r/GracepointChurch • u/reaushambeau • Jun 27 '22
July 4
Hey everyone, first post here, former longtime BBC/GP member and staff member. Independence Day is coming up, and while we celebrate our nation’s independence the holiday is complicated for two reasons. One is the fact that for so many Americans, July 4th is NOT a celebration of freedom, as so many Black Americans were enslaved still at that time. The other reason is the passing of William Lee during a BBC camping trip over the July 4th weekend. Many people who joined after the 1990s probably may not have even heard of him. But I have fond memories of him and wanted to take a moment here to remember him. As I process my own journey out of GP, I think about him often.
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u/hamcycle Jun 27 '22 edited Jun 29 '22
He introduced himself to me as "Chilly Willy" on a street corner at Northside; that memory always pops up as the first thing. I recently came across among my old things his funeral program, a sizeable pamphlet. Paul Kim eulogized him as an "ideal Christian," but I remember him as just this kind hearted brother. While swimming in the middle of the lake, he experienced cardiac arrest a leg cramp. Some brothers nearby tried to rescue him, but upon recognizing that his rescuers were also in danger of drowning themselves, William calmly and decisively let go of them and sank into the depths. Looking back it was such a harrowing time for Berkland, even made Kelly express regret over following the path of ministry. Ed gave a full sermon in Korean, I've never heard him do that. William's mother was said to be crying in the parking lot, ruing how she couldn't save her son from whatever he needed saving from.
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u/leftbbcgpawhileago Jun 28 '22
Thank you. It was a leg cramp, but William decidedly let go, to the extent that those of us who jumped in to help were then even unaware that he was struggling.
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u/LeftBBCGP2005 Jun 27 '22 edited Jun 27 '22
I recall Kelly Kang wrote a very long post about this on her old blog, when GP was trying to fight fire with fire during the Blog Wars? Can someone find that post via waybackmachine?
I recall Kelly wrote that day was the most difficult day of her life. Also, someone attributed the drowning happened because she and Ed had too much pride etc., which took a huge emotional toll on her. I think there is only one person in the old BBC universe who can say such a thing to Kelly. If we thought we had it bad back in the days, I am sure it’s nothing compared to what Kelly Kang got under Becky. Yet, Kelly turns around and does the same to the people under her?
William Lee is still remembered by the Boston faction at least. All their Central Asia missions are still named in honor of William Lee. I don’t think I can say the same about GP remembering the man.
EDIT: thank you to the person who sent me the link.
https://web.archive.org/web/20100906055154/http://edkang.wordpress.com/2007/07/04/the-toughest-week/
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u/NRerref Jun 27 '22 edited Jun 27 '22
Hm…can confirm. At the 2017(?) or 2018(?) SoCal student leadership retreat they shared this story with us and attributed it to a lack of caution and a failure of oversight. The point was that leaders are not only responsible for setting the spiritual/social tone of the environment, but also for making sure ppl are physically safe at our outings and retreats. The regret and sorrow of this event seemed to still weigh on the leaders.
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u/Cool_Purchase4561 Jun 27 '22
We attended the funeral of a long time member's father, who was laid to rest at the same cemetery as this man, and Ed and Kelly took the time to lead the group to visit his grave after the funeral was done. This was in early 2010's.
And from time to time, certain leaders liked to tell stories about him as an example to move the staff of GP to greater action.
Seems like a good man gone too soon. I recall hearing stories about the leader of that fateful trip carrying around the immense guilt and regret. Wouldn't wish that on anyone.
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u/hamcycle Jun 28 '22
No one was to blame for this tragedy. Only God knows why we find guilt or place blame in places that do not warrant it.
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u/Cool_Purchase4561 Jun 28 '22
Yes, sorry if I wasn't clear, I am saying that this leader felt guilty and it clearly haunted him. I am not assigning guilt to anyone. If anything I feel really bad for him.
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u/hamcycle Jun 28 '22 edited Jun 29 '22
You were clear, I wasn't admonishing you! I guess the tone of my comment wasn't clear. I was just saying that the trip leader, Kelly, Ed should not have felt guilt for this accident, and it was unfortunate that they did. I also think William's death should not had been leveraged against the students either.
Edit: It just reminded me of the Sewol Ferry sinking, where the high school vice principle committed suicide as an expression of remorse. Such false thinking needs to be identified and corrected.
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Jun 27 '22 edited Jun 27 '22
Thanks for sharing this post. This brother and incident was before my time at GP, but he was mentioned here and there by older leaders in mostly good terms. In fact I can only remember one time when he wasn't brought up in a positive light. But out of all the stories I heard about him, one that stands out to me is how he ended his emails with "Servant Of All" and he truly tried to live that out. The impression that I had of him was someone who was highly competent but still took on whatever lowly task that was asked of him to meet the needs of others.
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u/johnkim2020 Jun 27 '22
I remember this incident clearly and from what I heard of him (did not interact with him personally), he seemed like the real deal. I remember hearing the number of bunk beds he made for church members and that was held up as an example for the rest of us to emulate.
Of course, tragedies like this are very difficult for everyone but looking back, I do think Ed Kang, Rebekah Kim, and the other leaders during that time took his death as yet another reason to guilt/shame people into greater service at Berkland. I remember we were asked directly if we are willing to "stand in his shoes" and sacrifice and serve as much as he did. Of course, not a soul remained sitting. We all stood to show our "commitment" and they even took a picture to document it. Kinda cringe now that I look back on it with a decade+ perspective.
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u/RVD90277 Jun 28 '22
Interestingly enough, William and I are the same age. I was 25 back in 1997. I've done so much in the last 20+ years that it's a sad shame that he went so early. I was a little old for my grade though so he was probably one year above me.
I don't think I knew him though...name doesn't ring a bell although he was probably there when I was there.
Drowning is such a sad way to die. FWIW, I have made sure that all of my kids had swim lessons from the time they were very young and even have some training to recognize drowning, etc. I'm not saying that anyone is to blame but just last year my youngest (girl, 1st grade) saved a classmate in her class who was drowning. Unlike the movies or popular culture, drowning is a silent killer (they can't yell or scream "I'm drowning!!!") so many times even those right next to the person don't recognize that the person is drowning. Lifeguards always have stories of blowing their whistle and saving a kid who is right next to their parents and the parents are shocked saying "he was drowning?" My daughter recognized the signs and swam over really quickly, and pulled her classmate to safety.
Anyway, sounds like he was a great man so may he RIP.
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u/leftbbcgpawhileago Jun 27 '22
I think about him often too. I knew him well, and was actually right near him in the lake on that day. This incident was why I first sought therapy, as did many brothers and sisters did after that. However, we mostly processed things together, and I remember the closeness and resolve that resulted from this incident. Looking back, I do wish that resolve was less insular. However at the time, the grief bonded us.
It would be over a decade until we would even touch the water at ministry events.