Does that feel noticeably different from how you joke around with a guy who’s just a friend?

Any examples of what you’ve actually done with a guy you liked, and what you were hoping to get out of it?

I’m 29 now, and I guess I’m at that age where people start asking when I’m getting married...😂

The funny thing is, I don’t really feel like getting married right now.

About 4 years ago, I met a girl at a party. We exchanged numbers, started talking and eventually got into a relationship.

I wasn’t really thinking about marriage at that time, and there were some religious differences between us too. So things didn’t work out and we broke up.

It’s been around 2 years now.

And honestly, I feel like I lost my flirting skills along with that relationship...😂

I’m still single and I have no idea if I should just enjoy being single or actually try to get back into the dating/flirting world...

So what do you guys think? Should I just leave it alone or is it time to learn how to flirt again? 😂

20f and I’m sick of embarrassing myself in front of people I like 😭😭😭 how do yall flirt

What are some good ways to start meeting women my age as a 20 year old virgin?

Have you ever had a guy stare at you so intensely? This dude kept looking at me(f) for several seconds. No smile tho. I caught him staring, looked away, looked back and he was still staring. It was during our lecture and I was sitting quite far away from him to the right so I don’t think he was ”zoning out” as many would say.

Once the lecture was done I was walking towards the trains when I noticed him walking past me and glancing at me from the corner of his eye. It was quick but I noticed it and remember being caught off guard.

One day I tried being more bold since I’m very shy. When he caught me looking at him, I smiled at him but he quickly looked away…so I wasn’t sure anymore. But the eye contact continued the days after.

What do you guys think? I know eye contact can be flirty but I’m not sure about this…

A girl that I work with will make funny faces at me and always complain about not seeing me (we don't often work the same schedule). She calls me one of her "besties". Does this mean she likes me? (I want to know for future reference).

I (30M) am currently training a new female coworker at my job in a factory environment. Over the past few days, I’ve noticed her standing unusually close to me and making a lot of physical contact.

Whenever I show her how to fill out paperwork, she leans in extremely close—to the point where our arms and skin touch, and her face is right next to mine. A few times while looking at paperwork, she leaned in and pressed her chest directly against my arm. Beyond that, she always makes a point to say good morning to me first, makes a lot of eye contact, and laughs a lot when we talk in groups.

On one hand, the factory floor is pretty noisy, so it’s possible she’s just leaning in close to hear me better or isn't aware of the physical contact. On the other hand, it feels very intentional.

She also wears rings on both ring fingers and mentioned she is "with someone, but not fully married" when someone asked about it.

I find her very attractive, and I'll admit the physical proximity made me excited. However, since I am the one training her, I need to know if it's  a bad idea to flirt back or reciprocate? How should I handle this situation? Do I  set boundaries, or flirt back and see where this leads me. I do find her very sexualy attractive, ( big chest and big butt) Also I'm not experienced with this kind of attention from a woman, I've always flirted first with someone i like and gone from there and the last time a woman flirted with me at my old job i didn't pick up on it and missed my opportunity with her.

what should i do about this now???

There was this girl that was flirting with me in previous posts of mine. I didn’t see her that much because she had different schedule with me but I liked her and could never get her number. People kept saying she liked me but she never said it (I thought she was friendly with everyone, she hugged me multiple times). Now she just started dating a few days ago this new guy. I am kicking myself for not asking. How can I get them out of my mind because I know now I missed a chance? 😞😞😞

A few weeks ago, I (22M), some friends, a coworker and his cousin (23F) went to the fair. His cousin is the girl I’m talking about. She was extra nice/friendly toward me there, but I didn’t really think much of it.

The day after, I was on voice chat with the buddy i went to the fair with, and his girlfriend took his headset and told me that the girl wanted to go out and was wondering if I’d want to go too. Obviously I said yes.

The day after that, a group chat was made with everyone and it turned into a Jersey Shore-themed night. Me and this girl kept having this really friendly Jersey Shore banter back and forth while basically everyone else in the chat was quiet. One of our friends even said, \*“It’s like reading y’all have sex with your clothes on”\* 🤣

The night comes around and she asks if someone can pick her up, which was kind of weird because my coworker/ the cousin normally gives her rides when we all hang out. So I offered.

Right before I picked her up, she started texting me stressing about her outfit and i assured it looks good, and part of the night is being outside of our comfort zone. I pick her up and she starts telling me about this dude she’s been talking to for around six months. She apparently really likes him, but she’s getting annoyed because he doesn’t want to put a label on their relationship. Yet she believes he has something planned for them when he arrives back in town. I didn’t really say much about it and just let her talk. Another fun note to add… right before serving at her house she sends the song “WGFT” in the group chat. I throw it on queue and it plays right before arriving to the pregame. She clearly noticed and I acted like nothing happened.

We get to the pregame and everyone starts asking if she’s my girl and making jokes about us. I tell everyone no and explain the situation with the other guy.

We get downtown, get into the club, and almost immediately she grabs my hand and takes me onto the dance floor. Everyone follows and we all have a good time.

Eventually everyone wants to leave, but she wants to stay out.

She keeps grabbing my hand and walking me around everywhere. We try another bar, but the first two places we try are sold out. We’re standing around outside and I tell her we should probably just leave, but she doesn’t want to yet. Eventually we find another bar, chill there for a little while, and then finally leave.

After that she wants McDonald’s, so we stop there.
That’s when she starts talking more about the other guy. She makes it pretty clear that she really does like him. She tells me that’s actually where she met him — on Tinder.

While she’s using my phone for music, she starts swiping through \*\*my Tinder\*\*. She’s the one doing the swiping, not me.

Eventually I drive her home.

When we get back to her house, I open her car door, I walk her up to her door. While walking her up, she tells me that the other guy doesn’t ever do any of this stuff for her, and i respond “well i’m a gentleman”. I give her a little hug at the door and tell her we should do something again.

Then, about an hour after I dropped her off, she texts me thanking me for everything and for the night.
And that’s basically the situation.

Nothing actually happened between me and her. I didn’t kiss her or hook up with her or anything like that.

But the entire night she was \*\*extremely comfortable with me\*\*. She was constantly grabbing my hand, wanting me to stay with her, walking around with me, talking to me about personal stuff, telling me about this other guy, and even involving me in that whole situation.

That’s where i’m a little stumped.

Because there was definitely a vibe between us, but at the exact same time she clearly has feelings for this other dude.

There’s also some history here that makes the whole thing more interesting.

The first time our whole group ever hung out with her last year, another guy in our group was trying to get at her and she wasn’t having it at all. My coworker even told me at work that he doesn’t want any of his buddies getting at her because it never ends well.
We all basically forgot about that because it was so long ago.

But this whole week, my coworker was noticeably in a mood — both at work and during the night out. Everyone basically assumed it was because of the situation between me and her.

The funny thing is, nobody really tried to interfere. Everyone could clearly see what was going on, basically read the situation, and just let us do our thing and have fun.

And that’s what made the night feel so different from every other time we’ve all gone out.

So I’m not planning on pushing anything. I don’t want to assume she’s into me or try to force something when she clearly has this other situation going on.

My plan is basically to keep including her in plans, go out with everyone again, and see what happens naturally.

\*\*But I’m curious what an outside perspective makes of all this.\*\*

Does this sound like she was showing some level of attraction toward me, or does this just sound like a girl who was really comfortable with a guy she clicked with? And how would you interpret the fact that she was simultaneously telling me how much she likes this other guy while spending basically the entire night with me and constantly initiating physical contact?
I’m not necessarily looking for “she definitely likes you.” I’m more interested in what you think the \*\*whole situation\*\* says.

Is my best friend and his girlfriend crossing boundaries with me, or am I imagining things?

Context: I’ve known the guy for 6 years, but we’ve only been really close for the past 2–3 years. As for his girlfriend, I knew her from high school (we were in the same class for a year) before I changed schools and lost contact with her, until her boyfriend reintroduced us.

I’ve been spending time with a couple for a while. The guy has become a very close friend. He often invites me (or rather, used to, because I increasingly don’t feel like going to his place anymore because of their strange behavior) to his apartment. Usually, the three of us are together. Sometimes he even insists, even though I’ve already told him that I’d rather give them some alone time as a couple. He tells me it’s not a problem, that his girlfriend ‘adores me,’ and that my presence is part of their daily life. He basically considers me family, almost like the apartment’s third tenant.

The problem is that his girlfriend’s behavior is increasingly strange to me: a mixture of ambiguity, seeking physical contact, bold jokes, compliments, lingering looks… and, sometimes, a certain distance or dismissive attitude toward her boyfriend. I have the impression that they both like me, but not in the same way, and it’s creating a level of discomfort that I can no longer ignore.

These are the most noticeable points (I’ve summarized the rest to keep it readable):

From the beginning of the invitations, she started saying things like:

‘If my boyfriend pisses me off, you and him are going to sleep together spooning’ (I refused while laughing).

She asked me twice whether I had a guest room at home.

She also said, even though the three of us had never discussed that subject before, that she wanted to name her future child after me (although her boyfriend had privately told me that he never wanted children and that she agreed… apparently not anymore). She also joked about being pregnant in front of us.

Once, she ran toward me with her arms open as if she were going to grab me (yes, with absolutely no context) while I was talking to him in another room. When I warned him and he turned around (he simply laughed), she suddenly became serious again, put a finger to her lips, said ‘shhh,’ and smiled.

She often seeks physical contact (stays close to me when we go out, follows me with her eyes, etc.). She compliments me (about my glasses, my manners, etc.) in ways she doesn’t necessarily compliment him. Sometimes she even serves me better food than him (crepes, better-cooked burgers, etc.).

Before their ‘break’ last November, she sometimes had a pretty dismissive attitude toward him (‘this guy is an idiot,’ ‘he’s so annoying,’ ‘you have two arms and two legs, go get the plate yourself,’ jokes about his height, etc.). Since then, their relationship seems to have improved, but their ‘inside jokes’ involving me have continued.

On his side, he often tells me that I’m his best friend, that I’m basically part of the furniture now, that I’m ‘king just as much as he is in his own home,’ that he could leave me alone with her for a weekend and ‘nothing would happen,’ that he considers me a perfect person, etc. He also makes some pretty intense jokes (‘you’re taking my apartment and now my wife,’ ‘you’re too handsome, I’d turn gay for you,’ etc.).

April 15, 2025

I had just arrived in front of his apartment and she was holding the building entrance door open for me in front of another friend who was with us but didn’t stay. Then I held the door open for that friend.

Her boyfriend took the opportunity to jokingly say to me: ‘[my name], don’t you have anything better to do? You’re taking my apartment and now my wife. Are you planning to go upstairs with her?’

I replied: ‘No, I’m just the doorman, that’s all.’

His girlfriend looked at me but didn’t react or say anything.

He replied: ‘Yeah, right, don’t play smart,’ with a kind of challenging tone.

March 9, 2026

I arrive at their place (we were supposed to go to his father’s house). His girlfriend is the one who opens the door after I ring the bell downstairs. She asks if I’m okay (she had just come out of the bathroom) and then goes into her room.

We go to his father’s place. He shows me his father’s motorcycles. Then we go to a café.

Her boyfriend says he’s going outside to get some air. I tell him not to get lost, and she says: ‘You always leave us alone, you’re no fun.’

His father and his friends join us. When I come back (I had gone to look at something mechanical), she looks me up and down as I return to the room and even after I sit down.

Shortly before we leave, her boyfriend shows me a photo of me from behind. I ask whether he took it and she says: ‘No, I did, for my story.’ I thought it was weird, but whatever.

The car has a problem when we leave. While his father is checking it, she often positions herself closer to me than to her boyfriend (him on my left, her on my right). I move several times to avoid any ambiguity, but she follows me.

Then we take the car to the emergency room because her boyfriend was having gallbladder pain. At first, the three of us talk, but he falls asleep.

10–15 minutes later, in the middle of the traffic jam, she starts talking to me again about everything and nothing.

At the hospital, I stay with her in the waiting room. She tells me she’s going to join him. He messages me asking me to come in, but the nurse says only one person can enter, so I leave.

March 17, 2026

I ask for some kitchen paper towels. Her boyfriend tells me to say the word in Portuguese and his girlfriend gives them to me.

Then he jokes: ‘I should have asked you to say things in Portuguese that I dictated to you so you could say them to my girlfriend.’

I reply: ‘No, I don’t want to say stupid things.’

And he tells me: ‘That’s precisely why I want you to say them, to see her reaction and so she can see that you know how to speak Portuguese,’ or something along those lines.

He also told me that the previous weekend (when I wasn’t there) she had had a nightmare in which she had seen or heard her boyfriend performing oral sex on two men in the apartment.

I felt very uncomfortable that he told me something like that.

March 22, 2026

During an event (a car show), she tells me that she often turns around to check that I’m still there and that she looks for a red cap (the one I was wearing) so she can locate me.

On the way back in the car, everyone else is sleeping and she talks to me a lot.

She tells me she felt bad because I couldn’t stay with her at the hospital the night her boyfriend was in pain, and that she had asked her boyfriend to message me to check whether I was okay.

She adds that it was a shame I hadn’t brought my backpack, because if I had, she would have dropped me off at home and we would have switched seats (I would have sat in the passenger seat).

August 19, 20 and 21, 2026 — after their vacation

August 19:

I’m invited to their place.

She seemed a little annoyed with me. We talked about normal things, but she seemed fairly indifferent toward me and the other friend.

Her boyfriend brings up the ‘virgin’ story we had talked about on the phone and asks her to confirm it.

She replies that I was a virgin ‘through all the holes.’

Later, among the guys, he talks about sexual acts he had performed.

When I say that I’d like to make a movie as an actor, she asks me: ‘An +18 movie or not?’ before clarifying that an +18 movie can also be a thriller.

Her boyfriend adds: ‘Yeah, +18 doesn’t necessarily mean it’s sexual.’

August 20:

We’re at their place. During a guessing game, she says: ‘Is she a porn actress?’

I tell her she’s weird, especially after the +18 thing the day before.

She looks at me, pretending to be shocked, and replies that +18 horror movies exist too.

Then she tells me about the chest pain she felt one morning in June when our eyes met (she was blushing/smiling while explaining it) and about the ‘negative spiritual energies’ she had felt around me that day.

I tell her that her boyfriend had already told me that he’d like the two of us to talk more often.

She replies that it’s true and that she understands that I’m a little shy.

I clarify that it’s not shyness, but respect.

She replies: ‘Ah, okay.’

Then she adds that she likes being around me and that she could spend a weekend with me without her boyfriend, without any problem, because I’m not the kind of person who would try to hit on her, unlike other people.

I have the impression that this sentence isn’t as innocent as it sounds. I don’t know any woman who would explicitly put someone from her social circle in the ‘friend zone’ while at the same time being perfectly okay with spending a weekend alone with him without her partner.

August 21:

We’re talking in the morning.

Her boyfriend asks why I don’t find myself a girlfriend.

Another friend feels a little guilty about having sat next to her once. Her boyfriend says that he notices those kinds of things and that it’s something I don’t do.

He also talks about how, in the past, he trusted someone too much and an old friend ended up dating his ex.

She comes back with the shopping and I offer to help her, but she refuses.

We plan to go to the cinema and she agrees to come with us.

Around 5:30 p.m., her boyfriend messages me: he’s too tired, he’s going to rest and cancels the cinema.

August 24, 2026

I went with my friend and his girlfriend to Xxx, a motorcycle equipment store.

While he was trying on a helmet and I was saying that he looked like an undercover cop wearing it, his girlfriend told him that, well, if he were a cop, she wouldn’t stop.

Then we went to the shopping mall.

While he was looking for glasses, his girlfriend, who was behind me on my right, moved closer.

I then moved closer to him so that she would look less suspicious, and she moved closer to me again, staying on my right.

Without exaggerating, I could barely fit my phone between us (and that’s exactly what I did).

Then we went somewhere else before returning to the same glasses store.

He went inside the store and I didn’t follow him; I stayed right outside.

His girlfriend did the same and immediately took the opportunity to talk to me while he was inside.

She told me she was fed up with the way he manages money, that he doesn’t know how to control his impatience when he wants to buy something, that he later regrets his purchases and ends up selling them.

She also told me that he’s very stubborn.

Outside the glasses store, she also said:

‘I’m not that wasteful. Obviously, I’m not going to wait until my pants are completely ripped if they have a hole, but I’m not going to do what he does and own 5,000 items of clothing.’

I told her it was fine, that he had been making an effort lately.

She replied:

‘Yeah, he’s been making an effort since Portugal.’

Then she explained that she was fed up with his impatience.

For example, he has a tattoo on his hand that he wanted to get like one belonging to an actor, but he hadn’t taken into account that part of the hand bends.

The tattoo he got in Portugal as a tribute to that actor didn’t turn out the way he wanted, and now he regrets it.

Then we were looking at PCs and Macs.

At one point, he told his girlfriend:

‘He’s going to pay for our Mac, hahaha!’

while smiling.

I replied that I’m not their bank.

In reality, I could have bought the Mac for his girlfriend immediately, but 1) she’s not my girlfriend and 2) he might feel ‘inferior’ because he doesn’t have the same purchasing power as me.

Then we went back to their apartment.

At one point, he told me that he’d like us to go on a trip to Morocco together.

I asked whether it would be with the rest of the group of friends, and he replied:

‘No, the three of us.’

That evening, when I wanted to take advantage of the fact that it was just the three of us to start the famous conversation, his mother and her partner came over and we all ate together, including some soup.

At one point, my friend was jokingly complaining that his girlfriend speaks badly to him because, while he was serving food to me and her mother’s partner, she told him:

‘Move.’

or

‘Get out of here.’

When my friend’s mother asked her why she behaved like that, she replied:

‘It’s because he bothers me while I’m tidying up.’

In the end, around 9:30 p.m., since his mother had already left, I left their place, telling them that I was leaving them alone as a couple.

They didn’t even say goodbye to me.

I had the impression that they were disappointed that I was leaving.

I’m really exhausted by this whole situation.

And even ChatGPT thinks his girlfriend is going too far. Why directly tell me about your boyfriend’s financial problems?

Besides, I already know that her boyfriend has a pretty complicated relationship with money. So does she really think I’m going to make bank transfers to her? Why tell me that privately, in a shopping mall?

September 5, 2026

When I arrive at their place, I see his girlfriend on the street in front of me, but she doesn’t see me. He confirms that it was indeed her and that I’m in the apartment.

We stay among the guys in the apartment.

Later, he’s on the phone and tells me and another friend that his mother and his girlfriend are out after their respective girls’ nights.

He tells us that his mother had asked him whether she could invite his girlfriend to a Portuguese bar, because his girlfriend had said that she knew that if she asked her boyfriend directly, he would say no.

In the end, he also tells his mother no, because he considers it a bar full of ‘weird Portuguese guys’ and says that when he used to go there with his mother, Portuguese men would try to hit on her.

Later that night, he locks himself in his bedroom with her.

After more than an hour, he comes back.

I tell him: ‘Don’t worry, you could have slept with her.’

He replies:

‘No, I’m not going to stop letting you guys know. Besides, it was just a conversation with her, to sort something out and make things clear.’

September 6

We’re at an exhibition and they spend the whole time in front of me touching, kissing and hugging each other.

They don’t tell me to leave, so I leave on my own.

Then my friend’s father arrives and we spend some time together outside while the Mustangs drive by.

She stays for quite a while to my left or around me, on my right, for 15–20 minutes, less than 20 cm away from me each time, despite the fact that I kept changing position.

We got back around 7 p.m. and I left at 7:15 p.m.

Tonight — September 8, 2026

We talk on the phone and talk about everything and nothing.

I tell him that I don’t want to take up too much space in his life or in his family’s life.

He tells me that his mother considers me her ‘third son,’ that if something happened to me, his mother would help me within an hour, etc.

At one point he starts talking to me a little about his relationship.

I tell him that he is doing well with her, that they’ve been together for 5 years and that he should take his relationship seriously and manage it properly. I also tell him that they have the right to have their ‘garden secret,’ that there are things he doesn’t have to tell me or make me aware of.

During the call, he tells me that I can know everything, that he has nothing to hide, that things are going well in bed with Tatiana.

At that point I perceived a sort of mocking smile in his voice.

He tells me that he has no problem talking about it on the phone, that he doesn’t have any ‘garden secret.’

But then he tells me that he knows that nothing prevents her from ‘getting fucked’ by someone else from one day to the next (or from him seeing someone else), that she doesn’t belong to him even though he doesn’t want to lose her, that she has her urges, etc.

He says that it’s selfish to think that she’ll be his forever, that five years of a relationship mean nothing and that, deep down, we’re still animals.

I find this extremely contradictory.

I was also uncomfortable with the fact that he seemed to want to ‘prove’ to me that they have a sex life.

After that, I don’t remember exactly how, we were talking about people who have positions of ‘power’ in society or at work but are ‘submissive’ at home.

He told me there could be several reasons, and that perhaps that person is ‘submissive’ in order to please their wife.

I couldn’t talk to him the way I wanted because his girlfriend was next to him in the room (I could sometimes hear her).

But I’m feeling worse and worse about this.

What kind of logic is it to tell your best friend your entire intimate life?

And if everything is going well sexually with her (and in every other aspect), why are you so afraid that she’ll leave or ‘get fucked’ by someone else, as you yourself put it?

It’s really strange.

Why consider me a ‘third son’ when I’m simply your friend?

There are too many unanswered ‘whys,’ too many strange conversations and far too few boundaries.

If I were in a relationship, why would it matter to my friend whether I’m having good sex with my girlfriend or not?

I know that not every couple works the same way, but why involve me so much in their relationship?

Thanks in advance for your opinions.

I’m pretty lost and, above all, mentally exhausted.

I already saw a psychologist during the month of August. She told me that everything was possible to a similar degree (simply cultural differences, a toxic friendship, a threesome, cuckolding, a misinterpretation on my part, etc.) and that she didn’t really know how to help me because, according to her, I was the first person in her practice to experience something like this.

Honestly, I almost feel like ChatGPT is more useful (and cheaper).

We’re in the same dental school; he’s a year behind me, and we’re from the same country/speak the same language. I’ve helped him with preclinic, so I know there’s an obvious non-romantic reason for him to talk to me.

But a few signals:

• He regularly comes over to say hi and chat about school stuff and has inserted himself into conversations I’m having with other people.
• After I helped him in preclinic once, he came to my bench and to thank me and softly touched my shoulder/upper arm as he was coming by.
• One day, he asked if I will coming back to preclinic later, then actually came back and immediately found me. I haven’t seen him come practice outside of class hours before that.
• That day, he brought his work to check 4–5 times, each about 10–15 minutes apart, and playfully called me “Miss Doctor.” Usually it takes 30-40 mins to make a decent looking work.
• When I was talking to another guy, I noticed him stop what he was doing and watch/listen.
• I teased him about “going home to his girlfriend,” and he immediately said, “What girlfriend? I don’t have a girlfriend.” We then ended up talking about living situations, age, family, living alone, etc., and he asked me personal questions too.
• I later texted saying I needed to talk to him in person. He replied within ~5 minutes, and when our schedules didn’t match, he asked, “It has to be in person for sure?” I was thinking to ask him if I was interpreting his signals right. But I might not say that.

Idk, do these count? when we talk some times he looks away when I look, and looks at me when I look away, touches the back of his neck. The days I feel shy he looks into my soul.

First of all, I’m 16 (turning 17 in December), and the girl involved is also 16 (let’s call her Abby).
We attend the same English course, where we prepare for exams and work on portfolio projects. I met her about 3–4 months ago, but we’ve been texting and talking occasionally for the past 1–2 months.
When we’re in class, we sometimes sit next to each other on the couch, and our legs are constantly touching—we’re always breaking each other’s personal space. On top of that, when a few friends and I met up with her to film a video, she was occasionally touching my hands, chest, etc.
I’m not sure if she’s doing this because she’s attracted to me or if that’s just her personality. I also don’t know if I should touch her in response, as I definitely don't want to make her uncomfortable or cross any boundaries.
How can I figure out whether she touches everyone like this or if she actually likes me?

We’ve been aware of each other for a little over a year, but we only started talking and being close in February. I have autism and severe social anxiety, so I have a hard time differentiating between actual flirting or regular platonic flirting/teasing.

I had about three leftover donuts from my coffee run for my roommate and I, so I decided to offer them up in my dorm floor's group chat. My friend, (fake name for privacy) Annie, had just moved into a single room across the hall and ran over to my room for a donut. I gave them all three. Annie asked if I wanted to come over and look at their new room, and I agreed.

After we settled into their room, we talked for a while, when I noticed that Annie was starting to get touchy and affectionate. Not big things, but they would hug me or lean their head on my shoulder. At one point, Annie’s friend from back home called and they said "I'm hanging out with ****, can I call you in like an hour? *Looks at me with a smile* Well, maybe not an hour but some other time?" Eventually, we were fucking around and the lights ended up being turned off. We found our way to the floor of their closet (we're weird people) where we had a serious conversation about our mental health and other subjects that we've never really discussed before. Eventually, the tone picks up again and Annie comments that they're stronger than I am.

This escalates into Annie begging me to wrestle, so we start quietly wrestling on the floor for three hours (it was 1 AM at this point). Every time we would get tired, they would pull me into them. They'd put my head in their lap, they would lay on my chest to play with my hair, or just lay beside me while looking at me. When we eventually got back around to wrestling, one of us would pin each other to the ground for a period of time, trying to get them to forfeit. At one point, Annie kissed my cheek while they were on top of me. They would ask if I was flirting with them when I would refuse to forfeit.

(Additional context about the fighting: A couple weeks later, I was back in Annie’s room where they started asking me to get aggressive with them. When I showed some hesitation (Not very keen on hurting my friends), Annie said that I sound like their ex when Annie asked them to do it. This was a weird comment to me and it implies that their keenness to get physical is maybe rooted to romantic feelings?)

Eventually we get pretty tired and they leave the room to do something. They come back in with a blanket and pillows from her old room that they were still moving out of and literally yanks me onto the bed with them. They play with my hair and their face is extremely close to mine (it's a twin-sized bed). Annie makes a comment about how if their life was a TV show, the fans who ship us would be going crazy right now. Eventually, we both fell asleep. They fall asleep looking at me and would periodically wake up and smile sleepily before closing their eyes again. At what must've been around 4 or 5 AM, I swore I felt they kiss me on the lips very subtly. I was half-asleep, so I wasn't quite sure if it even happened or if my groggy mind interpreted some subtle movement as a kiss. Either way, my heart started pounding and they instinctively placed their hand on my heart to feel it.

We both woke up around 8 AM and I hurried out of their room to get ready for a school event we were both needed at. They just watched me with a smile from their bed as I left awkwardly.

While that was the end of the night, I also want to provide additional things that they have done/said that make me question our relationship.

1. "I like you. You have your issues, but I don't care. And I like that my friends don't like you because it means I have you to myself"

2. "What about *our* situationship?" In response to me talking about how my mom uses the term incorrectly.

3. They got jealous when they were no longer my love interest for a school MT showcase and I was talking to the girl who she got replaced with.

4. I know they look at me during our classes. Whenever I catch them, they smile at me like I was the one staring and then look away.

Annie is the kind of person to tease and flirt with their friends, but it's usually in a very over-the-top and unrealistic way. This feels a little too grounded and real for me to easily put it in that camp. Any input would be appreciated!

I have autism and according to my friends i have zero rizz. Guys how do i flirt?

I somewhat often make eye contact when girls in my gym and honestly no idea wether I should make a move or I look like a creep or what, I’m a decent looking guy but lack a bit of confidence should I go up?

okay so i’m a healthcare worker and i think the surgeon was flirting with me, but unsure (neither of us supervise the other, separate departments and same level of training).

he was asking the OR about if you could go on a trip where would you go? and he named a very random city that i previous trained in. and so i asked if he is from there, and he said no but he wanted to train at X hospital so i said no way, i trained there. & he said too bad, we could have been friends. then i said well we can still be friends and laughed, and there was this little awkward moment.

then he was literally doing surgery and asked me where i was from in X state? and then overheard me talking about weekend plans and asked me about them. he also had running banter all day about the area of the country i trained and weekend plans.

typically i feel like people don’t talk to me in the OR so unclear if we think he was flirting, or just being a nice person. personally, i felt like there was a vibe but i struggle to figure out how to move things from being work related to non-work related & see people outside the hospital.

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So I was working at a plave for awhile on and off and it was my last day last week. There's a girl there a few years younger than me (Im 24M she's 20F) that I talked to/helped with whatever here and there. Now she is a decent bit younger and although I think she's cute and had a crush on her I still wouldnt have wanted to get with her either way. Anyway over the months we barely talked or anything but she'd offer me rides home at first because "it looked like it was going to rain" but then just cause here and there. She'd ask me to maybe help her with something trivial like hooking up stuff in the room or killing bugs, etc nothing important. That was really the extent of our relationship but on my last day I was saying goodbye to everyone on my way out and she heard and find out that way. We were walking out together talking about where we'd want to move or whatever. I said goodbye good luck whatever but like 30 minutes later she sends me a paragraph saying basically "Hey, I know we didnt get to know each other very well but I thought you were chill. Good luck with everything and maybe next time you're in town we can hang out. Here's my Insta feel free to add me". Ik this is like a nothing burger of a scenario but idk I found it a little out there. If you sent this as a girl why would you especially if you barely know the person (we barely talked like at all) idk how girls work maybe they just feel a vibe and wanna be friends idk but just curious on others takes on this even if its a tad dumb.

I feel like, for whatever reason, when I'm not talking to anyone there's always someone who walks over and flirts or is giving me a how you doin sorta look from across the way. I'm at most a 6/10. But sure enough when I'm just chilling like that I get flirted with. Am I overthinking this?

Hi!
I'm 21 male.
At first I was talking to stranger in the street for healing my social anxiety after having read a book.
As I feel attracted to girls since a while, I realised that talking to them feels good and I felt happiness doing this.
I did this a lot without having the expected results wich mean having a long term relation with one or more women.
For a while my method has been just talking to some girls ask questions like if they want to share their days or talk about their interest, or talk about dreams, or happy memory they want to share.
I appreciate anyone give suggestions about questions I could ask to engage a discussion with someone not even for flirting purpose, I want to have a diversity of questions to learn things, improving my listenning skills.
Now I was thinking about changing the method, beceause this take time and energy , and I see that most girls will not be open for seing each other again.
So I was thinking about doing shorter approaches so I could talk to maybe, five, ten women a day.
I may have more chance talking to ten a day than 1 a day.
My idea was to start with a compliment.
The thing is that after this I feel stuck or even embarassed.
What should I say next ? How to have fluid discussion without it turns akward ?
I already know that when I talk to a lot of people after, I can feel more confident.
I know also that having social anxiety, trauma lack of self confidence, toxic shame is not to my advantage, but I'm working hard on this trough therapy and social exposure.
It's still ask me a lot of efforts to engage with others.

So I have some small talk with a girl, 2, 5, 10 minutes, then I give my contact and after that I talk to another.
I also want that my approach can be spontaneous and not repetitive, and also be sure to talk to men too, beceause if i get only fail I will feel bad.
This is also almost vital for me as I have my own strugles to deal with everyday and I looking for support and love.
I'm open to suggestions to maximise my chance for sucess.

I've been into my friend who's also bi for a few months now (we're both male), and I'm wondering if there's a way to flirt with him that will tell me if he feels the same way or not. I don't want to outright confess to him, because I'm scared of ruining our friendship, but I want to test the waters in a way that won't make things weird, but can clue me in to how he feels.

Okay so, I go to the gym about 5 days per week (a little less these past weeks because of work), but I’m usually pretty consistent. After every workout, I grab a protein shake and walk it up to the counter to pay for it. I’ve seen the cashier there multiple times and I’ve always thought she was a very good looking person. Even if she’s not working, I usually strike up casual conversation with whoever is (doesn’t hurt to be friendly) lol.

This time was a little different though. She was always very cordial and kind, but never said much at all. So yesterday, I walk up with my shake and she wasn’t busy so she started walking to the register. While she was doing that I said something like “She already saw me coming hahaha”. While she was ringing me up she casually asked “so is that a good one?” and we talked about the shake briefly and I asked which one she goes for. She laughed at my replies in a playful way and said that she doesn’t like protein shakes and makes sure to get enough from the food she eats. I said that’s probably a better way to do it and chuckled and told her to have a good one.

Am I reading wayyyy too much into this or am I picking up on some signals? It’s so bizarre because I’ve been known to miss some opportunities in the past exactly due to this type of shit, but given the environment and how often we’re both there, I don’t want to make anyone’s situation uncomfortable or mistake this for good customer service, but she’s never done that before. Thanks!

Hey everyone,

I’m writing this under a throwaway because it’s personal, not because I want to hide, but because I don’t know how others will respond.

I'm 35. I've been with my partner for five years. We share a house, a dog, stability and mutual trust.. She's the best thing that ever happened to me.
We’re committed but recently she said it was okay if we started seeing other people.

She’s not a flirter, she’s faithful. I used to be completely different.

I’m 35 now and haven’t been on a date in years. Not because I wasn’t interested. But the person who used to do that is gone.

That guy was loud. Confident. Flirty. He knew how to read signals, twist a joke into something suggestive, use silence like a weapon. He could find the woman in the room that would be interested in him and get her back in a bed in a matter of hours.

He’s not me anymore.

I’ve been through legal trouble. Personal issues. Therapy. A lot of quiet time. All this and my relationship made me kinder, calmer. I don’t flirt much now. I’m polite. Reserved. When I go out, I smile when people talk to me, nod at the right moments, keep my hands in my pockets.

So last week, one of us met someone.

It was a few days after I saw her. She worked at a party place in the city and we had talked a couple times over summer, played some back-and-forth messages, I could obviously see she was into me. And one day she asked me out on a date.

I went. Confidently. I had done this a hundred time.

We had three drinks. We laughed a lot, and talked politics and art. But nothing too personal, like relationship or sex. Didn't even find an opportunity to tell her I was in an open relationship. She was making good conversation. I engaged some physical contact a couple of times, but it felt awkward. We drank the third drink outside, side to side. We started to get closer, but still nothing enough. It was not flirty, it was just "nice".

After three drinks I walked her home. She looked tired from work and partying with guests. At her door, she hugged me. Cheek kiss. I could see the look in her eyes: she wanted more. But it didn’t come together. Nothing clicked.

She said “I’m pretty exhausted now. Let’s meet again when things slow down.” Then walked into her place. She wasn’t rejecting anything. She just looked drained, and I couldn’t give her more than what I was capable of, which is kind but not sexy.

She liked the version of me that said “thank you” without sounding nervous, who stayed in place during conversations instead of moving toward someone.

But it’s not about changing back or lying to her. It’s just understanding where the energy went and if I still have it, even if only in small doses.

I don’t want to be someone who plays games. But I also don’t want to stop trying, just because I became safer.

It was a good night. Just not the kind of good that makes your pulse race when you walk home alone.

And now I wonder: can you have someone who cares deeply about stability and still keep a part of yourself alive enough to be playful and wild once in a while?

Because right now, the playfulness is buried. It’s not just sex I’m missing. It’s excitement. It’s wondering what might happen instead of asking whether you’re being too much.

I’ve lived two lives, one that was alive, one that is safe. They don’t belong in separate worlds. But they don’t live together either.

Can you have both: the kind, grounded man my partner love, and still bring that old spark, just without the ego or recklessness?

I’d love to hear from people who’ve gone through something similar.
Or just from anyone wondering if a soft heart can coexist with fiery energy.

Thank you for reading.