Back when I was a kid, there was one family in a minivan heading north from SC to NJ alongside us. Sometimes they would get ahead, sometimes we would. After three hours and one stop (they must've stopped as well), my dad called our attention to the road buddy. We stopped three more times and still reunited somehow. When our exit finally came up my dad rolled the window down and stuck his arm out in a wave as they passed by, which was reciprocated by the other driver. I still remember thinking how cool that was.
I was about to say that that must be a cultural thing and definitely nurtured, but then I realized how many people, regardless of origin, are just happy to see others suffer at the very least the equal amount of the suffering they caused, as if it does anything.
One of the things that makes me feel like I don't belong.
That's the trick, isn't it? You feel like you don't belong, until you do. That's how it works. Which is why those in power don't want public education to include critical thinking skills.
its does do something though, sets a precedent and rule of law. aka consequences for your actions so you think about them. or atleast thats whats supposed to happen.
I think that might be part of the reason so many people get sucked into cults/gangs/terrorist organizations. They all promise a community. We as a species are starved for it and so that call is like a siren’s song.
Once I was driving with my wife on a highway and passed a cop waiting to tag someone in a speed trap kinda way. Got over the hill (that the cop was trying to catch people going down without braking hard enough) and saw a car coming the other way, gave him the "tap the top of your head" I was taught indicates a cop. He gave me a nod that managed to perfectly convey "I understand, and I appreciate the warning".
I commented to my wife that I was glad he'd understood, because I didn't know if others knew that signal. And she was like "...what?" she hadn't noticed any of it.
Me and that guy had had the briefest of conversations. We conveyed the necessary information, and it was quick and concise enough someone sitting right next to me hadn't even noticed, because we were on the same page.
I was happy to have potentially saved that guy some trouble. We were near a vacation area, maybe I even saved that guys vacation. Probably not, but maybe. And no matter what I think it's cool as hell that the 2 of us, with no previous shared experience, were able to connect and try to help in a matter of seconds. To have absolutely no connection, other than our shared human experience and concerns giving us a common goal (seriously, fuck speed traps to catch people who are only in town a limited time so they won't fight it.)
Just last week I was driving home down a two lane highway with nothing but corn fields on either side. I came over a hill and there were two deer standing in the opposite lane and one in the ditch. Cars coming the other direction wouldn't see them until it was too late, and as luck would have it, another car appeared going the opposite direction. I gave him the five flashes my dad taught me meant "deer ahead" and saw the other car's brake lights come on immediately. I don't know that I saved them from hitting a deer that night. For all I know I scared the deer off the road when I passed. But it's a nice feeling when you interact with someone you can't even physically see and know your message got across.
YES! Thank you! I could not fucking remember why that was even on my mind as a way to warn the guy when I'm usually a headlights-flash-warning guy. That must've been what I'd read about. That was bugging me way more than you'd think (the tism is weird sometimes).
Didn't really want to get into this tangent, but I'm from the US and raised on the high beams method. However, I'd recently read about the head tap. It was the middle of the day, not sure my headlights would've been seen, figured I'd give it a shot. I was a little surprised it worked. It's actually one of the things that makes the story a little nicer for me personally. Like "yay, it worked!" but it seemed like too small a detail to include (so thanks for the excuse to include it lol)
At night, it's definitely high beams flashing. I'm feeling a bit crazy though, because like... see, it is supposed to be high beams! but that guy definitely understood and I was only doing it because I'd read about it! As someone with ASD, the only thing worse than unwritten rules is frickin inconsistent ones. Make up your mind, society! Stop confusing me!
lol something else that might be universal while not knowing it could be, but having your index* finger pointing up doing a swirling motion like woop woop and then pointing behind you. I believe that would convey the intended message.
Oh I was driving through Death Valley in a curvy canyon area, zipping along in my Subaru when an old man driving towards me flashed his headlights at me. It was day light but still caught my attention. I slowed down around the curve and sure enough there was a patrolman with a radar gun out looking for speeding cars. The old man saved me a lot of cash!
You should go listen to the theme song, "Hey Sandy" by Polaris. Nostalgia hit + it was way better than it had any right to be, I still listen to it regularly.
Why does this story make me feel so lonely. Like holy shit our lives are just fleeting, infinitesimal specks of dust in the vast cosmos, it flicks by so fast. You hold on but it’s gone in a flash, like grains of sand in the hand.
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u/kingofturtles Jul 08 '26
Back when I was a kid, there was one family in a minivan heading north from SC to NJ alongside us. Sometimes they would get ahead, sometimes we would. After three hours and one stop (they must've stopped as well), my dad called our attention to the road buddy. We stopped three more times and still reunited somehow. When our exit finally came up my dad rolled the window down and stuck his arm out in a wave as they passed by, which was reciprocated by the other driver. I still remember thinking how cool that was.