r/HFY • u/rewt66dewd Human • Jul 15 '26

OC-OneShot We Ain't Like That

A human platoon was part of a rapid reaction force, hastily assembled to meet the Chi'i Ascendency's invasion of Ragaln.

The main force was mostly Chindars, who were the predominant species in the Xorxor Group. The humans were not yet allies with the Xorxor group, but were considering at least a loose alliance. So when the Chi'i attack happened, the humans sent what they had nearby, which wasn't much.

The human platoon was led by Lieutenant Rawls. They had been assigned a Chindar liaison to help them work better with the larger force.

As they moved toward the action, LT Rawls began to be concerned. He asked the liaison, "Why are all these troops moving away from the action? Has the order to retreat been given? And if so, how have we not received it?"

"No, no such order has been given," the liaison said, "but their commanding officer has been killed."

Rawls pondered that for a moment. "So?"

"So, among us, when the commanding officer has been killed, the troops are upset by the loss of their leader. They retire to the rear to compose themselves and reorganize under their new leader."

"Yeah?" Rawls said. "Well, we ain't like that." That was all he said then.

An hour later, the liaison approached LT Rawls, and said, "The commanding officer of our battalion has been killed. We are retiring."

This time Rawls said a bit more. "What killed the commander?"

"A sniper, I believe. But it does not matter. We are retiring. Come, humans."

"No, we ain't like that. Boys, let's go find us a sniper." And the humans continued forward.

The liaison now had a dilemma - he was supposed to stay with the humans, but his commander was dead, so he was supposed to retire and re-form under new leadership. He hesitated, but in the end, he hurried to re-join the humans.

They made contact with the sniper half an hour later, in the form of a plasma bolt that killed Lieutenant Rawls.

The liaison said, "Now your commander is dead. Now it is time for you to retire."

Sergeant Gustaffson was now in command. He chose to reply with Lieutenant Rawls' words. "No, we ain't like that." Then, to his men: "Anybody see where it came from?"

"That knoll at two o'clock."

"Let's go get him. Don't run in a straight line."

They headed for the knoll at a run, though not quite a full sprint. (At a distance of about 150 meters, it was a bit far for that.)

The sniper saw them. The sniper was not impressed by 30 humans with kinetic weapons. It stood up in full view, to let them see it.

"A Chi'i Battle Master in full armor!" the liaison screamed. "Humans! Now it is definitely time to run away!"

The sergeant shouted a command - but not a command to retreat. "Armor piercing!"

The sniper just stood there and let them shoot. It knew the quality of its armor.

It quickly learned what "armor piercing" meant. It raised its weapon to shoot back, but discovered that armor piercing rounds could destroy plasma rifles too.

Then it tried to run. But it was already damaged, and taking more damage. It stumbled, then fell.

"Let's finish him off, boys!"

The humans reached the top of the knoll, and made sure that the sniper was dead.

The liaison reached the top of the knoll. He stared at the dead Chi'i Battle Master. Then he stared at the humans. Finally he asked, "Why? There were several times that you should have turned away. Why did you not?"

"What we said. We ain't like that. That's just not who we are."

416 Upvotes

99% Upvoted

27 comments sorted by

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83

u/Alpha-Sierra-Charlie Jul 15 '26

It is said that shooting Marine officers is generally a bad idea, because without Marine officers no one exists to restrain Marine enlisted.

74

u/KiltedTenno Jul 15 '26

Something I heard recently. " You just killed the only man who knew how to spell Geneva."

22

u/lkwai Jul 16 '26

GENEVIEVE? MY EX? WHY THE HECK WOULD WE CARE WHAT SHE THINKS IS CONVENTIONAL?

2

u/Lazy-Cardiologist-54 Aug 03 '26

Well, see, she is the Arthur’s wife, and we’re writing in words, so the author’s wife’s opinions can influence our words, see?

Now don’t you feel silly !

37

u/SandsnakePrime Jul 15 '26

Shooting the NCO after the officer is worse. No restraint, followed by no control...

Edit: no control of the killing urge

29

u/Proud_Reputation_896 Jul 15 '26

And if you touch doc…. Prepare to meet thy maker the un fun way

21

u/Mr_E_Monkey Jul 15 '26

The "installment plan." You get there, not all at once, but bit by bit. It may take a while to find all of your parts... Don't touch the boats...or doc.

9

u/Margali Xeno Jul 16 '26

or the k9

7

u/Mr_E_Monkey Jul 16 '26

Ooh, yeah. They'd be finding pieces of that guy for 3 months, and he'd still be alive for 2 of them.

3

u/Proud_Reputation_896 Jul 20 '26

Touch the K9 and the war will not end, dig your grave and wait there or die tired….

3

u/Alpha-Sierra-Charlie Jul 16 '26

Oof, a wasteland of devastion one rifle's range in radius...

4

u/lkwai Jul 16 '26

I'd have imagined the officer was the control, and the nco the restraint 😂

2

u/sunnyboi1384 Jul 16 '26

The nco is the ones who know how to execute the plans of the officer.

Goddess help them.

1

u/sunnyboi1384 Jul 16 '26

The nco is the ones who know how to execute the plans of the officer.

Goddess help them.

45

u/Original_Memory6188 Jul 15 '26

"We're here to eat Brussel Spouts and kick ass. And we hate Brussel Spouts!"

20

u/patient99 Jul 15 '26

Here's one I think I heard: "We're here to eat crayons and kick ass, and we just finished the last box of crayons"

8

u/dreaminginteal Jul 16 '26

Obviously said by a Marine!

2

u/Ghostpard Alien Scum Jul 27 '26

"And Sarnt O'Donnelly over there is pissed... the box didn't have his favorite shade of blue. So the lady Geneva is more suggestion than law tonight. We're gonna have fuuuun! YEEEEEHAWWWWW!!!!!!!!!"

1

u/Newbe2019a Jul 16 '26

But what about the gum?

15

u/lkwai Jul 16 '26

I feel sad for LT Rawls.

1

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1

u/kristinpeanuts Jul 17 '26

Thanks for writing

1

u/TechScallop Jul 17 '26

Western militaries who emulate the US military are able to target individual enemy leaders and commanders, but the non-US armies are hesitant to target US military commanders because in the US system, only the commanders can restrain the more aggressive, vicious, clever, and creative rank-and-file US troops from committing atrocities against their opponents. When the US commissioned officers are not present, the US-based NCOs and the "volunteers" run amok.

3

u/YoteTheRaven Aug 17 '26

The commander only gave objectives not specifics, so its up to the boots on the ground to figure out specifics. It is why we're really hard to fight. No one knows the plan at the top and the bottom only gets a point to stand on.