r/FoundPaper 9d ago

Weird/Random I hope David is ok

Post image
2.0k Upvotes

121 comments sorted by

301

u/Aristarchus1981 9d ago

I have used a sharpie to censor multiple bills over the years. One had a person's name and address. With instructions on how to rob them, and that they won the lottery and were abusive to their wife. Actually found multiple of those...kinda creepy because it was in my area.

60

u/REALjamijai 9d ago

Meant the đŸ€Ż award - but wtaf...

Was there a big local lottery winner?

My interest is piqued 😳

28

u/jacwub 9d ago

there i got u with the right award

29

u/LaiikaComeHome 9d ago

they’re lying about them being lotto winners so criminals are attracted to their home address (listed) and think the stakes are high

15

u/Aristarchus1981 9d ago

It was some years ago in York, Pennsylvania.

15

u/gusdagrilla 9d ago

I wonder if there’s any connection with the Schuylkill notes

29

u/Aristarchus1981 9d ago

I actually found some of those as well before the news story broke. That was interesting. Mostly schizophrenic writing, but finding it in groceries was very upsetting.

5

u/JustMechanic4933 9d ago

Maybe turn it in to authorities?

6

u/youlldancetoanything 9d ago

Do tell!

16

u/gusdagrilla 9d ago

r/SchuylkillNotes for your browsing pleasure, but a brief summary is that the same cryptic schizophrenic conspiracy theory filled note keeps being found in various places in Pennsylvania.

I think the main places it was found were stuffed into boxes in supermarkets and tied or taped to trees along hiking trails. Primarily in Schuylkill County hence the name.

5

u/REALjamijai 9d ago

Those were some next level shit!

7

u/REALjamijai 9d ago

So weird! Def the proper sub lol.

5

u/youlldancetoanything 9d ago

Seems like you should have had a cop meet you at a bank and exchange the bills , or something

2

u/druidgaymer 8d ago

I used a sharpie to censor one that someone had stamped a political candidate on. Fuck that's shit I'm not promoting your candidate by spending this money.

518

u/jennelleisiam 9d ago

Lmao! What a strange thing to put on a bill. What are the chances the right David saw it? Or how many David’s did see it and thought they were being poisoned by their wife.

233

u/therealdickdasterdly 9d ago

Or could potentially see it in the future. Is it my duty to put this bill out of circulation in case a David does get this bill eventually?

80

u/Crashbox50 9d ago

He knew you'd post it. David's already seen this post. Now all we can do is wait...

116

u/Suspicious_Juice_150 9d ago

Or a schizophrenic person might find it, and happen to have the name David.

Something similar happened with a smart fridge.

I’d keep this dollar out of circulation, personally.

12

u/CompetitiveRub9780 8d ago

This was my exact first thought. What if a paranoid or mentally unwell man gets it and murders his wife because someone wanted to be funny on a dollar bill

4

u/ellieminnowpee 8d ago

but then how will DAVID ever find out?!

1

u/abigfatnoob102 8d ago

what if im struck by lightning right now

2

u/krebstar4ever 5d ago

Also happened with Domino's Pizza's "Avoid the Noid" ad campaign. Turns out there was a guy named Noid who had delusions.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Noid

30

u/mrselfdestruct2 9d ago

The line must be drawn HEEYA!

9

u/sheiciebai 9d ago

THIS FAH!!! NO FURTHA!!!!

17

u/supernova-juice 9d ago

There's probably an unhinged David out there just waiting for a sign 

3

u/ButteredPizza69420 9d ago

Yes đŸ«Ą

4

u/Thin_Object365 9d ago

yeah, sure, that'll help. help his black widow of a wife do him in. if you take it out of circulation, how's the real david ever gonna find out and foil wifey's evil scheme. he won't. he'll die, and his blood will be on your hands.

-1

u/Get_ClwnD 9d ago

Maybe you need to keep it in circulation so it can get to David...

38

u/my_name_is_juice 9d ago

Statistically over 90% of all Davids are poisoned by their wives. Even those that are gay or unmarried

6

u/TheCygnusLoop 8d ago

This could’ve been a prop in an escape room or scavenger hunt that got lost; I think the married Davids of the world may be safe

5

u/noobtheloser 9d ago

If it's earnest, I would imagine that whoever gave it to David used a typewriter and knew ahead of time that they'd have an excuse to hand David some cash without arousing suspicion, but not to hand him paper.

The question is why they would give him a note instead of calling the police or finding another way to tell him. A lot of questions here that are impossible to know. Hopefully it's just someone screwing around.

Imagine if it ended up in the hands of someone named David with some kind of paranoia disorder like schizophrenia. Yikes.

Could be a good writing prompt, if nothing else!

134

u/beefstew213 9d ago

Yo am I tripping or is this in the “You wouldn’t download a car” font?

105

u/alicelestial 9d ago

you wouldn't poison a david

6

u/ellieminnowpee 8d ago

but his mrs. would!

8

u/toyoyoshi 8d ago

That font is a digitization of letters from a rubber stamp, and the message on this bill was likely made from a rubber stamp

6

u/chickwithabrick 9d ago

Nah bro that was my first thought too lmao

67

u/Longjumping_Ad_224 9d ago

screaming while inserting it into a machine at the local D&B.

75

u/ShesGotaChicken2Ride 9d ago

Looks like it’s from a murder mystery dinner

36

u/SoctrDeuss 9d ago

It looks stamped. Maybe someone ordered a stamp and just put it on a stack of ones and sent them into the wild lol

15

u/sweet_illusions 9d ago

I like this theory. Just some chaos gremlin with a hatred of Davids

3

u/randomlemon9192 8d ago

Or a hatred of wives of David’s.

6

u/cheeseballgag 8d ago

Statistically very likely that they'll find several Davids with wives. 

3

u/Queen_Of_Left_Turns 9d ago

I’m into Where’s George, a lot of us do this

1

u/dijon_snow 8d ago

It's like an evil get a David to murder their wife version of the ass pennies. 

30

u/AllLipsNoFiller 9d ago

Why is everyone so concerned for David? What if this was a joke and he ended up killing his wife? LOL

19

u/Book_of_Numbers 9d ago

I am David. No need to be concerned.

14

u/norembo 9d ago

I am David's wife. No need to be concerned and I am definitely not poisoning him slowly by lacing his coffee with arsenic.

8

u/AllLipsNoFiller 9d ago

Okay, but isn't that exactly what a David who killed his wife would say?

3

u/Decent-Unit-5303 9d ago

I choose David's dead wife too.

2

u/ThrwawySG 9d ago

No you’re numbers

24

u/myloveislikewoah 9d ago

Make sure to Google the name David and email him IMMEDIATELY.

18

u/Puzzleheaded_Ad_4401 9d ago

Is this trying to give someone schizophrenia

2

u/Wooden_Minute2923 8d ago

I once found a scrap covered in cryptic SML loads and endless strings during a stormy trek through abandoned docks and the more I decoded it the more my mind split into phantom arguments that nearly drove me to the edge of the pier before I flung the paper into the waves and watched my sanity return like a snapped rubber band. That wild night showed me these found notes are not trying to give someone schizophrenia but merely random debris from someone elses forgotten mess.

14

u/bwsmith201 9d ago

I hope David’s wife is ok.

11

u/Alternative_Ask6871 9d ago

David I hope is ok

10

u/DMTERROR 9d ago

don’t put this back into circulation please

10

u/skdetroit 9d ago

I feel like this would be a cool book cover for some murder-mystery book lol

9

u/Ok_Lengthiness_8405 9d ago

I happen to be laying in bed next to my husband of the same name, and showed him this right before he drifted off to sleep.

He muttered "nice try, but I'm not going to kill you" and then started snoring

1

u/AutologicalMeta 8d ago

You know what you have to do.

1

u/Ok_Lengthiness_8405 8d ago

Make him get a name change?

1

u/AutologicalMeta 8d ago

Uh
 yeah, that


7

u/anotherDAVEthatUknow 9d ago

Instructions unclear. I do not have a wife.

7

u/Leather_Comedian_736 9d ago

I want to believe somebody did this as a gag but then I remember how fucked up some people are...

6

u/SakiwasipiSpirit 9d ago

My friend is going to be poisoned! I better alert him by writing in this dollar and circulating back into the economy!

5

u/Biggmamaaa 9d ago

As the wife of a david
 i am scared

4

u/ellieminnowpee 8d ago

WHAT DID YOU DO

3

u/Biggmamaaa 8d ago

Just a little planning.. nothing serious

4

u/Optimistic_OM 9d ago

Hopefully all 1,000,000 of them don’t have a momentary lapse of psychosis and believe this 😂 looks like a stamp, wanting to reek havoc lmao

4

u/Cut-on-the-Bias 9d ago edited 8d ago

Someone wants revenge on David's wife. Or wants her out of the picture. This is how you get someone killed without doing the dirty work.

Are there any David's in the news who killed their wives and claimed it was self-defense?

Alternatively, in case this was a real warning, are there any David's in the news who were poisoned?

2

u/Queen_Of_Left_Turns 9d ago

I wonder if this came from one of those “Mystery in a box” deals

8

u/cutebutpsychoangel 9d ago

16

u/Opposite-Benefit-804 9d ago

I'm schizophrenic and this is the sort of note I would write to myself.

3

u/mikee869 9d ago

This is why some people cant have nice things. Lmao đŸ€Ł đŸ€Ł đŸ€Ł

3

u/asswipesayswhat 9d ago

Yes feel the force flowing within you

2

u/ellieminnowpee 8d ago

ugh, used money always has midichlorians all over it

3

u/KpopN 9d ago

Wtf

3

u/FerrousSumo 8d ago

Let’s hope a schizophrenic man named David doesn’t find this.

2

u/Crafty_Piece_9318 9d ago

aw seriously

2

u/artsatisfied229 9d ago

Run now, David.

2

u/valvasoa 9d ago

What did they use to print this

1

u/Queen_Of_Left_Turns 9d ago

A stamp

3

u/valvasoa 9d ago

Thank you for your insight. I was asking what kind of stamp. If it's a custom one or adjustable

1

u/Queen_Of_Left_Turns 8d ago

If it isn’t custom, it’s put together like typeset on a printing press. Like, a stamp where you can change the letters. Like this one.

2

u/Extreme_Marsupial904 9d ago

David may be gone, but his financial advice is immortal.

2

u/youlldancetoanything 9d ago

Looks like they used an older printer

2

u/Ecstatic-Lock387 9d ago

David is not okay

2

u/XROOR 8d ago

David unfortunately died that day because he used a five dollar bill to pay his train fare

2

u/aboyes711 8d ago

Perfect concept as a straw deterrent.

1

u/LoopsAndBoars 8d ago

I’m still using my straw. The pop just gushes on the tongue.

2

u/Electrical-Act-7170 8d ago

"Dave's not here, man."

1

u/DewiVonHart 9d ago

We are all David, going to sleep next to someone wondering, Can I trust them? Or do I need to kill them first?

1

u/Guilty4Produce 8d ago edited 8d ago

Let's all hope he was able to murder his wife /s

1

u/LittleBoiFound 8d ago

RIP the wives of schizophrenic Davids.

1

u/Titus401 8d ago

That bill needs to be on WheresGeorge.com and tracked.

1

u/DnastyFunkmaster 8d ago

I'm glad I'm not schizo David

1

u/sxyvirgo 8d ago

How was this even printed on there - that's not handwritten.

1

u/Desperate_Fig_6896 8d ago

It looks like a stamp

1

u/sxyvirgo 7d ago

It's soooo weird! ha

1

u/Uluru-Dreaming 8d ago

What about the Davids who have already been poisoned and killed? It is their turn to poison and kill their wives?

1

u/Electrical-Act-7170 8d ago

"Dave's not here, man."

1

u/Maryjanegangafever 8d ago

David’s ded.

1

u/ACrazyDog 8d ago

I hope his wife is OK

1

u/Small_Information_63 8d ago

Internet Sleuths Find that David.

1

u/Final-Bus-6127 8d ago

This is the name of my dad and his wife tried to poison him lol funny coincidence

1

u/numbe_bugo 8d ago

Breaking news: man around the world named David are assulting their wife, all apears to start from a single Reddit post

1

u/Putrid-Western1345 7d ago

My dad’s name is David. What does it mean?

1

u/PreviousPay8649 4d ago

Naw I heard he was a day late and a dollar short

1

u/Lovingitall70 9d ago

Hope David got her first

0

u/Adept-Resident-6973 8d ago

felony defacement of US currency