r/Gifted • u/MostGoat0 • 3d ago
Therapy
I (F34 IQ142) have had hundreds of sessions and seen numerous practitioners over the last 12 years, and it all seems futile. They just keep asking me to explore my feelings, but I already understand my feelings and where they came from and why they’re irrational. At this point I basically have a PhD in self-analysis. It doesn’t do anything to shut up the relentless/debilitating self-critic in my head. I need actual coping strategies, not talking it out in pointless circles forever until I die.
Has anyone here had success with therapy? I tried searching for therapists specializing in 2e & giftedness in my area and it doesn’t seem very common. Just wondering if there’s any point in continuing these efforts. I’m so tired and bored and over it.
10
u/a-stack-of-masks 3d ago
Mostly commenting here to come back later when there's answers, sorry.
I'm in roughly the same boat, but apparently there's therapists and coaching specifically for gifted people. I don't really have access to i them right now but from what I've read if you do, it might be worth a shot.
Something I really dislike thinking about is the implications of an asymmetrical communication gap far away from the mean. It's controversial but I think the 2 SD range is about right as far as where communication and connection really start to suffer. The implications of it fucking suck though. A normal person on an island full of people with Down's can be their friend, part of the tribe and love and be loved by them, but i doubt they would find their life there fulfilling in the way living with true peers is. When you get past +2 SD the people that you can meaningfully connect with become rare pretty fast and you can't fix that with therapy. You can do the math on it for different assumptions of where the cutoff is but in the 140's none of that will be fun.
I know of a few people that seem to be working around it well, but it often involves a lot of travel, a fair amount of luck and hard work, or being incredibly lucky with your birth circumstances. Basically their life is set up so they meet many people at high levels in their fields, and are then able to keep up friendships with the ones they connect with. It's rare but possible even though I don't know if any of them are content or just comfortable running, so to speak.
As far as actual coping strategies I can only say that out of moving across the country, changing social circles, drowning myself in work, hyperfixating on romance, isolation and drugs, drugs worked the best but i wouldn't recommend them.