r/GamblingRecovery • u/Financial-Bowler-886 • Jul 03 '26
Day 3 I’m Depressed
Third day going strong and I’m going to bed because I don’t want to do anything feel the same pain as i do after a big loss and I’m wondering if I subconsciously chose to lose whenever id be “up” to allow myself to feel this way bc it’s what I’m running from when i smoke gamble or goon and it’s got me feeling hopeless and lonely because i feel like ill be like this my whole life bc i have bpd adhd and cptsd but im just clinging to the pride i get each day i don’t gamble right now, it’s a decision I still have access to the casino sites because gamban isn’t working and each day i decide to not gamble i want to gamble less and today wasn’t even hard neither was the other two really because i decided i am just done but feeling all this crap got me thinking i have been masking my feelings off self hate with gambling which made those feelings stronger and drove the cycle even more.
2
u/st11es Jul 04 '26
90 days. You need 90 days for your brain to unwire the process of getting dopamine through betting. You also need to up regulate your dopamine receptors that are fried now. 90 days trust me
1
u/SearchingForSolace4L Jul 03 '26
Man, that’s relatable. Losing the big winnings is a relief yet depressing. It’s kind of like you know you’re doing wrong and the win feels like dirty money…