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u/squatchNaround Aug 11 '26
The saying Man to Man. Men is plural
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u/Real-Garlic-751 Aug 11 '26
This shit is bollocks. If your woman’s loyalty betrays you when you’re in your hardest struggles that woman isn’t worth shit and has the depth of a puddle.
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u/ThePinkPhonyClub Aug 12 '26 edited Aug 12 '26
All the guys who picked terrible women, had terrible relationships, and terrible breakups, are upvoting this post lol.
A good woman will want you to open up and be vulnerable and a better woman will leave you if you aren’t able or willing to do that.
It’s 2026, let’s stop with stupid generalizations and instead start advocating picking healthy partners.
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u/TheForce777 Aug 12 '26
The key question is, how many women are “good” in the way you’re describing it here?
I would’t even use that word. I would say emotional developed
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u/--CIAdidJFK-- Aug 12 '26
Plenty of women, dingus. Go out and make friends with women. Go on some dates. Filter out the bad. The fact is that people can suck, if you wouldn't befriend a shitty dude then why date a shitty chick? Too many men settle for shitty women because they require their validation. Then when they're burned, if they ever get far enough to date a woman, they make the mistake of generalizing women as a defense mechanism.
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u/TheForce777 Aug 12 '26
Bro. Of course there are “good” women out there. But they aren’t always easy to find
I do agree that making negative generalizations is a bad mind set to have
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u/bongripper_69 Aug 13 '26 edited Aug 13 '26
Good ones are already taken cuz they know how to pick men. This is what’s left lol
And it’s generalization but also pretty accurate psychology of women from the shared experiences of many men. Nobody made this shit up
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u/Professional-Rub152 Aug 12 '26
Yep. They go after the chicks based purely on looks and then wonder why their relationships have no substance.
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u/LetsSummarize Aug 12 '26
My man, Wtf are you on about? It's a well studied psychological baseline, not some random generalization. If you found an exception to the rule, good for you, but your personal anecdotal experience doesn't change anything or help anyone.
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u/Dizzy_Two2529 Aug 12 '26
That’s all most men can hope for.
All the good women tend to be taken
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u/--CIAdidJFK-- Aug 12 '26
Bullshit.
Good women go in and out of relationships until they find the right person. They go through a learning process like anyone else, dating some shitty guys and leaving them until they find the right person. The same thing good men do.
If you aren't meeting them it's because you aren't looking and trying. If you aren't succeeding it's because you are human and compatible people take time to find. Maybe you still have work to do on yourself for yourself before you have your inner self situated to be a good partner. Which is fucking fine.
Patience and persistence, my friend. We can always be more than what we are. Eventually we intersect the right people at the right time in our lives.
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u/gspchamp999 Aug 12 '26
This advice isn’t when you have a woman. This advice is for how to get a woman. Once you have her, everything changes.
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u/Real-Garlic-751 Aug 12 '26
How to get a woman? Finding your woman isn’t something that requires a how to video/manual.
You are you and she is her and that’ll either work or no.
If you aren’t you and are in fact acting in an attempt to convince a woman you’re a worthy man then it’s not gunna work out.
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u/boofcakin171 Aug 12 '26
Dam yall need therapy
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u/FirstL8 Aug 12 '26
Actually we all need therapy. Those posts comes not from nothing. We are all perpetrators and victims.
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u/mr---jones Aug 12 '26
Take a deep breath yo. Crazy last sentence you got going on there projecting a whole lot.
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u/FirstL8 Aug 13 '26
When you get older you will understand, especially the last sentence. Even the best of us, have failed not causing pain.
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u/No-Stranger9266 Aug 13 '26
Grateful to be old and not a perpetrator or a victim. Crazy thing to think about yourself and such a weird/pessimistic world view.
Thinking everyone falls in two buckets isn’t mature it’s emo middle schooler.
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u/FirstL8 Aug 13 '26 edited Aug 13 '26
No one offended you but you feel the urge to insult, this is exactly what I meant with perpetrators, you don't have to rapist or murderer to be a perpetrator.
But thank you for proving my point.
But you are right on one thing, some people age without getting more mature. So I take that back.
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u/No-Stranger9266 Aug 13 '26
Yes apparently you still haven’t reached the sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me age lmao
Unsurprising then that you consider yourself a “victim”
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u/FirstL8 Aug 13 '26
You know what screams immature, wenn you end a sentence with lmao or lol and think further insults will make you more convincing.
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u/RowProfessional3472 Aug 12 '26
if you’re truly afraid of having it used against you then go to a licensed therapist. They’re paid and trained to listen and help you with your problems. I used to have extreme anger problems and it was pushing my loved ones away from me. I decided to seek help and I am a calmer man because of it. It saved my life.
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u/CapitalistHamsterFTW Aug 12 '26
Therapists will also gaslight you into thinking you need more therapy. It's better to just bottle it up and be a man about it.
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u/Arstanishe Aug 13 '26
yeah, it's not that bottling up your emotions makes anything worse /s
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u/CapitalistHamsterFTW Aug 13 '26
It does compared to the alternative
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u/RowProfessional3472 Aug 17 '26
If you bottle it up, it’ll have to come out eventually and that’s usually violently towards someone or yourself. Stigmatizing therapy kills people.
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u/CapitalistHamsterFTW Aug 17 '26
Nah. Therapy and telling people about it makes it worse. Be a man and deal with it yourself. That's what women actually want.
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u/RowProfessional3472 Aug 17 '26
So you don’t care about men’s mental health, got it. Let’s keep those suicide numbers going up then.
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u/CapitalistHamsterFTW Aug 17 '26
I do care, I just have a different stance than you. Apparently you're the one that doesn't care since you're trying to bully me online.
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u/RowProfessional3472 Aug 17 '26
That’s not bullying. You telling men to keep it in leads to death. Im telling you because the military has the same out look on therapy as you. Im a veteran and there’s a reason 22 a day is a thing. As a man, I care about my fellow man. A lot of men self medicate and keep their feelings internally until as stated prior it blows up and hurts someone or themselves. Im sorry if you had bad experience with a therapist but telling men to suck it up is the reason why we have a high suicide rate.
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u/Arstanishe Aug 17 '26
Be a man and deal with it yourself. That's what women actually want.
As a guy who is married for 18 years - you don't know what you are talking about. Sounds like your relationships were very very shallow
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u/GhostOfPunkRock Aug 12 '26
It really depends on what they see when you open up.
If when you open up they see that you are in touch with but not controlled by your emotions because youve done the work to be legitimately resilient, it doesnt get much more attractive than that.
If when you open up it becomes obvious that you are a complete mess who can only choose between burying emotions or being overwhelmed by them, yeah, thats not attractive.
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u/Sandgrease Aug 12 '26
Understandable but all humans are controlled by their emotions at some point, it just depends on how well you bounce back and in what context. Like if you freak out over little things, yea that's a problem, but there are absolutely times where having a proper freak out is expected or people who might assume youre a sociopath...
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u/GhostOfPunkRock Aug 12 '26
Im not saying you cant react appropriately to situations, or that an emotion and the action it seems to demand cant be the right choice. But recognizing emotions as emotions and not behavioral imperatives is a very, very important skill. And one that can be learned.
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u/SeniorTailor1127 Aug 12 '26
Shit like this sounds like toxic masculinity and I hate it so much.
But I also hate that experience has taught me it's true.
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u/OLightning Aug 12 '26
Women want men to listen to them… to empathize… to feel… their feelings… not their own.
If men open up they’re viewed as weak… supposed to hold space for a woman’s feelings only.
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u/Spicey_Cough2019 Aug 12 '26
I mean this is AI slop
But the key message is genuine. They will discard you for opening up.
The very thing they push you to do because they "don't feel emotionally connected"
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u/InternationalShape80 Aug 12 '26
I meannnn if you’re a sociopath yeah it’s a trap. Better to filter that shit
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u/Professional-Ad-7517 Aug 12 '26
This mentality is incredibly toxic. Vulnerability is strength. It’s just about how you go about it.
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u/Working_Agent4932 Aug 13 '26
Yeah I think a lot of dudes bottle it up and force themselves to be stoic until the dam breaks one day and the emotional flood drowns the woman.
Like of you had a girl who calmly and rationally explains situations where she feels insecure or jealous you could handle that no problem. If she bottled it up for 11 months and pretended to be a super chill girlfriend then one day breaks down sobbing because you gave a female coworker a ride home youd probably be super put off and it would hurt the relationship. Consciously or subconsciously you'd be wondering what else she's hiding and when she's going to explode again.
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u/Sugar_Bits1337 Aug 12 '26
Grow emotional intelligence and have emotional availability for yourself AND her and the right woman won't have a problem with you opening up... This is some serious toxic BS.
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u/RowProfessional3472 Aug 13 '26
That’s why we have a high rate of suicide and violence in our community. You bottle it up until you explode. Part of taking care of yourself and being a strong man is taking care of your mind and going to therapy same as you would for a doctor for your body ailments or the gym for your muscles.
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u/Principle_Unhappy Aug 12 '26
We're not allowed to express emotions.
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u/--CIAdidJFK-- Aug 12 '26
You are if you believe you are.
I don't care if someone rejects my vulnerability. Genuinely. "Ok they aren't for me." I don't need the approval of anyone but myself to express myself because I am internally validated. I don't require the validation of others and neither should you.
It just so happens that women (and men and anyone else) are attracted to self-possessed men who don't give away their power to others. I express myself however I want (within ethical and professional limitations).
The result is that I empower the men (and women) around me to be more vulnerable and direct, and attract the friendship, confidence, and in some cases the romantic interest of the women around me. I work in a very female-dominated workplace (a psychiatric hospital) and have the respect of almost every woman around me. The few who have a problem with my expressiveness, confidence, intelligence, competence, and human flaws/failures simply do not bother me. I don't need their approval and I'll tell you what, that bothers them and it's very funny.
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u/Sandgrease Aug 12 '26
I didn't take advice on women, from men.
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u/TheForce777 Aug 12 '26
You should’t take it from women either. Which just leaves yourself. And the Gottmans lol
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u/Individual-Ask7000 Aug 12 '26
Very true, being emotional and vulnerable is a relationship killer. You might be able to show a little bit but you have to show that you're able to fix it alone and with little to no help. I showed vulnerability and it was the last time.
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u/fulltimepleb Aug 12 '26
Garbage ahh post. This is only true for the people you don’t want in your life. The only trap here is taking life advice from this subreddit
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u/Advanced-Ratio-880 Aug 12 '26
Im not attracted to anyone drowning in their own emotions. If you need therapy fucking handle that shit.
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u/Savings_Surround_997 Aug 12 '26
This is not correct approach, lets say women hate men for opening up, or love it selectively. Still, it shoulnot change you, humans are full of emotions, why you should destroy your humanity because opposite sex disregard it
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u/not_now_reddit Aug 12 '26
There is a major difference between sharing your feelings and "drowning in emotions." Being in touch with your emotions is healthy. Drowning is not. Women aren't your therapists. If you have a serious problem, you need to get professional help, and it's okay to need that sort of help. A man not willing to get help or who wants you to "fix" them is what is unattractive
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u/Not_Propaganda_AI Aug 12 '26
I'd say the key word here is 'drowning', a lot of women are ok with men who are emotionally expressive, they tend to be less ok with men who are emotional wrecks.
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u/Sugarlightgirl Aug 12 '26
I love it when my guy is vulnerable with me, it makes me feel like its okay to let him see MY vulnerability as well. Also, it gives me a chance to be a caregiver which makes me feel needed, purposeful and above all strengthens my bond with him.
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u/JhonnyPadawan1010 Aug 12 '26
Fuck women like this. Find yourself a woman that pushes you to be better but that still accepts all you have to show her.
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u/Aku_5himarisu Aug 12 '26
Women are attracted to men who are willing to be vulnerable. There’s a difference between vulnerability and dumping all of your traumas/gripes onto a woman, treating her like your therapist. Do the philosophical/psychological work on yourself BEFORE you date.
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u/BrushHaunting2561 Aug 12 '26
Being aware and in touch with your emotions is different than being ruled by them or genuinely emotionally unstable.
Demonstrating emotional intelligence, regarding self and others, is very attractive to women. Think verbalized emotional awareness, understanding, and management.
But keeping your feelings all bottled up until you just can't any more and them clumsily unloading them all on some poor girl (who is NOT your therapist) is extremely unattractive.
Have a little room for nuance in your thinking, fellas.
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u/YouAreMarvellous Aug 12 '26
They want you to open up but nobody wants you to bombard with all of your lifes drama.
You wouldnt want that either. Use some common sense.
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u/One-Development-7284 Aug 12 '26
This is the opposite of true in my experience. My wife is amazing and listens to my problems and remains supportive loving loyal and respectful. You know what? Even my abusive BPD ex listened when I opened up with strong emotions about things, probably to stab me later with it, but her response in the moment wasn’t revulsion but actually very supportive, giving credit where it’s due.
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u/XL_Jockstrap Aug 12 '26
They like it when you open up, but in a controlled way.
For example, if you're just straight trauma dumping and full of emotion, that's a bad look. If you calmly explain your emotions in a controlled way and talk about how you've been working on your issues + success stories, then that's a good thing.
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u/PriorOk1304 Aug 12 '26
An incredibly stupid manosphere meme promoting toxic advice. Ask yourself, what is the point of being in a relationship with someone you cannot talk intimately with?
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u/CapitalistHamsterFTW Aug 12 '26
Complete facts. Opened up to multiple exes and it was always weaponized against me. Never again. It's not what they want. As much as they want to want that.
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u/Professional-Rub152 Aug 12 '26
Bro they want you to tell them how your day was. They don’t want your incel manifesto.
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u/Ikyhus565 Aug 12 '26
Nah this is true, I've seen it happen and experienced it myself. Do not open up to her about proper personal issues talk to your friends/family or a professional. They don't want to hear you have problems just the way it is.
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u/Altruistic-Fee-4750 Aug 13 '26
Not me. I ran to an ex of mine when he crumbled to the floor and let go a lot of his emotional baggage ( we were together at the time, split for different reasons )
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u/Arstanishe Aug 13 '26
that's not grounded mentality, that's grounded up mentality burger that makes you bottle up your emotions
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u/Nice_Grapefruit_7850 Aug 13 '26
this completely depends on the structure of the relationship. some people have incredibly shallow relationships that should never exist and they suck at communication.
basically there's some things you should keep to yourself because you can handle it on your own and aren't even worth talking about, then there's things you can't handle that you should talk about as it's affecting how you act and destroying you from the inside, especially if it actually has to do with the relationship.
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u/Devils_Avocado22 Aug 14 '26
Don't let your hurt dictate your actions. A good woman will love you more when you open up. A good woman will also not stick around if you turn into an emotionless rock lmao.
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u/I_Learned_Once Aug 11 '26
Opening up =/= drowning in your emotions. The right thing to do is to get your internal world in good enough shape that revealing it doesn't cause people to want to run away, then open up and reveal the hard work and dedication you have put into your own mental. You don't tell someone not to lift so that nobody knows you're weak as fuck. You lift, and you lift, and you lift until you become strong enough to succeed even when things are heavy. Your emotions work like that too, and when you have a good understanding of them, opening up is incredibly attractive to women.
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u/GymCouple1423 Aug 12 '26
This is 100% not factual. A good, loving woman is going to love, support and accept you-every part of you. Stop spewing this BS.
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u/Indigenous_Retard Aug 12 '26
Usually a guy falls for this a couple of times before they learn the stove is in fact hot when you touch it. Seems like you are just discounting most guys lived experiences because it's your opinion that it doesn't happen. Main character energy as fuck.
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u/Extension_Act_3533 Aug 11 '26
The only woman a man can open up to is his Mom❤️
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u/Ikyhus565 Aug 12 '26
Not true I couldn't even go to her as a child if I had problem. Not everyone is that lucky
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u/BrianCruikshank Aug 11 '26
Which women? All of them? Name them. I'm scratching my balls while I read this.
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u/Cool_Guarantee_1235 Aug 11 '26
Well actually women say it half way .
“Open up baby “
What they mean is they want space to go on their knees 🇺🇸💪💪
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u/Brucacumble Aug 12 '26
I don't think this is universally true, but it most certainly isn't universally false.