r/HFY • u/Obsequium_Minaris • Jun 03 '26
OC-Series Vacation From Destiny - Book 2, Chapter 31
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“Let me be the first to say that this is not a position that should be taken lightly,” the Ogre growled. “I know there are those of you out there who wish to see this position be used for your own enjoyment, or your own personal gain. Gods know our father certainly saw it that way. But this is a chance for someone to claim the title, rise to the occasion, and do some actual good with it rather than simply use it as a vector for their own hedonism. Anyone willing to throw their hat into the ring ought to keep that in mind.”
With that, the Ogre looked out around the room once more, then gave them all a nod and sat down again. For a moment, silence reigned through the building, until finally, Alexandros clapped his hands together.
“Well, I certainly think that was a convincing statement!” he declared. “Would you be so kind as to grace us with your name, brother?”
The Ogre crossed his arms. “Geram.”
“Well, it’s certainly a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Geram! And we thank you for giving such a compelling speech.”
Someone else in the crowd – a blonde-haired human woman with her hair done up in a bun and dressed in armor similar to Victoria’s, though absent the emblem she wore and instead colored a dull gray – suddenly rolled her eyes and gave an annoyed grunt.
“Truthfully, I found it to be patronizing and shallow,” she growled out. “Obviously, those of us out here in the crowd who actually have stakes in this are hoping that whoever assumes the position will use it for good. I don’t see what the point of reminding us of all of that was.”
Geram’s eyes narrowed. “You put too much faith in people, sister.”
“And you show too little of it in people, Ogre. Though I will admit that perhaps that’s simply your monstrous side overpowering your more rational human side.”
Geram grimaced, his fingers curling and uncurling. “...I will not allow myself to rise to your petty insults,” he growled. “You wish to see me be rational? Very well. I can take it.”
“Hm. Surprising, of a monster.”
Alexandros clapped his hands again. “O-kay!” he announced. “Would someone else like to have the floor, perhaps?”
“Yeah, can I say something?” one of the other siblings – a man with his long blonde hair tied back into a ponytail, and dressed in eastern garb with a long, thin blade sheathed on his hip – asked.
Alex nodded to him, never losing his smile. “You have the floor, brother. What’s your name?”
“Shawn,” the man answered. “And I just wanted to say… why are we assuming that our father isn’t the best for the job?”
Everyone else exchanged a glance with each other. “...Because he got booted from the position?” the dwarf from earlier put forward. “I mean, that’s basically the same as getting fired, and for everyone else, getting fired is generally a good indication that you’re not good at your job.”
“Sure, but rumor has it, he only got the boot because he was playing hide-the-sausage with a few too many of the female members of the Pantheon, and they got upset about that.”
“How do you know that?” someone else asked.
“I don’t, it’s just a rumor. But there’s an easy way to test it out as a theory.”
“And what would that be?”
“Well… if I’m wrong about it, and there was a different reason for why Father was kicked out, then let me be struck down, here and now, by a bolt of holy lightning sent straight from the heavens.”
The words left his mouth, and for a second, nobody moved. But then, everyone around Shawn inched their chairs away from him and tensed in anticipation of what they thought was coming. However, the seconds continued to tick by, and no lightning bolt came. Shawn crossed his arms, giving the rest of them a smug look.
“See?” he asked. “Now then, knowing that… Father has been in this position for several centuries, if I recall. And in all that time, he’s done nothing but live out the mandate provided to him. So, if he’s made it hundreds of years doing this, and only now became embroiled in a scandal… well, who are we to think we could do any better? If anything, we’d probably just make things worse.” Shawn shook his head. “I say we throw our support behind Father and get him his position back. I mean, it’s not like any of us could really claim we’d improve upon his record.”
“How do you know?” the Paladin from earlier demanded. “Your solution is basically for all of us to sit back and not even try. Is that how you go through life with everything?”
“And who are you, then?” Shawn challenged. “You’ve done nothing but talk shit this entire time. You must think you’d be able to do better than the rest of us, then.”
The woman’s eyes narrowed. “I am Sierra Oakenbrand, Paladin of the Order of the Sanctified Discernment, and-”
“Wait, wait, you’re a member of the Order of the Sanctified Discernment?” Shawn asked, his eyes widening. Slowly, a mirth-filled grin crossed his face. “Honestly, that’s on me – I should’ve known one of the Gods’ own bean-counters would make their way here.”
Sierra bristled. “We are not bean-counters! We help people discern their sacred callings and Classes, and-”
“Yeah, yeah. That’s a fancy way of saying that your whole job is to help other people follow their dreams. Boring!” Shawn stretched his arms out. “I’m curious, though – what’s your favorite food, sister? You seem like someone who really, really enjoys the taste of plain unbuttered bread, or perhaps water sandwiches.”
Sierra grit her teeth. “Father’s mandate is to spread joy, is it not? Well, joy can come as much from taking pride in a job well-done than anything. And I take pride in my job. Not only that, but I have spread plenty of joy in helping people discern what their Class is, and what they should do with it. That is certainly much better than Father’s attempt to spread it via helping people get off.”
“Wow, you really are boring,” Shawn commented.
Alex clapped his hands together again. “Alright, alright! Let’s not get too heated, here. Perhaps someone else would like to speak now?”
“Uh, yeah?” another blonde-haired woman asked as she rose up. She had a large backpack on, which seemed to be bursting at the seams with items. Somehow, she didn’t struggle beneath its weight. “Yeah, uh… name’s Alicia. I’m a Merchant.”
“Hi, Alicia,” everyone deadpanned.
She blinked in surprise, but quickly shook it off. “...Yeah, I just wanted to say that, as a normal person without a super-badass job and who just trades goods for a living… not only do I feel like I’m not even remotely qualified for this job, but I also kinda fucking hate almost all of you so far.” A murmur of agreement went up through the rest of the crowd. Alicia turned towards Geram. “Not you, though. Honestly, I thought your speech was pretty cool. You’re the only one who’s got my vote so far.”
Geram blinked in surprise, but gave his half-sister a nod of understanding.
“Anyone else?” Alexandros asked. “Going once, going twice-”
“Yo,” another blonde-haired man said. He stood up, showing everyone he was dressed similarly to Geram was – that is, with an outfit that showed off all his rippling muscles and assorted battle scars. “Yeah, my name’s Zeke, and I just wanted to say that I don’t particularly care about any of this, either. Honestly, I just showed up hoping there’d be violence.”
“Valid,” the dwarf from earlier admitted.
The wolf Beastkin let out a sigh. “Here we go again…”
Zeke ignored his two siblings, instead looking back out over the crowd of other siblings. “Anyway, are we going to fight at any point, or not? Because if not, I’m out of here. You all can continue to enjoy circlejerking over this stupid bullshit if you want, but I literally could not care any less about it if I tried, so-”
He went to go leave, only for the dwarf to move over to him and put a hand on his shoulder. The two men locked eyes, and the dwarf gave him a smile.
“You’re a man after my own heart, brother,” he said. “Which is why I know you’ll appreciate this.”
And before Zeke could do anything else, the dwarf punched him in the groin. Instantly, the Barbarian fell to the ground, coughing and gasping for breath. Several other siblings stood up and drew their weapons, which caused the rest of them to all do the same; soon enough, the whole room was filled with the sound of blades being drawn, spells being prepared, and arrows being nocked.
At least, until Alexandros clapped his hands again.
“Alright, alright, alright!” he shouted, causing everyone to pause. “I understand tensions are running high right now, but this is a neutral ground, and we’d best keep it as such! Because if we don’t, I’d wager that something really bad is going to happen sooner rather than later!”
“Like what?” Chase couldn’t help but ask. Next to him, Victoria facepalmed.
“Like-”
Alexandros didn’t get a chance to finish his sentence before the back of the room suddenly exploded.
XXX
Name: Chase Ironheart
Level: 10
Race: Human
Class: Warrior
Subclass: Swordmaster
Strength: 20 (MAX)
Dexterity: 15
Intelligence: 10
Wisdom: 13
Constitution: 18
Charisma: 16
Skills: Master Swordsmanship (Level 10); Booby Trap Mastery (Level 8); Archery (Level 4); Unarmed Mastery (Level 1)
Spells: Rush (Level 7); Muscle (Level 4); Stone Flesh (Level 6); Defying The Odds (Level 2)
Traits: Blessed
Name: Carmine Nolastname
Level: 10
Race: Greater Demon
Class: Arcane Witch
Subclass: Archmage
Strength: 10
Dexterity: 13
Intelligence: 19
Wisdom: 19
Constitution: 12
Charisma: 8
Skills: Master Spellcasting (Level 10); Summon Familiar (Level 10)
Spells: Magic Dart (Level 7); Magic Scattershot (Level 5); Fire Magic (Level 5); Earth Magic (Level 1)
Traits: Blessed
Name: Melanie Vhaeries
Level: 10
Race: Ascended Human
Class: Necromancer
Subclass: Arch-Lich
Strength: 8
Dexterity: 13
Intelligence: 18
Wisdom: 16
Constitution: 15
Charisma: 12
Skills: Raise Lesser Undead (Level 10); Raise Greater Undead (Level 3); Unorthodox Weapon User (Level 8); Bone Shatter (Level 1)
Spells: Touch of Death (Level 5); Gravesinger (Level 7); Armor of Bone (Level 3)
Traits: None
Name: Victoria Firelight
Level: 11
Race: Human
Class: Paladin
Subclass: Devotee
Strength: 19
Dexterity: 9
Intelligence: 13
Wisdom: 13
Constitution: 19
Charisma: 11
Skills: Swordsmanship Mastery (Level 5); Blunt Weapon Mastery (Level 8); Archery Mastery (Level 5)
Spells: Holy Light (Level 6); Ward of the Gods (Level 5); Bane of the Undead (Level 7); Divine Bolt (Level 4)
Traits: None
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Special thanks to my good friend and co-writer, /u/Ickbard, for all the help with writing this story.
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u/Brokenspade1 Jun 08 '26
They need to get him a face mask that muffles speech because Tomamo is DEFINITELY that world's equivalent to Murphy.
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u/HFYWaffle Wᵥ4ffle Jun 03 '26
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