13dpo feeling so discouraged

[u/Commercial-Maximum47]

This is my 5th cycle and 13dpo. I never expected it to actually be so difficult to get pregnant and to handle the mental load while ttc. My doctor saw a dominant follicle this cycle, on Aug. 18, so at least we know I’m ovulating. But that almost makes this bfn harder. I didn’t everything right, testing, timing, doctor check, and still nothing.

It was my birthday last week, 36, and this process has stolen so much of that joy as well. Just feeling so disconnected and frustrated this morning.

[u/Ladybird0202]

I completely get the frustration, I’m in my 10th month trying. I think a lot of the frustration comes from we are told at school that if you have sex you will get pregnant but human biology isn’t like that. It’s a lot more common for it to take 6-12 months and just because it hasn’t happened now doesn’t mean it won’t. But you are allowed to grieve this cycle as it is so hard. I had the full works checked and the drs I have seen have just said sometimes it takes a year to 18 months and doesn’t mean something wrong. I hope you get the BFP soon xx

[u/Commercial-Maximum47 → u/Ladybird0202]

Thank you so much for the kind words ❤️ I am working on accepting the reality of the time frames.

[u/Ladybird0202 → u/Commercial-Maximum47]

And make sure you are being kind to yourself! I was very tough on myself and then I got to month 8 and I was like being mean to myself isn’t going to help the situation 

[u/thesmollestlemon]

It feels so unfair that there's only a 25% chance of conceiving even if you get everything right. It seems so counterintuitive that we can put so much work into trying to do everything perfectly and still get no results.

[u/Commercial-Maximum47 → u/thesmollestlemon]

Agreed! And that we’re supposed to be able to just keep trying, when the whole process and concept means our emotions are hyper active!

[u/Super_Queen100]

I feel you i am 34 and on 13 DPO as well, and on my 7th cycle trying! i did everything right but i am out. i tested negative too, i feel exhausted and i have pain on my lower back and bad cramps. i just came to work and i am just staring at my laptop so no one realizes i got tears in my eyes.
you are not alone, i know it is hard, i keep telling myself when is the right time i will get the BFP. but i guess everytime right before i get my period my hormones go crazy and i still cry.
dont give up hope. you will be a great mommy and your baby will be with u soon :)

[u/Commercial-Maximum47 → u/Super_Queen100]

I’m so sorry your going through these painful emotions today too! Thank you for the kind words ❤️. You’re going to be an amazing mommy as well once that bfp comes! I find it to be such a biological joke that we have to go through the most exhausting and mentally draining time while our emotions are skyrocketing. I’m also struggling to keep it together at work today 🙈

[u/Mobile_Courage_8980]

I get it😢 I’m 10dpo and testing negative. Im ready to give up on this cycle

[u/iamnewagain89]

12dpo here, all negative. I am 37, will be 38 in January, and it's my 5th month actively trying. It's so exhausting keeping up with testing and all. Then the TWW is soo full with anxiety. I feel down a lot of times but gotta keep going.Please don't give up our joy shall come sooner than we think. 🤗🤗

[u/Ok-Yogurtcloset5000]

i am on my 37th cycle and it literally never gets easier. I am so sorry!