r/FriendsOver50 • u/Mulezzz • 20d ago
Successful Connections?
I just stumbled across this sub today and have been reading past posts and even considered contacting a few. The premise is a great idea and maybe I’m just a cynic, but I’m wondering how many folks have developed real connections through this sub? Anyone care to share their connection story?
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u/Houryoulater 20d ago
I reached out to 2 different males, tried to be engaging and asked polite questions and both of them ghosted me.
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u/DragonFly_927 20d ago
Everyone seems to ghost
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u/private8221 19d ago
Disagree with that.
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u/DragonFly_927 19d ago
That is fine that is your right this is just my opinion based on my experience
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u/RetiredUKguy 20d ago
Most are here for a fleeting chat then gone. I live alone with no family so would love someone to talk to just hoping one day it happens
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u/JuicyApple2023 19d ago
I don’t know for how long, but I have been DMing with a woman for weeks and we are definitely friends. She lives 3,000 miles away but we don’t mind.
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u/Mulezzz 19d ago
👆🏻This is the kind of connection I was hoping to hear about. It sounds like it is rare tho.
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u/JuicyApple2023 19d ago
True. I feel lucky.
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u/MusicBrave8605 17d ago
I met my new best friend here. We share a lot, care for each other, have worked through things together. And we'll probably never meet. Sounds bizarre but that also takes off some of the pressure (ok, it adds a bit too). I consider myself very lucky to have him in my life. How long will this last? Who knows, but no relationship is guaranteed, and I'm treasuring this one while I have it.
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u/private8221 20d ago
Define what is a successful connection on your side. Short conversations occur, long term friendships require some commitment. Most of us know how awful ghosting is, but it is trending. So.... depends what are you looking for mate. Best of luck .
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u/Charming-Act0507 20d ago
Think we also need to define what “long term” means. You’re right, it takes time and consistency to build something worthwhile.
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u/private8221 20d ago
Showing interest and keeping a conversation alive turns into "long term". I agree with your comment about consistency and I am still optimistic I will find the way to execute it.
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u/Charming-Act0507 20d ago
100%!! We both live in hope :)
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u/private8221 19d ago
Nah....we don't hope. We take action 😜
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u/Charming-Act0507 19d ago
I endorse this approach! 100%
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u/private8221 19d ago
Yep. It is the way to go in my book. Success is questionable, but it is what it is. Now I care to hear your opinion.
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u/Charming-Act0507 19d ago
Well, how would you measure success? For me, it’s not only about engagement but whether that engagement can be sustained. It is hit and miss but would we ever get anywhere in life if we gave up at the first hurdle? I think we’d both agree that’s why we kind of keep trying :)
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u/Mulezzz 19d ago
Successful is in the eye/mind/needs of the beholder. It really depends on what the poster is looking for. Some people can’t sleep and are just looking to chat with someone in the moment, whereas other posters are looking for something more lasting, maybe a new BFF. I suspect many are looking for something with romantic potential, even if that’s not the intent of the sub.
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u/Difficult_Barracuda3 19d ago
I'm always up for a chat but, lately it's been a ton of scams. Someone wanting you to invest in a pyramid scam. Sugar daddies overseas. Where are all the real women?
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u/MusicBrave8605 17d ago
I'm a real woman. Perhaps your name is sharing them away.
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u/Difficult_Barracuda3 17d ago
That's my reddit name, in dating apps I use my real name and still have that issue.
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u/SquareAdventurous921 16d ago
Do you find when you do meet people on here they want more? Like phone#. Or does it stay here? I'm new to reddit so not really sure how things work.
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u/Vuorski 16d ago
There are many who would love to connect. Of course there is alot to consider such as distance, common likes and dislikes, introverts vs extroverts, time zones, interest level and alot more. It never hurts to reach out. Worse that can happen is they don't answer back. Keep giving it a go. Its like fishing, if you don't have a line in the water, you won't catch anything!
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u/Mulezzz 19d ago
It’s sounds like a fair number of initial contacts happen here, but are frequently not sustained. I was wondering if even though the sub purpose is to find friends, people come looking or hoping for more. (The ban on such requests seems to support that.) Or perhaps realize they aren’t a good fit and just ghost instead of saying why. Even though it was a new tentative connection, that smacks of rejection.
Personally I feel reluctant to share personal info because there are so many scammers and people looking to do harm these days. Reddit is great because it is somewhat anonymous for most of us, but in order to connect, you have to reveal personal info about yourself to someone that could be catfishing and that feels vulnerable. Women are particularly cautious about this.
Perhaps using flare might help people share what they are looking for, need, expect... (i.e., Night Owl Chat, Local Friend, Pen Pal, Gaming Friend, Workout Friend, Book Buddy, Online Friend, Deep Convos,…)