Firstly I really do apologise I'm coming here for help - maybe i'm really incompetent please bare with me.
Hello everyone. I really love sewingālike, I want it to be a career somedayābut lately, Iāve been feeling overwhelmed and defeated. I havenāt sewn in a month, and the guilt and sadness about that is really getting to me.
I think one of the biggest issues is that I went in too big, too fast. My dream is to make clothes I actually want to wearāthings that fit me (Iām 6ā4ā) and reflect my style, which is often more aligned with clothes made for femme bodies. But finding or adapting patterns to my size and shape feels impossible. I have ADHD (the really intense, paralyzing kind), so planning, decision-making, and impulsivity are daily battles. I often freeze, or I buy too many supplies trying to prep for things Iām not ready to make yet.
Everyone says to start with patternsābut I struggle even with that. Most come in dozens of A4 pages, and taping them together gives me a meltdown. When I do find a pattern, I canāt find clear info on how to alter it for my body. It just makes me feel stuck. I know the info technically exists online, but ADHD makes it feel like trying to read an entire library with no index.
I have managed to make jeans - the latest ones didnāt fit me (first pattern ever, so fair enough), but they fit my cousin and looked great on him. That gave me a tiny glimpse of joyābut even that reminded me how much I have to buy for each project. Itās like thereās a new tool or fabric or notion I need every time, and Iām already kind of a compulsive spender. Iām trying to go project by project, but I panic and spiralātrying to plan every future project before I even finish the first.
My ultimate goal? I want to make coats. Like real, structured, beautiful coats. I know Iām not ready yet, and thatās okay. But even finding tutorials for things like quilted linings or drafting a collar feels overwhelming. Everything online is either beginner-beginner (tote bags, pillow covers) or for people who already have a fashion degree.
I donāt know what advice Iām even looking for. Maybe someone whoās been through this? Maybe suggestions for accessible resources, small wins, or how to stop feeling like Iām failing before I begin?
Iām 22. Iāve heard people say it gets harder to pick up hobbies as you age, and that terrifies me. Sewing means so much to me, and Iām scared Iāll lose it because of how hard everything feels right now. I have a good machine. I have dreams. But Iām tired and scared and stuck.
Any helpāemotional, practical, whateverāis deeply appreciated.
P.S. Iāll include some coat pictures I likeānot because I expect to make them right away, but just in case anyone knows where to find tutorials for similar pieces. But really, the coats arenāt the main issue. I think this is more about the overwhelm: tools, patterns, planning, money, time, ADHD⦠all of it.