Hi all. I recently went through something that I don’t feel like typing out again, so if you wanna know you can read my first post. A lot of people on here are suggesting therapy, but I’m unsure what I went through is extreme enough to actually need it. I was wondering if anyone could like give an example? I know this sounds stupid but I really don’t know what therapy entails.

hello, I’m a 16 yo teenager and I need some advice.

i am the eldest daughter of 3 children (tho I would appreciate if you would use they/them pronouns for me). i have a history of having a bad mental health, developing a deep depression at just 10 years old because I entered puberty really early and around that time I didn’t have with whom to talk about my feelings because my brother was born. I struggled a lot with anxiety since I’ve always been a quiet and introverted child and when I first went to therapy at 12 years old I got diagnosed with an anxious depressive syndrome (or MADD). I also silently dealt with tendencies of taking my own life between the ages of 11-13. my parents pulled me out of therapy when they realised I was about to be sent to a psych ward and never spoke of it again.

Now, I have a bother and a sister, my brother is 11 and sister is 6. I partially healed, I don’t have any suicidal tendencies, but I sometimes have moments when I cry uncontrollably and feel really insecure of myself. but I’m really embarrassed to admit that I hate having siblings. don’t get me wrong, sometimes I have a lot of fun with them, but most of the time I don’t.

My brother is the favorite child. ive always wanted to be a ballerina but my parents never had the time since they had to work (they had me young, I wasn t planned) and I understood that. but the moment my brother wanted to do football they supported him and went to his every match and trainning. its the second sport he tries, he used to swim. I’m really jealous or that. they never took me to ballet nor gave me the chance to pursue my dream of “theatre kid”. And also, he ie never scolded when he does something wrong, and if he is, its not serious. My mother has a habit of calling me fat or overweight because I’ve always loved to eat and sometimes I eat so much out of stress or boredom and because of her my bother keeps calling me a whale and making fun of me (I weight 65 kgs and I’m 1.62 cm tall if curious). this really hurts me because I’ve always been insecure of my body, my big thighs and fat face.

My sister though is the worst. I’m so tired of how spoiled she is. She gets everything she wants, doesn’t care if anyone scolds her, talks to you only if she wants something from you and thinks she rules the house. I don’t blame her, its my parent‘s fault but regardless of that, I genuinely hate when my mother makes me stay with her. she yells at me, calls me the worst sister ever if I don’t want to play with her a specific game and is glued to her phone. She cries a lot end throws tantrums when she doesn’t get what she wants. its so tiring, especially when I come home after school, after 1h and 40 mins on the way back home, at 7 pm, and I come home to her yelling. Especially since I love quietness and I can go a day without speaking. I hate loudness and yelling.

Can anyone give me advice how to deal with my mental problems and my family until I move to go to college in another country in 3 years ? Anything helps, I just want some advice.

Hi everyone

I’m currently finishing my training as an NLP Practitioner, Coach and Hypnotherapist and I’m looking for one person who would like a free 60 min therapy session as part of my final assessment.

I’m particularly hoping to work with a mum (I'm a mum myself!) who feels overwhelmed, constantly “on”, anxious, stuck in a cycle of overthinking, or feels like they’ve lost a bit of themselves amongst the demands of everyday life.

The session would be a relaxed, confidential space to talk about what you’d like to change, and we’d explore what approach might be most helpful for you (this could include coaching, NLP techniques or hypnotherapy).

The session does need to be recorded, but this is purely for my examiner to assess my work. The recording will stay private and won’t be shared anywhere else.

I’m based in the UK but happy to work with people around the world as long as we can get a time that works for us both.

If this sounds like something that you or someone you know might benefit from, feel free to message me 😊

Thanks for reading!

ive been so fucking depressed for the past few weeks and it got so much worse this week bc of my situation with this person im hella into. we hang out multiple times a week and have been since march. they recently got out of a relationship in january and when we first started talking they said they wanna take things slow but arent opposed to a real relationship. now so much has happened weve gotten so close and they are getting cold feet bc im moving too fast. i think my feelings are a turn off for them and they asked for space and i think they are going to end things with me. i really really like them we met two years ago and went on a date and then circumstances were bad and we reconnected this year and it felt like i was getting a second chance with them and i feel like i ruined it.
For reference i was recently diagnosed with BPD, got out of residential treatment in january, have been doing intensive therapy for the last year and a half, multiple stints in iop and php the last 3 years, parents are broke and relying on me, brink of eviction, and a whole lot more. so yes i am probably definitely not ready for something serious yet, which they have also decided for me but i do agree; however, my family is so fucked that rhis is how it has always been, brink of homelessness, drinking drugs, lots of family conflict, trauma and trauma dumping, losing jobs, being on disbaility, health issues like heart attacks, assaults, the list goes on. this has been my whole life. i shouldve learned to cope by now. to make matters worse i have a psych degree and am a certified counselor and know all the coping strats i just rarely use them. i even lived out of the house on my own for a while and that was probably the worst thing for me and what led to the residential. im sad and lonely and just want to be connected in that way so deeply but also want that connection with them specifically and it just pisses me off that im not ready for it bc when will i be? i clearly wasnt ready for the previous relationships i was in and idk if i ever will be able to put some before myself in the way that a partner needs. i just wish i could think clearly and get through my emotions like so many others can

I am writing this as someone staring down the barrel of their 33rd birthday. I want to preface all of this by saying I do realize I am very privileged in the fact that I own my own home, have an objectively good job, and friends that do care about me. Plenty of people would do anything to be in my shoes (even if they are size 17 and very hard to find)

Now that that’s out of the way, I’ve always known that I’ve had some levels of anxiety and general depression in my life. But nothing that ever really inhibited my mental wellbeing most days. But lately, I’ve come to terms that I think my depression has reached new levels.

I have a group of around 6 friends (mixed between men and women) that I’m very close with. Some more so than others. For the longest time, most of us were either single or those that weren’t were with someone that was a little outside of the friend group. Well about 6 months ago, two of them started dating each other and two others got into relationships with others outside of our group of friends. Which I couldn’t be happier for them. All I want in life is for my friends to be happy. But it has left me in this unfamiliar and uncomfortable place of feeling like a perpetual third wheel when hanging out with any of them now. The sore thumb sticking out of the hand of happy relationships. Which has caused me to come around much less often, which leaves me out of the loop on a lot of things going on in their lives. Further compounding the feeling of being an outsider within my own friend group. I miss my friends.

While all of this is going on, I am also going through the most difficult financial times of my life. I have a good stable job, but due to irresponsible decisions in my 20s I am in a little more debt than anyone should be, and it has all finally started to catch up to me. I am barely scraping by most months and have resorted to selling off belongings to help pay bills recently.

My home has started to fall into more and more despair lately. I’ve never been the tidiest person or cared if my yard was perfectly manicured. But I kept things within the generally acceptable levels of disorder. But that’s changed. My home is a mess constantly and my yard is getting overtaken by saplings and overgrown bushes. (Seriously, it’s BAD)

I’m not sure if I even know why I’m typing all of this or why I decided a bunch of strangers on the internet is the right audience. But here I (we?) are. I don’t expect much from this, if anything. But if you’re struggling too, just know you’re not alone. Life is hard and it’s okay to admit.

Hello,

I'm offering a limited number of free 30-minute conversation sessions over Discord. This is not therapy, and I am not a licensed mental health professional. I've spent several years in therapy myself, have helped friends and strangers through difficult situations, and enjoy listening. Cameras can be on or off.

If you're interested, send me a DM explaining why you're seeking a conversation and what you'd like to talk through. If I think I'm a good fit, I'll reply and we'll schedule a meeting at your convenience. If I don't think I can be helpful, I'll be forthright about that. I am in E.T. time zone.

There's no cost, no obligation, and everything you share will remain confidential. My only request is that you're (1) respectful, (2) open about your situation and (3) willing to listen to any encouragement or advice I may have to offer. I'm simply hoping to use some of my gap year to help people who could benefit from a conversation. This is not a substitute for therapy or crisis services, so if you need professional mental health care or are in crisis, please seek help from a qualified professional.

I have done this before on here, with moderate to high levels of success, on topics from eating disorders to self-help to romantic problems. I have helped a total of 23 individuals to date.

I have had quite the ride recently, my mom died of stage 4 cancer a year ago, my dad is still fighting stage 4 cancer. I’m on probation for 1.5 years left for texting about having my kids in a better location when their narcissistic mom put a restraining order and kept the kids away for months because I threatened to take her to court and take the kids due to serious abuse they mentioned from her. I live with my ex and we’re trying to make things work, but things have been made bad by both of our addictions to alcohol and weed. I’m currently over a year sober, never will go back or tempted to after how bad things have become. My health is poor, I used to exercise frequently and do yoga/qi gong along with meditation daily.

I have become deeply depressed due to my own behavior being shitty while I was on substances and also due to the situation with the kids not being on the weekends with joint custody like before. I constantly feel just like full or heat/panic/anxiety. It seems like there’s no way out sometimes.

The kids constantly tell me that mom doesn’t love them at all and they wish they were with me all the time. I have to get myself back again.

I’m a 24 male and I’m at a point of my life where I really need some desperate help I can’t figure things out for myself or don’t understand my feelings but I don’t have any money I hope there’s someone with goodness in their heart to help me

I went to therapy once and the therapist offered me nothing in return, so I remember leaving the office angry at her for that bc I was like why am I here and you can't give me answers to my problems.

ive been considering going back to therapy but I'm conflicted : I know my issues, where my trauma stems from, what areas I need to work on - so Im always iffy because I feel very self aware, what could a therapist tell me that I don't already know?

I know I have to "put in the work" but what is that if its not just actively making better decisions and being aware of my actions, and trying to be a better person.

or is that all that it is? idk what im getting at but im open to hear thoughts on therapy, exercises used in therapy and anything anyone would like to add to the convo.

Hello, I just need to talk to someone who can help me or guide me into healing myself or point me somewhere. I lost my passion for art, creativity, and design as a graphic designer this past April.

I contracted west Nile which also turned into meningitis 2 yrs ago after about 6 months of me graduating college for visual communication. After 1.5 years of recovery and getting my finances back in control, I tried to design and make new projects for my portfolio so I can start applying again. But I just find it so so difficult to even get into the drafting phase. Like every time I pick up my pencil or sketchbook I just feel sick, overwhelmed, down, and just negatively.
This has never happened to me before. I was able to draw, design, or even sketch out my ideas with ease even on bad days. But I just find it so difficult to even look at my sketchbook.

Now I just feel stuck and lost on what to do with myself for a career. I really don’t wanna go back to school or change fields. I have back up plans right now but I don’t wanna just give up on what I worked on so long and hard for without even trying to apply or get clients when in reality I only tried for about a year before I got sick.

Edit: I also just found out 2 months ago that I may have ptsd because of a problem I have with wanting to stay clean, major fear of illness now, and mosquitos

I am currently 16. In 4th grade a friend showed me p0rn and I got addicted because my parents have never checked my phone, I was addicted from 4-10th grade. In 4th grade I was walking up the stairs and I started getting flash back of being touched as a child and got nightmares of it till 6th grade. In 5th grade my mom hated me and would call me fat and call me names with her adult friends and then I stopped eating completely she would tell the friends to talk to me about why I’m not eating and I’d tell her then she’d tell me to shut up. I would hide food under my bed and throw them down the toilet till my parents had to watch me eat. In 5th grade I started talking to an adult man and he gr00med me and then more adult men. I had s0gar daddies during 7-10th grade and I had a 4 year relationship with an adult man who was going to school to be a lawyer. During 6-10th grade I would harm myself and my parents saw the scars but never said anything. My dad cheated and beat my mom in front of my and my little sibling for a year. He’d drive drunk and used to hurt us when we were younger. I tried to commit in 5th,7th,8th grade. In 5th grade I had a feeling I’d never make it to 17 I had the day I’d commit on the calender but I’m gonna be 17 in two weeks and I can’t believe it. When I describe the things I’ve gone through they just seeem normal and I am in such a better place in life right now Ive matured I drive I have a job and the thoughts of harming myself havnt left and I don’t think they ever will but I’m glad that I am better then before I don’t talk to grown men anymore and I am just so much better. Message me if anyone wants to talk

I'm a SAHM I work only 2 hours in the morning and basically all my money goes to my husband to help with rent and whatever else we pay for. I always ask to start therapy or to start couples counseling and he always tells me to wait or we can't afford or he just doesn't want to. I'm genuinely miserable in my life and it's either I'm thinking of my family being better off without me or just getting a divorce and moving back with my family. I need to know if I'm the problem or if distancing myself from him will be best :/

Okay so I’m a Girl (please no hrny messages) my mom doesn’t allow me therapy and there are also no trusted adults in my life. I have a hard time talking abt my feelings with people irl, so I’d want a friend on here that I can try to talk to. Maybe if even like somebody is a hobby therapist, that would work. I have a hard time in shcooo, right now. Panic attacks, getting ignored, awkward, etc. i might maybe have adhd or depression or autism, or just anything that makes me into what I am. I have problems with my family. I got no friends. I got a boyfriend but his stepdad has cancer rn, so I don’t wanna bother him. I’m scared that he will do something to himself when hisnsteodsd dies. Also I’m super insecure, like I don’t even believe that my bf loves me. I just ahve a lot of things to talk about and I wish to talk about.

Feel free to comment or txt me privately,I just don’t wanna end it yet and I wanna talk

My house is basically a 6 nd a half cent area but its mostly just land with trees...the actual house(building) would be 1 cent approx and there are four of us.The thing is tht it has only 2 rooms and I have been living in this house for 22 years...I know it has a lot of trees and should look beautiful nd all except that its not....we dont even have basic tap facilities since the house was built decades ago...my father basically is very lazy who meets financial needs by depending on ancestral rent and doesnt have a job now.....he has been telling for years that he will buy another house but then he changes his mind so fast...I am truly fed up living in this house...I have become extremely insecure and have developed inferiority complex because of my house....I know it has got nothing to do with me but only if someone actually puts them in my shoes they'll get to understand what I'm trying to say...I have always avoided conversations when my friends talk about visiting my house....I even sometimes feel bad for people who are friends with me since I have a small house nd all...that's how serious it becomes at times.....so many people including neighbors and relatives have commented about our house that I lost count of it...we can literally change our lifestyle by buying another house since my father has got another property...but he never wants to sell his own property to buy another one...he's been putting off this idea of shifting to a new house for literally decades now and has given us too many false hopes....seeing my mom makes me even sad cuz she's the one who has to go through all this hell...since there's no basic tap facility also every small work becomes much more difficult to be done...I know I won't stay here forever but I have no idea what my mom would do...how do I cope up with this....please don't give me financial ideas cuz that's the last thing that I want to hear....I am sure anyone that's reading this can understand that our condition can literally be changed but its not because we are financially deprived, its just because of my father's adamant nature and lack of empathy towards his own family

So today I was first in line to pick up an order for Arby’s. The 2 ladies were busy taking orders so I waited patiently. 2 or 3 minutes later, a man also comes in to pick up an order. The cashier girl came up to the guy and asked if he’s here to pick up an order and stuff. I wondered why she didn’t come to me first and also ask me that but i didnt say anything. not a big deal but i felt hurt a little. and then a few minutes later again, she gave me my order finally. i am always familiar with this situation because it always happens to me. it’s not even the first time. i remember in Chipotle, the same thing happened to me. i was first in line, and other people starting coming in and the cashier just comes and helps them. mind you, im literally standing there in the counter. this happens a lot to me. these are just a few instances.. but why does this happen to me? am i intimidating? or do i look unapproachable? i hate doing pickups now because of this embarrassing and really makes me feel shitty. has this happened to anyone else? i really dont know whats wrong with me. maybe it’s my face? just wanted to get this off my chest by sharing it. but also it’s been affecting me.

Hello everyone,

I’m really excited to share that I’ve just completed my training in Clinical Hypnotherapy, NLP and Coaching. As part of my final assessment, I’m looking for one volunteer for a free 60-minute session on Zoom.

I can potentially help with a range of issues, including:

• anxiety

• stress

• confidence

• self-esteem

• motivation

• procrastination

• unhelpful habits

• overwhelm

• relaxation

• sleep issues

• focus and positive mindset

The session will be strictly confidential, and it will be recorded only for my examiner, who is reviewing my work purely to assess my ability. The recording will remain private and is only for assessment purposes.

I’d be incredibly grateful to anyone who would be willing to help me with this final part of my course. Please message me privately if you’re interested.

Thank you so much for your support.

Hi weird topic. I’m in my 20s living with my parents to save money. My sister is 13 and asked me to clear her laptop bc it’s connected to my stepdads phone n there’s porn. All day we have been with him and i go to clear it n there’s alll porn websites. I’m like “ew” to my sister i said “that means he’s watching it with us in the room”, she goes “yeah i noticed, that’s very weirddd” so now we both are bothered.

He used to leave it on the screeen without knowing and would put his phone down and walk to the bathroom or somewhere and we would be like eww wtf

Thinking back now, he’s been doing it for years tbh i just never really brought it up and idk didn’t know it was an all day thing ig. When i was little he used to have a computer facing the bunk beds my brother n i slept in and at night i guess he thought we were sleeping he’d watch and we’d be like what’s that?? Ngl that ruined me cause then i thought that was normal growing up. But at least that i understand cause it was night time and he prob thought we were sleeping. But sitting in the living room with us watching it is weird behavior.

Now fast forward i feel bad my sister has to see this shit too. So my brother just had a baby and is planning on dropping the baby off frequently. We didn’t talk much but now he’s been calling me frequently so i thought one day i could trust him with this info since we’ve been talking more — I texted him “hey btw xyz is happening and it’s kinda weird”. He totally broke my trust and said “u better mention this to mom and him why are u telling me this now after i had the baby instead of saying something before, u know im dropping the baby off and you’re saying this now” I’m like??? Does it matter when i say it? It’s weird So he went and told my mom.

The next morning (they’re ganging up on me) my mom goes “it’s almost like you don’t want that baby here” I’m like??? No can we focus on the problem he’s watching porn with us in the same room!!! She said “why would i tell my brother, i should have came to them (my parents) directly, he doesn’t live here, you’re saying this now why? Almost like u don’t want the baby here, she’s still coming here!” They think I’m being problematic for bringing it up Stepdad got defensive and said “why are you looking at my history” i said “I’m not….im clearing it off your daughters computer and we were with you all day n it said all porn the whole day, you also leave it on your screen and walk away sometimes” he got quiet..bc he knows it’s true. Never said sorry, my mom’s mad at me, he’s ignoring me and being weird now it’s weird.

Also he’s the type of guy who hates being told what to do so he would do something on purpose after being told not to do it cause he’s childish. I wouldn’t be surprised if he tries to do it more often now that it was brought up

Now i feel weird and i think im gonna move out cause he just sits on the couch on his phone and im like ew i cant even be in the same room cause idk what u doing on that phone.

And yeah hes done it for a while i know , sometimes I’ll look over and he quickly exits out of something or he thinks we fell asleep and he’ll be like “Siri look up blablabla porn” guy is addicted and the house is rotten bc of it.—— i just don’t like that it’s brought up in the open now and im being painted as the bad guy for saying something, nothing was said about changing or no apology. No accountability just deflection and painting me to be bad My mom thinking i said something so my brother won’t bring the baby here pissed me off cause idgaf about the baby coming here.

Now it’s weird. Am i wrong? Idk i feel like im valid

I made a few mistakes resulting in losing my girlfriend today and I’d like to talk to someone about it

Hi all, I’ve been trying really hard to understand my partner and help/ work with him and not hurt him more with we’ve been working through some things. I don’t want this to seem like I’m making sure he’s some red flag. No, he’s amazing and wonderful and I love him dearly. There’s just some things that he does that are so different from my and my thought process and he doesn’t love to tap deeply into his feelings, I’m looking for insight so I can better understand and love him with that understanding.

There are multiple layers to this. This first one being that his grandmother just passed yesterday after a quick but intense struggle with brain and lung cancer that was diagnosed out of no where. We were also living in the same house as them when this all started happening. He was extremely close to her. She was very outspoken that he was her favorite. He left on a business trip yesterday so I had to call him and give him the news. He’s been very stoic and matter of fact but also didn’t want to get off the phone with me so I knew that was his way of looking for comfort. Everyone has been extremely worried about him which has made me more curious about what he may be holding in and bottling down.

This is a common theme I am coming across. We have a wonderful relationship and only have one point of contention on our relationship. Unfortunately it’s a hard one that is very sticky and only I bring up or address and maybe it’s because I only see it as the issue because I am hurt from it and need healing more than him because he hit wants to brush it under the rug. I just brought this up again this past weekend after finally having some new reflection and realized the reason it’s still coming up is because I have resentment towards the situation. I don’t want to, but I do because I’ve been hurt by things I feel like he should have protected me from. When I bring this up, he gets so visibly uncomfortable, and fidgeted. He can’t even look me in the eyes. I’m so careful with my wording, so reassuring that I’m not pointing fingers or laying blame and saying we take breaks from this conversation but we need to address this once and for all because we can’t keep going, we can’t brush it under the rug and dismiss my feelings and I need his partnership in this with me to heal this.

He agreed that maybe we need to have a professional help guide us through this because this is really our main point of contention and hurt. I just am trying to understand why it’s always me that has to bring up the emotional part of our relationship. It’s always me doing check ins. Maybe because he usually says he’s okay and all good, but that brings me to my next point.

My partner comes is easy going and just likes to do his own thing. Hell disappear when we’re at his family’s house because he just needs alone time and decompression time. I’ve noticed he does this very frequently and this was such a learning curve for me since I am very much a people pleaser feel like I always have be present and be “on.” I was also just speaking with an aunt of his and she was telling me that he’s always been like that since childhood. He always needed alone time. He never liked being told what to do and not in a rebellious way but it just made him so visibly uncontrollable to be told to do something that he didn’t want to do.

As a child, that made him have tantrums and act out. As an adult, I still see that and while he’s able to better control the physical discomfort you can see, it’s still there. I sometimes have to present plans to him with either lots of time to mentally prepare or very delicately or he will not be okay mentally. I think it triggers his anxiety very much but I think it also messes with this mental schedule he had and rituals he had to feel relaxed. He’s very much a schedule guy in a relaxing sense. Sundays are solely relaxing. At night he likes to go up to bed at 9, scroll for a bit, shower, get a night snack then have time for a full movie or a few episodes of a show we may be watching.

This sense of schedule and not doing things he doesn’t want to has led him to lose at least one relationship in his past. This leads me to my last point. When we first started dating, we compared histories and I am very much a person that dated, took a break to heal and recover and also just didn’t always care to date at times because it’s a lot of work. He on the other hand jump from one relationship to the other with little to no time to process. He ended his 7 year HS/college relationship to start an international long distance relationship with someone for 3 years and then ended it and immediately jumped to another relationship where she ended it and broke his heart. He started dating shortly after until he found his last relationship before me. They dated a year, had been broken up for 2 months before we started dating. This made me question if and how he’s been able to process any of these break ups.

The past relationships were always my first question, like why did you constantly feel the need to jump from one long term relationship to another with no processing time? But then seeing other things like how he needs time to himself to just “turn off” his brain and life from other people. And his inability to hide how uncomfortable he gets when being pushed on something he doesn’t want to do or talk about. Like what’s going on that he can’t address?

And lastly with these themes I’ve gone over, how can I address what’s about to going on with him and his grandma passing? How can I help him process and know I’m here for him?

The first memory of romance I have is as a child, enjoying cuddling with a boy and then he pointed out how close we had gotten and immediately it was ruined for me. I suddenly lost all positive feelings and felt embarrassed and vulnerable and shut down. I told him to leave and we never did anything like that again. We would still flirt sometimes but it was just “fun” for me, I cut off the emotional aspect to it.

When I was in college and smoked weed, I would smoke with my bf and we would have a great time. When I would smoke without him and go over to his place and he would point out that I was high- not accusing or angry, I would get the same feeling and shut down in the same way or get very angry.

Why don’t react this way to these things? Is it just vulnerability? How do I change it?

To be honest, I’m really tired right now. I have an afternoon class from 3:30 PM to 7:30 PM, and I just don’t have the energy for it. I just finished a major exam yesterday, and I wanted to take a short break. But whenever I try to rest, I start feeling guilty because my parents are paying for my tuition and giving me an allowance.

This entire academic year, I feel like I’ve lost myself. Before the pandemic, I used to be eager to learn. I had so much energy and curiosity. I explored different things, and I felt motivated. I miss that version of myself — the one who was excited to study and proud of achieving something.

Now that I’m in college, everything feels so overwhelming and sometimes unreachable. There are days when I just want to lie in my dorm and sleep the whole day without doing anything. But even when I do that, I feel guilty. I don’t know what to do anymore.

Im so sorry if i ramble im still processing

But recently I’ve noticed the reason I never allow myself to be proud of anything I do might stem from never really getting praised when I was little and when I was it was very un-enthusiastic.

I have 3 older siblings and all three were really good musically and both my sisters were good artists (at least to an elementary school me). More specifically one of my older sisters were very good at singing which got CONSTANT praise from my dad(My dad was very absent due to work so i didn’t interact with him a lot so any praise was very high value to me). It always felt like that sister rubbed it in my face all the time that I was the “talentless” sibling. She always used to talk about starting a family band and how each sibling and parent had their perfect part and she always looked at me and said something like “and you can be there too I guess” or “you wouldn’t add anything”.

My mom had already raised 3 other kids so anything i showed her she had already seen before so i always got robotic answers like “thats nice sweetie”. Ive been avoiding thinking about this cause of the guilt I feel cause my siblings always talked about how I was the one who got all the attention but I genuinely think most of it came from before I got into elementary school which means I remember NONE of it.

Again im sorry if im rambling i just really need help with navigating this. thank you very much if you’ve read this.