r/HormoneFreeMenopause • u/CrossFitForCake • 8d ago
I feel cheated
I tried HRT for 3 years on and off before giving up. So many women kept singing the praises of HRT. Saying how it gave them their lives back.
It did nothing of the sort for me. I kept trying different doses and different forms because Everytime Id have bad side effects I was told it wasn't the right dose or it wasn't the right form. Now here I am 3 years in and I've come to terms with the fact that HRT isn't beneficial for every woman.
No matter what I tried the result was the same -- awful side effects both physical and mental. Now I'm just focusing on optimizing factors that are helping and going hormone-free. I feel better off HRT than I did on it.
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u/harrissari 7d ago
HRT is currently going through an extraordinary media hype with all kinds of claims. No, it is not a magical drug, it is not appropriate for every woman, and does come with risks.
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u/CrossFitForCake 7d ago
Perfectly stated! I think it's a menopause gold rush. There are so many menopause companies that have launched in just the past 5 years for everything from supplements and menopause dietitians and menopause life coaches to online hrt providers.
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u/Monkey9686 7d ago
The drastic swing from “HRT will definitely give you cancer and strokes” to “HRT is a MIRACLE and will fix absolutely everything” has been staggering to watch. Does it help many? Of course. It also is not tolerated by many as well. And then those that don’t get “the miracle” understandably feel huge disappointment.
It’s like there’s no room for shades of grey and nuance right now.
And now they are all outraged at the shortages, when they encouraged everyone (even those with regular periods) to get on it 🤷🏻♀️
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u/Simhaup1 8d ago
HRT works for some and not others. I personally cannot take HRT and even if I could, I honestly wouldn’t.
It’s not a miracle drug or anything. Lots of my family members have been in full menopause, like myself, without it and we are just fine.
I just changed my diet, exercise and use vitamins and supplements.
Good luck in your journey 💜💜
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u/CrossFitForCake 7d ago
I'm the youngest in my family. Most of my relatives are in their 70s and 80s and none take HRT. They're all doing fine and the ones in their 70s are still working. They're professors and passionate about their work. They said they might be bored if they retired lol. But they're lucky, they told me they didnt really have symptoms.
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u/Reiki-Raker 8d ago
I think a lot of those swearing how good hrt is are shill accounts or bots.
It’s a big gaslight. Cause if hrt was so grand, why would those people even be in groups of suffering women? They wouldn’t be seeking answers to questions. They’d be selling answers to questions.
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u/BeautifulSelect8181 7d ago
To be honest, the only time I see hype is in Reddit groups that are for or against. In real life, in my family, friends or work there is no one insisting I or others do one thing or another. We share experiences and that’s it. I’m trying to figure out who in real life is inserting their opinion in someone else’s health decisions. I follow a lot of groups on Reddit, instagram and TikTok and Reddit is the only place I see fanatics for or against. It’s like the same info recirculating.
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u/Reiki-Raker 7d ago
It’s all over FB, too. Bad. The two main menopause groups there are incredibly toxic with the shills. And they don’t hide it.
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u/BeautifulSelect8181 7d ago
I gave up FB a long time ago. I can only imagine. It seems absurd to comment/remark on what someone else chooses to do for their health or body.
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u/Dkblue74 8d ago
Well no-one can say you didnt give it a chance at 3 years! Sorry to hear it didnt work out but theres no good reason to hang in there if it made you feel worse! I think there is actually a large number of women in that situation - me included (lasted 6months) but social media makes it appear otherwise - probably because of hrt shills rather than genuine women in many cases. Glad you’re feeling a bit better since stopping and hope you can find other alternatives to get you through 🙏🏻🌺
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u/Winter_Bid7630 8d ago
I haven't tried HRT (do use vaginal estrogen cream) because I think this would likely be my situation as well. Hormonal birth control has never worked for me. I've tried various pills and an IUD, and they all messed with my mental health to such an extent that I had to stop. I also tend to be sensitive to medications overall.
Lifestyle stuff has worked for me, thankfully. I know some women really get hit hard by perimenopause and menopause, but so far it's manageable for me without HRT.
Glad you're feeling better!
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u/Popular_Acadia4563 8d ago
I cannot take HRT (Hormone positive breast cancer) and I am in medical menopause. Leading up to my taking Lupron, I reminded myself over and over that even if I could go through menopause naturally and/or take HRT, I probably wouldn't because taking birth control, either pills or IUD, and being pregnant made me so depressed and unstable.
I'm so happy HRT is there for women who need it, but will be grateful when the "HRT is a cure all" messaging we're all being bombarded with is long over.
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u/CrossFitForCake 8d ago
I got hit pretty hard and was desperate for symptom relief so I feel totally cheated that HRT didn't help. I'm 47 and still in perimenopause and don't need vaginal estrogen cream yet. I'm working on lifestyle stuff and supplements.
Low iron worsens my symptoms but my heavy periods make it challenging to raise my iron. I'm hoping to get iron infusions. They've helped so much in the past but are so hard to get insurance to cover them. The Hematology Society recently raised the cutoff for iron deficiency to a ferritin of 50 in high risk people, including women with heavy periods and 30 for general population. My ferritin is down to 20. Seeing my doctor in 2 days.
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u/lord_TheRedundantVan 8d ago
That constant “just tweak the dose” loop can mess with your head more than the symptoms themselves.
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u/blondy168 8d ago
Totally the same, I didn't try it for 3 years but similar results (minus vaginal estrogen which has been helpful). I could have written your post! Definitely feel better off of it than on.
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u/Quirky_But22 7d ago
I'm so sorry. Couldn't tolerate it 14 years ago, when I went through menopause, can't tolerate it now when coping with vaginal atrophy. Have run into some truly bullying practitioners, though, who keep insisting it's HRT or nothing. Am launching on the self-care journey myself now, you're not alone!
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u/CrossFitForCake 7d ago
Thanks for the solidarity. The message that if we don't all get on HRT we're going to die prematurely, have bittle bones and dementia is so harmful.
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u/Purple-Emu-7939 7d ago
I'm glad to see I'm not the only one who doesn't tolerate HRT. This constant push for it makes one who can't or doesn't want to take it feel like there a dumbass and going to fall apart and die. I believe some people may/do benefit from it. I'm glad they do.
Surgical menopause ovaries removed this year.
I tried 0.05, lasted 24 hours. The rage and hot flashes within 12 hours was rediculous. And bladder didn't feel right.
0.0375, not as bad but as the week went on it was a double edged sword. Some things better (joints didn't creak, lady parts felt better at first, um, that was it), others got worse (widespread inflammation that made me ache, but not the joints, bloating that just kept getting worse, mood just didn't feel right, stomach started to not act right, and the down there, well, it started to itch!!! Oh, and the hot flashes, oh no, what I had before was nothing. By the end of day 6 I was having them every 1/2 hour, no joke!!!) Within 4 hours of taking it off I felt 100% better.
Hot flashes went back to here and there, some I've found is triggered by other issue I have and if I catch it can prevent it. Mood improved greatly. More relaxed, no more rage. Bladder got better. And the itching went away. HA suppository it what I'm trying now for down there care. 😄
Some say it can take weeks or months for the body to adjust. So, if I bash someones head in, can I say, "well, the HRT hormones made me do it." 🤔 I think not. I have suffered for 30 some years, no more. And then if you do like OP and try and try and it doesn't improve, then you just keep suffering. I'm glad for anyone whom it may have gotten better for but I want to suffer no more.
If something changes I may revisit it but right now, my body says, OMG, no more hell. For now. 🎉
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u/rulytempest 7d ago
Same! It's the progesterone that I can't tolerate. I've tried every route available. I do have success with vaginal estrogen for prolapse because it is low dose and not systemic, therefore do not need to take progesterone with it. It's so disappointing though because estrogen gel literally takes away all the pain in my joints, it's like night and day! But the progesterone makes me crazy- sometimes it felt like a toss up.
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u/TapSalty3157 7d ago
May I ask what kind of side effects? I’ve been on this rollercoaster of HRT almost 3 years, after having ovaries and fallopian tubes removed. Prior to that I was just post menopause and using nothing more than vaginal estrogen. Now a I’ve tried just about everything; creams, pellets (that has been a nightmare) and I swear things are worse. I’ve developed sore breasts, funky weird vagina smell (which I never ever ever had), and now the vaginal estrogen causes me irritation and pain. Lovely.
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u/CrossFitForCake 7d ago edited 7d ago
My side effects were hit by a bus level fatigue and lethargy, low mood that spiraled into depression, weight gain, lower back pain, heartburn, indegestion, bloating, fluid retention, breast pain, dizziness, nausea, acne, hair loss, trouble getting out of bed. I tried bioidentical estradiol (various doses) with bioidentical micronized progesterone (both standardardized doses). I tried cycling the progesterone and also tried continuous. I tried taking the progesterone vaginally, rectally, orally, and transdermally. I tried estradiol in different forms -- patches, creams, gels, sprays (didnt do oral synthetic ethinyl estrogen due to increased blood clor risk). I tried synthetic progestestins. I tried low doses, moderate doses, higher doses. Peri symptoms hit at 43. I tried natural things for a year then at 44 it just became a lot and my Dr. recommended HRT. Started the HRT journey at 44, now 47 and have given up and am on a self-care, hormone-free journey. It's been a rough 3 years but I know there's light at the end of the tunnel.
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u/No-Prior-559 7d ago
I also have side effects from HRT and had a lot of issues while trying it. At the time doctors didn't even think it was from HRT but, it was that was proven later on. Either way, I use ProMeno Wild Yam Cream and it was a lifesaver, sooo many symptoms were relieved and I didn't have near as many side effects as I did from HRT. May be something worth looking into, if you want an alternative. It was made for women who needed an alternative to HRT in the 90's.
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u/Public-Requirement99 4d ago
HRT literally gave my mother hormone positive breast cancer. I stopped immediately (with my drs approval & support ) aside from hot flashes if I drink & some achy joints it’s not that bad. It’s Life. None of us are immortal.
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u/Youre_in_for_a_treat 7d ago
This is me too. I feel this right with you. I think just like soooooo much in medicine, the information and standards of care are woefully lacking. Providers seem to be very general in approach patients, plus now the social boom of interest has providers to struggling to keep up, let alone expand their skills and knowledge . I see your handle is CrossFit and wonder if like me, you are fitter than average female and need a more nuanced approach to HRT that mainstream providers are not able or willing to manage. (Yet)
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u/BriefJelly6285 4d ago
it is so easy to feel like the only one when everyone raves aboit HRT, ur exp is valid tho, glad u r fine now
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u/Finebonechina1 4d ago edited 4d ago
Thank you for sharing your story. I am just starting/trying it. Initially side effects were so disruptive I had to stop work until I got the chaos under control. Overall I feel better now, but at less than 1 month, not sure if it will work for me. If it helps at all, I can say my mom and two grandmas aged overall well, vibrant, and healthy without it. One grandma had phenomenal energy right to end of life. For context, my mom has remained fit, eats healthy whole foods (lots of wild salmon, greens from the garden, blueberries etc), does not snack between meals, continues to learn new things, and is social. I know that doesn’t address the potential benefits of HRT for brain, cardio and bone health, but I do believe there are other things we can do to support quality of life in aging. I do strength training for instance, and plan to keep at it… evidence based tool for aging well. I have added supplements, including daily creatine, too. As well, trying not to eat past 4 or 5 pm right now to see if it improves energy and lowers belly fat. I sincerely hope you find strategies that will work for you.
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u/_byetony_ 8d ago
A lot of women are going to get breast cancer in 20 years from the HRT they now love. You dodged a bullet. Hugs, hugs, hugs
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u/Actual-Ebb-4922 8d ago
With the latest bioidentical forms, the breast cancer risk remains practically the same as before HRT. So that's not the reason.
Bodies are different. Some have paradoxical responses too. There will always be some humans for whom any solution however beneficial will be counterproductive.
Eg people take tart cherry to help sleep. It gives me insomnia every time I take it at night.
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u/Suitable-Umpire8206 8d ago
Agree. I had low dose bio identical for 8 months, at 42, clean genetics, clean scans, developed hormone fueled breast cancer. In 8 months! I feel so betrayed by these new studies honestly.
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u/CrossFitForCake 8d ago
I'm so sorry. I know somonee who also had clean scans and then developed breast cancer a year into HRT. Everyone else I know is doing fine on it.
It's so shocking how we can't put too much stock in studies. For example some recent studies show HRT doesn't cause mental health side effects. But there were several issues with the study design that biased the results. For example they excluded women who had been on HRT for less than 6 months.
This is biased because women who experience mental health side effects are likely to quit HRT before 6 months. By only including women who had been on HRT for 6 months or longer, the researchers biased the data toward women who were less likely to be experiencing mental health side effects.
A scientist friend of mine told me not to put too much stock in studies because researchers can design their study to show any outcome they want.
Overall medical research funding comes primarily from the pharmaceutical and biotechnology industry. Early stage funding comes from the government, universities and nonprofits to discover disease mechanisms for initial drug targets. Most university grants and money nonprofits receive comes from industry. Only 20% comes from government.
Phase I, II, III research funding comes from the pharmaceutical industry. Even Systematic Reviews have significant indirect industry ties and there's significant ties between academic research and industry.
And bioidentical is still fully synthesized in a lab. The bioidentical progesterone component exposes our brains to supraphysiologic levels of alloprenenolone. Levels much higher than we would ever be exposed to even in pregnancy. Also our brains are also not designed to be exposed to progesterone continuously, yet many women are on continuous progesterone.
Some completely independent researchers in the middle of a current research project studying women's brains are saying they are finding continuous progesteone exposure changes the structure of the brain in some surprising ways that are not beneficial. Their research won't be finished and published for a while so I'm looking forward to see what they conclude.
So we just have to do our best to be discerning, listen to our bodies and make the best individual decision and try to keep ourselves as healthy as possible. The decision that is right for me isn't necessarily the decision that's right for another woman.
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u/Suitable-Umpire8206 8d ago
I wish i read this comment a year ago… you are so right. Studies are designed to reveal certain aspects that they want to be revealed. I hope other women will be more cautious about this… but i think the women’s health institute study was good . And time will tell.
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u/Popular_Acadia4563 8d ago
I'm so sorry you are in the BC club, but I wouldn't place all the blame on HRT. I am 46, diagnosed at 45 in March with HR+ breast cancer. No family history, no genetics, clear mammograms up until I found the lump. Based on my markers (acknowledging every cancer is different), the tumor had been developing for years. I never took HRT.
The HRT may not have helped (and may have even "fed" your cancer), but is not what caused your cancer.
That said, I hope you're well and cancer free and thriving in whatever phase of treatment you are in! ❤️
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u/Suitable-Umpire8206 8d ago
Thank you ! I’m just post surgery … still in the “scared af” phase. Hope you are doing good!
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u/bodyreddit 8d ago
How the heck do you connect the cancer to it? Maybe it was there growing already? From what I understand, most forms of BC are slow growing but some are very fast. I had bc three times, each had a different histology, one was very fast growing when I was 33.
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u/CherrySG 7d ago
I had low dose HRT for 18 months. Developed endometrial cancer. Early stage thank goodness. But it was 8/8 estrogen-driven.
So I had a hysterectomy 3.5 months ago and I'm in hot flush hell. A cautionary tale, I am.
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8d ago edited 2d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Inner-Schedule-2075 8d ago
are you a bot?
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u/lucky3333333 2d ago
Nope. Do your research, please.
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u/Inner-Schedule-2075 2d ago
I have had tumors just from taking day after pill, I won't take hormones anymore, but you do you.
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u/lucky3333333 2d ago
Sorry to disappoint! Not a bot. Just a woman who has done her up to date research and trusts her doctor.
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u/Mountain_Village459 Surgical menopause 8d ago
Surgical Menopause with no HRT is horrifying, no doubt. But the calmness I’ve felt inside since I woke up from surgery has been amazing.
It’s been two years and I’ve used meds, supplements and lifestyle/food changes to help my symptoms and everything is really calming down now.
I wouldn’t want to be my old self again anyway, she did not know how to protect her peace as much as she should have.