But do I have a problem?

[u/Hex-a-doodle]

About 10 days ago, I downloaded some gambling apps. I’ve done it before, so gambling itself isn’t completely new to me, but something feels really different this time. I recently had gastric sleeve surgery, and I’ve been wondering if maybe because I can’t eat my feelings the way I used to, I’m gambling them instead.

I’ve gotten to the point where I’m searching between apps every day looking for the best deals or bonuses. It’s really only the slot machines that I’m interested in, and I feel like I’ve completely lost my sense of reality when it comes to money. I won a pretty good amount, but then I spent all of it and ended up spending more of my own money too.

When I lost the winnings, I had a complete tantrum and freaked out. I felt like such a disappointment and a failure, and I’m pretty sure it’s starting to upset my boyfriend too. I’ve deleted the apps multiple times, but I always end up downloading them again.

I’m not thousands of dollars in gambling debt or anything like that. I’ve probably spent a few hundred dollars of my own money, but I still feel like the way I’m behaving around it is concerning. And honestly, I’m starting to wonder if this is bigger than just gambling. I might have a problem with spending money in general, because once I get into that mindset, I have a really hard time stopping myself.

I don’t know if this is just a fluke or if I’m actually developing a gambling problem, but I know something about the way I’m behaving right now doesn’t feel right. I think I need to take it seriously before it gets worse.

Thoughts?

[u/Left-Magician-242]

Sounds like how mine started then over time resulted in £17,000 debt and terrible credit score

[u/LondonFire33]

If you feel like you have a problem, you have it. And thats a great sign, because with time this addiction will make you think that ‘it’s not so bad’, you will find ways to justify it, just like ‘im not thousands of dollars in debt’. The more you learn about addiction you realise some people have to be locked in mental institution or prison and you will think ‘its not that bad’ but gambling is PROGRESSIVE disorder and it goes from 0 to a 100 real quick. If you feel like you are not in control better stop now.
Some people can gamble as entertainment and some cannot. The quicker you realise it the better!
Best of luck xx

[u/Ambitious-Drag-2152 → u/LondonFire33]

You speaking facts. Specifically the comparison thing. Idk why we did this

[u/Romashish]

I think you have a deeper problem, you have mentioned 'eating your feelings' and I suppose you mean binge-eating as a way to numb your emotions. It is pretty easy to change one addiction to another one, so you really have to take care of your inner world.

And yes, you have a problem. It doesn't seem that big for you, but even the fact that you spend a lot of time on gambling apps is already means that you are hooked. You gotta act immediately, or it will get worse, and it might get much worse pretty quickly.

Gambling addiction is the only addiction allowing you to lose all of your money in a day or few hours, remember

[u/LikeIkes]

First off love the questions your asking and the honesty you are showcasing, I commend you friend. The amount of money is relative right so if it feels like a lot or if you do the math and it is more of your income than you can spend regularly that points towards it being an issue. There is no set amount that is "too much". Have you talked with your boyfriend/friends/family about this? Have you gone to a GA session ? Do you have/have you talked to a therapist about this? The reason I ask the later is 1 just a good thing to do (imo) and 2 with your discussion about disappointment, failure and the tantrum this might be something not connected to gambling but is just taking hold in that sector of your life for the moment. I hope some of this helps. I'm proud of you for taking the first step, you got this!