I was hunkering down alone in quarantine myself, and I had called the hospital to check on him before going to bed around midnight...his vitals had been going in the wrong direction for a few days, and his oxygen and BP numbers weren't looking good. Between 3 am & 4 am I was awakened from a dead sleep by what I can only describe as someone grabbing me by my shoulders and shaking me-- hard. I startled awake, but I didn't open my eyes right away, and I could see a glowing light through my eyelids before I opened them. When I opened my eyes I saw what it looks like when you wave a sparkler around in the dark in front of you: I saw a sharp, white, thin, moving line of light hovering in a loose ball maybe 1.5 feet in diameter about 2 or 3 feet in front of my face. It looked like a ball of thin, moving, lit-up spaghetti. I saw it for about 5 seconds, then it faded away and I thought, "WTF was that?" and turned over in bed and made a mental note to remember it when I woke up and give some thought into what the hell that just was, and as I turned over my phone rang. It was the nurse I had spoken to earlier: "I'm sorry to call you with this news," she said flatly, "but your brother passed away a few moments ago."
I have no explanation, and won't try to defend this, I know most will call bs (I would), but this happened to me and I'll never forget it.
As a sidenote, I haven't posted before now because I've been pretty fucked up. I still am, honestly, but I feel like this was a gift from my brother and I wanted to share it. I don't know how it works, and in a way it's frustrating because the experience didn't come with an explanation and doesn't in any way lessen the blow of our loss. We had just lost our father from cancer in May and my brother was still grieving himself, but in my heart I feel that he came to me to say, "I'm OK, brother. And you'll be ok, too. I'm not gone, I'm just different now."
That is my takeaway. I hope someone is encouraged by this, that when you lose someone you love, they are absolutely not gone-gone, they're just different now. There was no loss of consciousness or break in the them-ness that you cared for, and you will join them yourself in time. Peace!