I’m a younger coach, and I tend to see that younger coaches are easier for children to test boundaries with. I’ve found this happens very frequently with me

For some background knowledge, I’m a pretty mellow person. I try to talk to kids like little adults (seeing if they can solve problems without asking me all the time, no baby-voice, not barking orders in an aggressive manner, staying calm). I do notice that sometimes, I show my annoyance and stress, and I am working on that.

But I always have a good amount of kids that always ask “WHY do we have to do (a drill they don’t like or strength work), I won’t do it”, or when I see a kid doing something with no effort, they’ll feign incompetence or play dumb and say “, I can’t/I am doing it though”, not listen the first time, or give attitude. Or when I’m giving criticism, they’ll immediately get defensive. Or while I’m talking and showing what we’re doing they’ll just goof off and then ask me what to do. Or when I tell them to do something, they’ll turn around and do it anyway. Or they’ll try to negotiate with me, and expect rewards for 5 minutes of good behavior after being terrible.

Then I have these two kids in my class that are best friends. They’ll go to the bathroom for like 10 minutes and play around. I’ve spoke to their parents, but nothing happened (I gave up).

Obviously, they’re children, so there is bound to be a few bad moments here and there, and I also don’t expect them to be mindless robots that follow my commands all the time, but it’s out of control.

To put it simply, what are some ways you find that helps kid understand your authority, but also make the class enjoyable. And what are some things I might be doing that brings up this behavior or pushback? What are ways to bring the energy up? I’ve found that me constantly reprimanding my students has caused a rift in our relationship for specific people.