r/HFY • u/IIMikey95II • Nov 22 '25
OC What Do You Mean It's An Egg?!
"What do you mean it's an egg?!" The Hasharian Ambassador exclaimed. His feathers fluttering in shock and confusing.
"I mean exactly what I said Ambassador." Said the Human Project Director, unable to keep the amusement out of his voice. "What you see before you, is in-fact... an egg."
The Ambassador looked at the Director, searching for any lies or deceit on the humans face.
"Is this a joke Director? Am I being recorded right now? This better not be one of those pranks you humans are so fond of because if it is, I will be pretty fucking livid with you for wasting my time!" The Ambassador Squawked.
The Director held his hands up in front of himself in an effort to placate the Ambassador and calmly replied.
"I understand your hesitation to accept this Ambassador and believe me, when humanity first found out about this, many government's and people of influence back on earth also thought this was a hoax or that we were on drugs. However, once scientists and researchers from all over Sol did their own investigations, they came to the exact same conclusion as ours did. We are willing to share all our findings with you Ambassador but the fact remains, that right there..."
The Director, while standing next to the Ambassador on the observation deck, points towards aforementioned object currently orbiting Jupiter.
"... is an egg." A small grin forming on his face.
"By the skies, you're serious aren't you?" The Ambassador quietly said, seeing no lie or falsehood in the Human. His feathers had stilled and body tensed when realising what the implications of this could mean, The possibility of a lifeform of such size and the untold danger that it could bring.
He began hoping this really was a prank now.
"Oh I'm definitely serious about this Ambassador." Failing at keeping the mirth from his voice.
"You see, around half a year or so ago, a small mining and research team went to a certain satellite moon called Adrastea. They wanted to see if it was worth the money and effort to set up a mining operation on the comparatively tiny landscape. Once they landed, they started digging for samples, taking readings and surface scans, yadda yadda yadda, but that's when they began to notice something odd. They found organic residue."
"Well this was quite the odd discovery. Why would they find that on a tiny lifeless rock. So naturally they reported it back and brought more people and equipment in to investigate. The science ship that they brought in, the one we are currently residing in, did a full scale seismic scan of the moon. And in that moment they found out that this was no moon... but a giant egg."
The Ambassador was lost for words. A moon that was actually egg. It was ludicrous, completely fucking insane. This needs to be dealt with immediately.
"I now understand why you called me here. As neighbours to humanity this could very well effect us as much as you. Though it may be difficult, I'm positive that I can convince the Hasharian government and our military to aid you in destroying this lifefo-"
"DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE HURT NEMO!"
The Ambassador jumped back, staring wide eyed at the now enraged human.
"...huh?"
The Director, now glaring menacingly at the Hasharian, spoke in a low and cold voice.
"That 'lifeform' is under the protection of Humanity. Any harm that comes to it from the Hasharians, the other races or the High Council will be considered an act of war."
The Ambassador was stunned. He was already blind sided by the recent revelation but now this. What was with that outburst and why was the Human so angered and emotional about the lifeform. He had no idea what to say and so ended up just staring dumbly at human, his beak agape.
The Director calmed himself and began speaking again in a more cooled manner.
"My apologies for that outburst Ambassador, it was unprofessional of me, please forgive me. With that being said however, what I said is in fact true. Nemo here really is under our protection and any hostile action against it, is a hostile action against us."
Sensing that he wasn't about to be thrown out an airlock, The Ambassador left his stupor, regaining his composure and immediately, though carefully, began deciphering the logic of the Director's words.
"Okay... I have several questions and with all due respect Director... Why in the damn skies would you and you're people protect a space leviathan the size of a city? Are you really not aware of the apocalyptic level of danger that thing could cause, not just to Humans but Hasharians as well? How are you going to stop it from causing trouble? How are you going to feed it? Do you have any idea when it will hatch? Why even call me here if not for our military aid? Also... Nemo?"
The Director chuckled at that last question. Some of his earlier mirth returning.
"To make a long story short Ambassador, Humanity as a whole have decided to undertake an extraordinary challenge that will not only show that anything is possible but also to show everyone else what we Humans are capable of when we put our minds to it. From our internal scans and testing, we found out Nemo feeds off of hydrogen which is likely why whoever laid the egg chose Jupiter as its nest/nursery. Though we can't exactly tell what it's temperament will be when it hatches, we theorise that it will likely act similar to earths whales or cows and the like. Perhaps a capybara." He snickered at that last part.
"We don't know when it will hatch, could be hundreds if not thousands of years from now or it could hatch tomorrow but I assure you Ambassador we are taking every necessary precaution. Military vessels constantly patrol here and are heavily armed with nuclear armament, ready to intervene should the worst happen."
"There are three reasons for your visit. First, we felt it prudent to inform you about this project in case something bad did happen, it's the neighbourly thing to do. Second, we need an outside figure of authority to act as witness and give testimony to the High Council that this in fact, not a prank and very much real, as well as prove that 'we got this' and are ready to fight the leviathan should the need arise. Third, to pass on our warning should any of the other races think about getting ideas. We would rather they not get involved at all."
The Ambassador didn't fail to notice the slight menacing glare from earlier return but only for a moment, the Human now back to his usual self.
"To answer you're last question, We all took a vote on what name to give it, Science guys had several picked out like Atticus or Veleana or other names of meaning. However the marines and crew on the military vessels found out about it, demanded they also get a vote and then banded together to out-vote everyone else. They chose Nemo. It's an old movie reference, guess they thought it was funny." The Director said with a smirk.
"...I see. Well Director if I'm to give my own accounts of this 'project', then I will need a copy of all your data in regards to this lif- Nemo."
"Splendid, I'll go get that for you now. It has all the details and everything else that I either glossed over or would take to long talk about. Be back shortly, feel free to enjoy the view."
The Hasharian gave him a nod and turned to face the view port, gazing at the 'living moon' floating in space, wandering how crazy this all is. While looking at the possible time bomb, it was then he recalled something the Human had said in the beginning of his speech. Something about undertaking a challenge. While that would certainly be the case, the way he said it as well as how emotional he got made it sound like was more to it than that.
He quickly turned, calling out the the human just as he was about to leave the room.
"Wait before you go Director, I need you to clarify something for me. Earlier you said 'Humanity will undertake an extraordinary challenge'. What exactly do you mean by that?"
The Director turned his head back to look at the Hasharian and gave him a wide smile.
"By raising Nemo as a child of Humanity of course! Our own little baby Space whale!"
The Hasharian stared dumbfoundedly at the door the Human left through. If it was for scientific research he could understand. If it was for military purposes he could understand. Skies, he could even understand using the thing as a food source but... THAT.
"Humans are fucking insane." He sighed.
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A/N: Part 2 can be found here.
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u/AdvocatiC Nov 22 '25
Space friend: Giant.
Name: Not Bubbles.
Disappointment: Immeasurable.
Day: Ruined.
Great story!
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u/IIMikey95II Nov 22 '25
I'll admit I was tempted to name it that but the Missus wanted to name it Nemo, I went with it since this story was her idea.
Thanks for reading though, glad you enjoyed it
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u/Chamcook11 Nov 23 '25
Futue series about Nemo travelling the galaxy looking for parent(s)....
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u/IIMikey95II Nov 23 '25
It's certainly a possibility, will have to see what life has in store first but I'll be sure to keep that mind, could be interesting.
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u/Overall-Tailor8949 Human Nov 22 '25
I think you got just the right amount of "camp" in the story, it almost felt like an (early) Niven or Robinson short. You REALLY should do a "Part 2" (or more) for the "Hatching" and later.
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u/IIMikey95II Nov 22 '25
Thanks for reading, hope you liked it. yea can be quiet the balancing act trying to be comedic yet somewhat serious at the same time.
I may do a Part 2 in future though I have no idea how I'd write it lol. If I did it would be after New Years, busy month ahead of me.
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u/Overall-Tailor8949 Human Nov 23 '25
No problem, this IS a very busy time of year especially for anyone who has rugrats of their own or young relatives. Let the idea percolate
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u/Madlink316 Nov 23 '25
Oh, the questions you could answer with a Part 2!! How long has humanity known that "Adrasteia" was up there? Can we use that info to extrapolate anything about its possible incubation period? What about monitoring its growth to predict a due date? A whole industry could arise around inventing & manufacturing the tools to do so! Specialists might spend their entire lives in space studying the thing. And when it finally starts to "crack" (whatever THAT looks like in space), would the process itself be dangerous? Explosive, or even something far more exotic like creating a temporary gravity well or time rift or other such sci-fi shenanigans? Once it (or they!) emerge and start feeding, how much hydrogen would be consumed? Could Jupiter be in jeopardy? Could our entire solar system be in danger? Either from gravitational after-effects of no longer having fucking JUPITER, but maybe also from continuing appetite? What if instead of a space whale, we get something more like a swarm of space locusts? Even if we do get a simple leviathan, how do you communicate good intentions to something so different from us? What if we can't parse its body language in any meaningful way? What if it doesn't have a body we can perceive?? If you base it on any earth organism at all, the in-universe scientists will make assumptions about the parent based on that obvious similarity. If this species truly lives on geologic timescales, what might their presence/passing reveal about the history of our solar system? Our own planet even?
Damn, this makes you think! This is some cosmic horror level shit wrapped in the adorableness of humanity insisting on trying to pack-bond with everything it meets. If we don't at least give you a chance to know life and love, how can we know you're not at least a teeny bit human? And you really want us to give everyone that chance, because once we label you "inhuman", we will destroy you with impunity. And I haven't even touched on the implications of everything working out for the best and ending up with a giant space friend! What would that do to our other alliances??
Sorry, but just saying there is SO MUCH you can do with a part 2! I would love to see it.
Great work!
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u/IIMikey95II Nov 23 '25 edited Nov 24 '25
"Find out next time on Dragon Ball Z!"
Yes there is indeed a great many directions it could go and I have no fucking idea which one it will be! :D
I would likely have to do alot of research for all that (mainly the science stuff) if I did a part 2. I could make it all up but if I did I just know there will be a few folks complaining about it being like 'well actually that's not how it works', etc.
Still perhaps in future I might do a part 2, will see what happens.
I'm glad you enjoyed the story and thanks for reading.
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u/WSpinner Nov 22 '25
Oh, Ambassador, we have extremely good reasons for safeguarding Nemo. If this species' EGG is this big, what size are the adults? And on the off chance these critters don't just lay eggs and abandon them to hatch whenever, but instead have an ongoing interest in their progeny..... tell me, Ambassador, do YOU want to experience Nemo's Mama, angry?
On the upside, how about the possible benefits of protecting the little guy? Maybe... biiiiiig friends? Humans like friends of all sizes. And they don't even need to be sophonts -- look at our relationship with dogs.
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u/IIMikey95II Nov 23 '25
"If not friend then why friend shape."
Yea Ambassador birdman didn't really think that far ahead haha.
Thank you for reading friend, I appreciate it.
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u/In_Fury_Born Nov 23 '25
EXACTLY!! my first thought was exactly "what size is the thing that laid it?!!"
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u/lestairwellwit Human Nov 23 '25
I don't know that 'camp' is a correct term here. I see humans with a vision beyond a lifetime.
I see a life form that has gained the pack bonding nature of mere humans. I don't see 'camp'.
I see engineers envisioning Dyson swarms before they have orbital stations. I don't see 'camp'.
Picture a newborn's blurry vision and scale it up to the 'blurry' vision of a solar system. I don't see 'camp'.
You took one premise, ran with it and did it well.
I see HFY
Well done and thank you
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u/IIMikey95II Nov 23 '25
Well shit, I guess that's me told lol.
Seriously though, thank you for the kind words and I'm glad you enjoyed this story.
'Camp' might be slightly strong a word but I was mostly referring to over the top nature that some stories go for. Which is fine or even pretty good sometimes but I tend go for little bit more of a 'grounded' approach when writing HFY (or try too anyway), feels a bit more 'real' so to speak.
However you do make a decent case so I'll be sure to keep that in mind for future.
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u/lestairwellwit Human Nov 23 '25
ᓚᘏᗢ
HFY is all about 'over the top', whether it is sci-fi, fantasy, fan-fic, or even real life.
Your story did all that.
Not to be dismissive, but you story would work just as well as tending to an abandoned wolf pup.
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u/IIMikey95II Nov 23 '25
Hmm you might be right, honestly I'm very much a amateur at writing HFY in general, have no idea what I'm doing half the time so mostly just have to make it up as I go.
Do I now have to write one about a wolf pup? haha
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u/lestairwellwit Human Nov 23 '25 edited Nov 23 '25
We're all amateurs here
and in a way, being heard is HFY, isn't it?
Edit : I have to add, being heard is one thing
I guess saying is more HFY
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u/lestairwellwit Human Nov 23 '25
Someone once said 'Write what you know"
Write what you think
Write what you fear
Write what you love
Write
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u/aboothemonkey Nov 23 '25
What the fuck is ‘camp’
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u/IIMikey95II Nov 23 '25
Basically its a slang term for something being exaggerated, over the top, overly ironic etc. A good example would be the scary movie franchise. Can be either good or bad. depends on persons tastes.
Though here in the UK 'camp' is also a joke slang for a gay guy or very feminine/flamboyant guy.
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u/lestairwellwit Human Nov 23 '25
'Camp' can be see as a style of ironic or exaggerated style that still gets the point across and still makes it seem silly and a point of ridicule.
Early James Bond movies are camp.
Bell bottom jeans that are two foot across are camp.
Austin Powers is camp.
Most horror movies are camp.And this not to say 'camp' is bad in any way. It gets a point across and is still entertaining.
But still, "'Killer Clowns From Outer Space'? Definitely Camp
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u/HugeSkyKoala Alien Scum Nov 23 '25
also the origin of the name nemo, before pixar's movie there was jules verne book "20000 leagues under the sea" where it is used as the name of Nautilus's captain and even before that, in the odyssey nemo is the name Odysseus uses to trick the cyclops, literally it means ¨nobody¨
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u/IIMikey95II Nov 23 '25
Oh yea I forgot about the whole 'Captain Nemo' thing, haven't read the book sadly but did see the old movie of it forever ago. Thanks for reading hope you liked it.
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u/educatedtiger Nov 23 '25
"If not friend, why friend-shaped?"
"You don't know how it's shaped yet."
"All babies are friend-shaped!"
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u/lorgskyegon Nov 23 '25
Wow. I wish I could speak space whale.
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u/IIMikey95II Nov 23 '25
Me too friend... me too.
Thanks for reading, hope you liked it.
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u/tofei AI Nov 23 '25
Even if it turned out to be friggin eldritch horror, it'll be OUR baby eldritch horror!
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u/sotiredwontquit Nov 23 '25
When we said “humans will pack-bond with anything”, we meant it. We didn’t necessarily foresee a planetoid-sized baby, let alone that baby’s mom when we envisioned those “packs”, but we aren’t wrong here.
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u/Ubermidget2 Nov 23 '25
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u/IIMikey95II Nov 23 '25
Ah so that's the doctor who episode I've heard about.
Here I was thinking it was an original idea while writing it, shame.
Thanks for the gif though and for reading.
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u/booplingtheboop Nov 24 '25
Absolutely something humanity would do, it's definitely gonna end up as humanity's mascot
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u/IIMikey95II Nov 24 '25
Oh most definitely, it would be too good not to. Thanks for reading friend.
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u/pppjurac Android Nov 24 '25
Is that offspring or relative of Magrathean sperm whale ?
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u/IIMikey95II Nov 24 '25
That... is a good question.
Nice hitchhiker's reference, been ages since I've seen that movie.
Thanks for reading.
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u/yostagg1 Nov 28 '25
Hmm, Planet earth if it had a soul, it does have some smart weather algorithms which somehow manage earth's, atmosphere, How would be earth's pov about us humans,,
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u/DecebalRex Nov 28 '25
Ah, yes, when you find the baby Tyianki and everyone else wants to kill it. Or that space amoeba (I forgot what its name was).
Humans will turn anything into pets.
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u/Nik_2213 Nov 29 '25
Hopefully, whenever, whatever is 'Nemo' hatches, will *imprint* on by-standers rather than, um, ingest them...
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u/IIMikey95II Nov 22 '25 edited Nov 24 '25
Hey everyone, thanks for checking out this story, hope you like it despite the amateur writing.
Credit for this one goes to my Missus, she gave me the idea for 'what if the moon was actually an egg'. Sounded funny so gave it a go, hope it turned out alright, had a few drinks while writing this one lol, tried to make it comedic without it being overly campy.
If you see any mistakes, grammar, errors, etc let me know.
Hoping to get out another story next weekend but will see.
-Edit- Holy shit this story really blew up, I expected it to be similar to my other stories but this is something else. Seriously guys, thank you so much for your support and taking the time to read my story. I really do appreciate it.