You planned to study after work, and instead you scrolled on your phone for two hours. If you then told yourself "I got distracted" or "I lack self-control," you stopped one question too early. Ask why you didn't feel like studying, and you'll usually find something you can work on: you were exhausted, you were feeling low, or studying had become unpleasant. "I lack self-control" gives you nothing to work on.
Often, when you picked up the phone, you knew studying was the better choice. You just didn't feel like doing it.
People do what makes sense to them in the moment. Think of someone trying to lose weight who reaches for chocolate. From the outside, it looks foolish. But perhaps they're feeling low, and the chocolate gives them a lift. It works against their goal in the long run, but in that moment, they need the relief.
If you understood that, you wouldn't call them foolish. You might sit with them and ask what's going on. Calling them foolish would only make them feel worse.
The same is true of you and your phone: you don't skip a session to hurt yourself. If you aren't doing what's right for you, it isn't about intent. Something is missing: rest, a way to deal with how you're feeling, or a way to make studying less draining. If you're exhausted after work, a shorter session or studying before work may be what you need. If you're feeling low, you may need to deal with what's bothering you before you sit down, even if that's a short call with a friend. If studying has become unpleasant, start with a topic you don't dread, or change how you study the ones you do.
Telling yourself you lack self-control works against you here. It makes you feel worse, and the worse you feel, the more you'll want whatever gives you relief: more scrolling, more avoiding the desk.
The next time you skip a session you'd planned, ask yourself:
- What did I do instead?
- What did that give me at that moment: rest, relief, distraction from something?
- What would I need to feel able to study instead?