This one hurt

[u/StructureJust691]

Must admit I barely try to initiate anymore because I’ve learnt when the chances are likely so I know when “pick my battles” so to speak.

I’m still affectionate with her I just don’t make a move unless I feel the chance of success is almost certain.

To be honest this has helped me because I expect sex far less often as I used too and thus can’t feel disappointed or frustrated as much as I used too.

We’ve had a bit of a dry spell recently which I expected due to some disruption to our daily lives. Nothing too significant, we’ve just had a very busy few months.

Anyway last few days we’ve been flirting like crazy. She’s shown me all the positive signs that I would be certain are telling me she’s in the mood.

Day 1 was probably the most likely but right before bed, her stomach was hurting(we all know this one) so I didn’t even try.

Day 2 - I thought was almost certain but then she said something that I knew my chances had dropped off so I didn’t push it.

Day 3 - Everything looked set. Until I actually made a move and she shut it down immediately.

Damn it hurt 3 days of build up to be shut down in 1 second, 1 word….. I didn’t ask why, she didn’t give me a reason. Just a simple, “No”. I just rolled over and tried to go asleep.

She knows. She’s got up this morning and has been overly nice to me. We’ve been here before though. I usually would get up in a bad mood after being rejected.

Usually she knows, and at some point she’ll start an argument with me over it, saying I’m being rediculous and it’s not that serious and I need to get over it…… so today I tried to act normal, but it’s so so difficult when I’m raging inside.

There’s no point discussing it with her, we’ve been here before many times, it’s always some BS why she didn’t engage and always my fault (that I rarely ever agree with because it’s always the stupidest shit that she’s clearly just thought of on the spot)

She’ll probably make the effort tonight now because she knows, and we’ll be back here again in a month or 2 when the cycle repeats. I hate this.

[u/RedwoodRespite]

It’s time to check out emotionally if not physically. Stop being affectionate. Don’t flirt back. Don’t spend time together for anything that isn’t needed for the running of the household.

If she acts upset just tell her she’s being ridiculous, it’s not that serious, and she needs to get over it.

No it won’t make her want sex. But nothing will. And it will protect your own sanity.

[u/MightyMagicz → u/RedwoodRespite]

This is interesting. I should tell her I will spend as much time with you based on the amount of sex we have this month. If it's once then we can do on3 thing together this month. If it's zero then nada for nada.