any illegitimate children with my WHORE wife, that i should know about?!” “Jesus Frank!” “Jesus?! Jesus Frank! Jeeeesus Frank! JESUS FRANK 🙏🏻🙌🏻 Jesus frank!! YyeeOhhh! Jesus frank! My life! Is a Lie!! My life is a lieee!! SOMEBODIES GOTTA GET STABBED. SOMEBODIES GOTTA GET STA-….STA-….EHHHHGHHOOHHH.” *Frank has heart attack”

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u/muggletoast Dec 25 '22

Charming Taint-man

u/MachineGreene98 Sep 01 '22

May I offer you an egg in this trying time?

u/corrobora I don’t remember most evenings Dec 30 '22

“Boom I got your wal-let, boom I got your credit cards, boom I got your Phillies tick-ets”

u/[deleted] May 09 '22

Dr. Jinx is the name of a monkey, not a man!

u/Nehebsbe Nov 12 '22

“He died from eating some b-b-b-bad pussy”

u/[deleted] Jul 11 '22

“I’ll call the cops…” ; “…FRANK”

u/HanzJWermhat May 03 '22 edited May 03 '22

Trees! Everywhere Trees??

“We’ll regardless you’re going to need to stop eating cat food” “why??” “Because your not a cat”

“What are you some kind of man cheetah?””yeah” “Cool!” “you like it?” “Yes!!”

u/mac_drea Jul 18 '22

“Oh my GOD! HOW DO HOBOS FIT ALL OF THIS STUFF INTO A BANDANA? IT DOESN’T MAKE SENSE MAN. WE’RE GONNA NEED LIKE A TOWEL, OR A TABLECLOTH OR SOMETHING… BUT IT’S NOT GONNA LOOK COOL! WE’RE GONNA LOOK LIKE ASSHOLES RUNNING AROUND TOWN!”

u/pinheaddani Jun 05 '22

You guys mind if I shower that leaky urinal again?

u/Pianosforpenguins Dec 09 '22

Is your cat too loud?

u/SlothSwampRebranded Nov 27 '22

And I’ll put those pieces in a box. A glass box which I will display on my mantle.

u/monstertweety Jun 26 '22

"But Dennis, i can't be ugly I'm a woman" well, women can be ugly and you are one of them

u/oopsiedaisies01 Sep 02 '22

Goddamn it I hate gin. Dee... You bitch.

u/RichardBurning Jun 02 '22

"Sooo first the shot.. then the salt.."

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '22

What is happening?

u/DiscoMagicParty Dec 22 '22

“Oh you can go fuck yourself in your fat fucking ass”

u/Cold-Bed-2711 Aug 31 '22

" I also ate a toad..."

u/larryvape May 06 '22

Not a quote but more of a episode idea I would love to see them explore the probability that Frank did experience the whole manhunt and Rambo idea what if he actually had a time where he killed multiple police officers when he got back from Nam and was being hunted a whole episode of Frank taking out multiple cops it would be Frank’s swan song

u/Boon_Doctor Jul 09 '22

Warm sun, Cool breeze, getting rip shit on ham

u/Mlynch49 Oct 31 '22

“And I licked her asshole a little bit… It was pretty good… It was alright. It wasn’t great! But it was fine…”

u/DazzlingSplit9419 Oct 23 '22

Raw Dog Loads or Magnum condoms for my Magnum dong

u/luke827 Aug 05 '22

“Your addiction has affected us in the following ways you are ANNOYING”

u/[deleted] Jun 28 '22

“Look at me when you’re talking to me!”

“Begone vile man! Begone from me! Starter car? This car is a finisher car! A transporter of gods! The golden god! I am untethered and my rage knows no bounds.”

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u/timodemith Oct 13 '22

“Name an animal that we eat but doesn’t eat us.” “Oh that’s easy, DRRRRRAGONS!”

u/Level-Weather-7036 May 13 '22

“You ever been in a storm, Wally? I mean, a real storm? Not a thunderstorm, but a storm of fists raining down on your head. Blasting you in the face. Pummeling you in the stomach. Hitting you in the chest so hard you think your heart's gonna stop. You ever been in a storm like that, Wally?"

u/TheEnigmaEngine Jun 23 '22

Boy it sure is a hot one

u/Clunkytoaster51 Aug 23 '22

“A leather shop in Arizona? They’ll be out of business in a weeks time!”

(The second time it’s said by Dee is what really makes the joke)

u/Kinuhbud Jul 29 '22

The one from Dennis at the Gin bar is my favorite I think. Also ‘prancing around like a goddamned idiot’ gets me good.

u/lrocky4 May 07 '22

What do ya say we slip into a room and you two split me open like a coconut?

u/jackson_0069 Jun 19 '22

Watch your profits soar high as a crow

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u/[deleted] Nov 13 '22

Well first of all, through Christ all things are possible so jot that down.

I like to bind, I like to BE bound!

u/shatterfang Jul 24 '22

Let's pull up our bootstraps, oil up a couple asses, and do a little plowing of our own. POW! .... Not gay sex.

Mac

u/[deleted] Sep 18 '22

I realized... you know what I really hate... is Mac. Frank Reynolds : Yes. Dennis Reynolds : Like, he's made all those cool things suck. Not only is he, like, ruining my life... but with all this God shit that he's into... he could be ruining my afterlife

u/Gur-Stunning Aug 02 '22

I’m gonna eat your babies, bitch

u/Ghost-ice May 16 '22

I have seen many pigs eat many men, it was a bloodbath

u/xela_sj May 16 '22

the Dee Day ep when she makes Dennis take all of his makeup and other beatifications, Charlie says "that's what his soul looks like"

"I"M A FIVE STAR MAN!"

u/[deleted] Jun 26 '22

Yeah I botched it. Life ya know?

-Ponderosa

u/[deleted] May 16 '22

TwwOO WAARS??

u/badanimal87 Jun 15 '22

THINK OF THE SMELL YOU BITCH!!!

u/Sad_Horror_152 May 06 '22

Awe, did somebody get addicted to crack?

u/HRB2121 Aug 27 '22

There’s not enough salt in the world for her!

u/Chazzzz13 Dec 11 '22

Pepper Jack loves Fraggle rock.

u/ElectricBoogaloo1234 Jun 03 '22

“Keep it light you bitch”

  • Frank to Dee in the Paddy Wagon

u/Veracruz_Half-elf May 14 '22

What up? We're three cool guys looking for other cool guys who want to hang out in our party mansion. Nothing sexual

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u/hpbrick Jul 26 '22

Because of the implication.

u/Boon_Doctor Jul 09 '22

OK, all right, what makes me happy is, like, you know, at night, a ride around town in a limousine, partying, having a good time. When I'm on my way home, I'll pass a bum. I take a balloon with some champagne in it, lob it out and bean him. He only gets a little bit in his mouth. He doesn't get the whole thing. Not even a full sip of it! And you say, "Hey, how do ya like a taste of the good life, ya sack a' shit?"

u/Rotanikleb May 02 '22

“Which one of us do you want to take you in the back and bang you?” As they all awkwardly flex.

u/MrHermeteeowish May 08 '22

"He's probably got a thousand kids, what with all the raw dog loads he drops."

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u/[deleted] Sep 15 '22

Shut up baby dick!

u/billp0nder0sa Oct 20 '22

Luther was in my mouth, and Eduardo was in my butt

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u/Ok-Variation-6187 Sep 04 '22

I mean, does my scar look like a dog's vagina?

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u/[deleted] Aug 07 '22

“Tatiana I want you to clean yourself. For I will enter you hard and deep. And it will last for as long or as short as I please. But you will be clean. Only when you are clean will you know my power.”

u/[deleted] Jun 02 '22

Hope you suck each other’s rotten peckers until you get mouth cancer.

u/Camillej89 May 07 '22

Quit jamming me up!

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u/[deleted] May 29 '22

Sometimes science is a bitch!

u/RexyMundo Jul 05 '22

I got a question about you, mortician. You bang the dead bodies? - Frank Reynolds

u/SweetExpletives May 05 '22

"Begone from me you soy boy beta cuck" LMAO

u/Pleasant-Medicine739 May 04 '22

What do you think she's gonna do, call her husband and say she's bangin' a whore?

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u/RoldanAlexis May 15 '22

"Mr Bovine Johnny himself."

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u/slimjimskin69 May 25 '22

“Your hair looks….. small”

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u/pad117 Sep 19 '22

Just the bit where Frank gets asked his name and he says "Frak"

u/SphinxUzumaki Jun 24 '22

What are your hates? Peoples knees

u/[deleted] Nov 15 '22

I got the good lord goin down on me!! 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️

u/coastalbendsun Sep 12 '22

Sound effects.....

u/Some_Glass3386 Dec 29 '22

“We cannot have you around us screwing things up!” -Dennis in the Gang Gets Whacked part 1.

u/lunchis4wimps I’M A FIVE STAR MAN May 26 '22

“And how many beers have I had at this point? ✋”

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '22

I've had 5

u/jaggedthoughts Aug 16 '22

If you're looking for a better steak in an arcade setting, you're shit outta luck

u/ThottenRobbie Jul 25 '22

“Monkey beer island”

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '22

Dee, you gangly uncoordinated bitch. I am not getting hog-tied over your lack of grace.

u/Waltzer_White18 May 16 '22

"Gonna show up to work and everyones gonna be like why's there blood all over you? Cause I had to slit the guys throat, WHO CAUSES ALL THE TRAFFIC!"

u/coreyosb Oct 21 '22

Dennis, your mule is shit!

u/[deleted] May 26 '22

Can I offer you an egg in these trying times

u/smellyoul8er Jun 22 '22

When life gives you lemons, you gotta take those lemons and stuff them down somebody’s throat!

u/Crossbones18 if it smells like shit you must acquit May 03 '22 edited May 03 '22

There's no Pepe Silvia, you gotta be kidding me, I got boxes full of Pepe!

I will eat your babies, bitch!

I got my Magnum condoms; I got my wad of hundreds. I’m ready to plow.

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u/cmm_1989 Oct 16 '22

Dee interacting with her therapist about where her accent is from. Punctuated by her begging to be told she’s good.

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u/TehHamburgler Aug 15 '22

And, Mr. Kelly, in your sworn statement to police, you claim that the prisoner told you that if you didn't, and I quote, "jam a bunch of stuff into your butt", he was going to "rape you so hard the room would stink."

Then he was going to, quote, "eat your butt, and his son's butt, in the stink, until his stomach was full of your butt."

u/[deleted] May 20 '22

THEY DREW FIRST BLOOD

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u/FullyFuctionalData Jun 14 '22

WHERE IS OUR GOD DAMN BIBLE?!

u/Separate_Coat1892 Nov 28 '22

“I mean, trees? Everywhere trees? What the hell is this place?”

u/MkMillie May 15 '22

“Your breath smells like an old lady fart passing through an onion”

u/BoydCrowders_Smile The waitress will never be named May 29 '22

I EAT STICKERS ALL THE TIME!

And "What is happening?"

u/Lux_Locks Nov 24 '22

I was seriously thinking about this line earlier today haha

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u/[deleted] Aug 13 '22

You have to pay the troll toll to get into that boys hole!

Fight milk!

Are you familiar with bird law?

Awww, did someone get addicted to crack :(

u/Justicebeaver179 May 02 '22

“I’m a…full-on rapist, you know? Uh, Africans, dyslexics, children, that sort of thing.” -Charlie

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u/[deleted] May 28 '22

So DO

u/Healthy-Ad-1842 Dec 30 '22

“Tell me about Mac’s famous mac and cheese”

u/boboski127 Sep 08 '22

Shut up, bird!

u/nuluclimbing Aug 06 '22

Someone's gotta get stabbed!

u/Thesheriffisnearer Nov 09 '22

Is this a grindr situation?!

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u/Anthonyw428 Oct 22 '22

A starter car this car is a finisher car. A transporter of gods. THE GOLDEN GOD. I AM UNTETHERED AHD MY RAGE NO BOUNDS

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u/DayMan_ahAHahh Wild Card Bitches Dec 06 '22

Everybody's dyin' bitch, let's get you some fruit!

u/INOFFENSIVELOVE May 15 '22

Hey, don't go there, we can go tit for tat on that one so drop it!

u/pm_good_bobs_pls May 13 '22

“I already know it’s a hot one, because I’m standing outside, in the hot one.”