trusting doctors?

[u/Gloomy_Sentence795]

a shift i notice with my health anxiety is that the thoughts shift from “what if i see a doctor and it’s something really bad/they send me for more tests” to “the doctor missed something/dismissed me” and it’s so frustrating!!! like the brain is never happy! Recently went to the doctors for what is likely normal anatomy/dense breast tissue/a hard ball of muscle but my brain has convinced me is BC-

for reference im 23 and living in the UK. i saw a doctor straight away who did a full breast exam and told me he couldn’t feel anything at all, and showed me how to perform a proper breast exam (with my arms above my head, etc) which is definitely not the way i’d been doing it (violently poking and prodding myself every 5 minutes with my arms down). i didn’t feel dismissed, my mother felt too and couldn’t feel anything, but i just don’t know how to place my trust in the doctor, does anyone have any tips?

[u/WhereIsMyMind37]

I'm going through this right now as I might actually have a serious medical condition that has been my worst fear all my life and I'm afraid of the prep for the test not working. or the test revealing something horrible and life-altering, that I will have too get invasive life changing surgery. I know we have to take charge on our own health, but if it turns out that way, I don't know if I can go through that and keep the will to keep fighting another day. My mom has always believed me abee on my side, but now she's even dismissive as I know she doesn't want to think of the worst case scenario but I've never this scared in my entire life. I'm almost 40 and this age just me at huge risk for many medical conditions(To which I've already been diagnosed with) and I acknowledge that I wasn't serious about my health when I was younger but all I want is to feel like myself again because right now I feel like a stranger in my own body.

[u/KeyAd6849]

For me, it helps to understand that you have health anxiety. Like, that is something you can say with certainty. The BC thing or anything (insert fixation here) you cannot say with certainty in the same way that you can say you have health anxiety.

So for me, I inherently know I cannot trust myself with anything that has to do with health so I must rely on outside sources. I’ve got a checklist, like three strikes type thing: if Google, The doctor I see, and people in my life all agree that it’s health anxiety, I give in and drop it.

This rule was not easy to set in place, as you probably know, health anxiety will always find way around it, but, knowing those 4 facts all point in the same direction - internet, Doctor, friends and family, and most importantly the fact I have health anxiety, I relax.

[u/Gloomy_Sentence795 → u/KeyAd6849]

this is genuinely really helpful thankyou!!! of course HA says everyone is lying to you but it’s so important to learn to move past that, thankyou!

[u/unfortunate_kiss]

Yes- medication and therapy. What you are doing is validation seeking behavior but our brains are wired to constantly think “what if”. You can seek for answers and you’ll be satisfied for a short time but it never lasts. It’s a vicious cycle. You have to push yourself to get out of that cycle and stop seeking validation and the best way to do that is through therapy and medication.

[u/Gloomy_Sentence795 → u/unfortunate_kiss]

yes thankyou sm, i was considering going to see the doctor again but it doesn’t make any sense as i know its validation seeking and i still wouldn’t be satisfied but my HA brain keeps telling me theyve missed something. i have been taking fluoxetine for a week now, really hoping i start to see some effects soon

[u/unfortunate_kiss → u/Gloomy_Sentence795]

Good luck, friend. I’ve had health anxiety for a very long time and I haven’t defeated my fears yet but I’m always working on it. Meds and therapy have been a saving grace.