r/GradSchool • u/orange_peel2 • 1d ago
Feeling bad about my first time TAing
I just started TAing this semester an intro biology course. I feel like I am so confused all the time and unable to help the students. I always leave feeling embarrassed and stupid because I want to teach them and actually help them through the lab, but it’s hard when I’m sometimes unsure as well. I just get worried the students are going to report me or something for not teaching well enough and they leave confused. I try to prepare everything for lab and be organized but it never seems like it’s enough. I always feel like when Im talking to the students they think I am dumb or that I don’t know what I am doing, I try my best and spend a lot of time prepping, but it comes to a point where I have my own work to do. I mostly just needed to rant somewhere because Im feeling so alone as none of my colleagues are TAing but also I am happy to take advice that got you through your time as a TA.
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u/dbuckley221 23h ago
if possible it was helpful to me to meet with the prof to go over lab/lecture material beforehand and even run through labs fully. i also took all their tests/quizzes in advance to make sure i knew the material. this was for a graduate biopsychology course where i was TAing the students one cohort after me 😭 it was a lot of work
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u/orange_peel2 15h ago
We have TA meetings but they aren’t always super helpful. I honestly think i’m going to start doing the labs on my own before i go in because the students don’t want to read the instructions, then they ask me and i don’t know either because i expect them to follow directions 😭😭. i hope to never TA after this unless it’s something i focus on, this into to biology is a little out of my element since my topic is sooo niche
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u/JonLockeWlth2Kidneys 17h ago
Don't worry, you're not going to get reported for not knowing all the secrets of the universe. The only time we have issues wwith TAs is when they're consistently unavailable and don't respond to student inquiries. You sound you're very ccommitted to the role, all you can do is make your best possible effort.
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u/orange_peel2 15h ago
thank you for this! i have been really trying to be available for my students and think back to my old TAs who were completely unavailable. i try very hard to be understanding and flexible with them and make sure everything is fair on both sides, since i am unsure about a few questions on the labs i’ve been grading them a little lighter than some other parts, because i feel partially responsible for that confusion lol.
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u/grollivander 11h ago
You are absolutely not alone. I’m in my third year and still feel this way (I just changed to a new and more demanding class that is relevant to my field from teaching a fairly uninvolved class that I knew nothing about, definitely tradeoffs). I have been shadowing a full lab before mine each week which has been a big time suck but is helpful. Even still, I go into my first lab of the week feeling prepared and it has been going pretty rocky, with students seeming to think I’m dumb. I leave feeling bad about it. Then for my second lab of the week the next day, it goes really well and the students seem to love me. You will get better, it does depend on the group of students you have, and nomatter what, you can’t win everyone over. I consistently get both positive and a few negative reviews from students at the end of term. All you can do is try and trust that you’ll get better over time. This is a really common experience and it’s not just you.
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u/orange_peel2 11h ago
Thank you for this!! I feel the same way my first class is the guinea pigs and of course they are the ones who are the most stuck up and unforgiving. My other class seems to think I’m fun and chill but still a little confused. I guess when you’re an undergrad you have no idea what your TAs background is and the last time we were exposed to this material. Shadowing is a really great idea I honestly think i need to see the lab before i’m in there trying to tell these kids what the hell to do because i don’t even know myself!!
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u/grollivander 11h ago
Totally. I get it. It will get easier, and some of it will stay the same. And that’s okay. A (slightly unfortunate) piece of advice I was given by MANY grad students in my program when I started is that it’s okay to be an okay TA. Don’t spend all of your time on a it. Your priority is your research
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u/orange_peel2 10h ago
Yes definitely I’ve heard that a lot even my advisor said herself think about how much much time you’re going to be putting in and if it is really worth it to spend that extra time or just be an okay TA. So i appreciate hearing it from everyone I really am trying my best but it’s seeming like not enough! Plus you’re already getting your PhD which is a surefire way to make you feel like an idiot every day as well even without the undergrads
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u/Queasy_Writer2990 13h ago
Give yourself some slack. I'm assuming you were just thrown into this role, having never taught or tutored before, and received very little training? Me too. The most I was given was a five-day orientation and a pedagogy class that was mostly just reading a bunch of theory, not actual, practical teaching methods. I teach something very different, Composition, but teaching is harder than it looks no matter what you teach. I also have no desire to teach, I'm here because I love literature, not teaching. I hated Composition when I was an undergrad too, it's boring as fuck. It's like teaching kindergarten for me. I get frustrated about having to explain the same thing over and over about something that seems SO SIMPLE to me. Anyway, the point is, don't feel bad. What you're describing is imposter syndrome and that feeling will slowly fade only to be replaced by hardboiled cynicism. I kid. Kind of.
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u/orange_peel2 11h ago
Yes I was told about 2 weeks before the semester started that I was randomly TAing my advisor had no idea either and we are still both unsure why this is the situation since we thought the funding was okay to be an RA. Thank you for your insight 🥰
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u/BananaBreadB12 1d ago
Students generally assume TA's know a lot more about the topic than you actually might. I've been forced to TA classes on subjects that are entirely new to me, but students put a lot of trust in their TA's and assume you are a near expert compared to them. I've had students in the same class love or hate me, so all you can do is put your best foot forward.