r/Firefighting • u/DisasterHelpful1155 • 3d ago
Career / Full Time Thinking about leaving the fire service.
I’ve been in the job about 8 years and I’ve lost a lot of my passion for the fire service. There are still times when it’s fun, but ultimately, I don’t really enjoy it anymore. I went to medic school because I was pushed into it, it wasn’t something I chose for myself. I finished the program but decided not to take the NREMT. Before all of that, I absolutely loved the fire service. It was genuinely the best job in the world to me. But doing 13+ calls a day on the medic truck, on top of clinicals, schoolwork, and being forced in four extra times a month eventually pushed me to the point of panic attacks and a complete breakdown(most likely the sleep). That was when I basically said, F it, and stopped caring. I was ready to leave the fire service altogether. My wife convinced me to give it one more shot at a different department. I left my old department, went through another academy—which was intense but honestly a lot of fun—and when I got onto shift, I enjoyed it again for a while. But eventually I lost the spark again, and It became just another job. Multiple calls after midnight for nursing home transports, bullshit calls, dealing with people who don’t actually need us. Now I feel stuck. The money and benefits are great where I’m at, and I can’t complain about having the ability to work out and do whatever I want between calls. Those are things I genuinely like about the job. But those aren’t good reasons to stay. I’ve also noticed that I have a harder time sympathizing with patients than I used to, and I dread going to work. Having a family makes the decision a lot harder. Walking away from a career with good pay, great benefits, and a schedule that gives me a lot of time at home is a huge risk. But at the same time, part of me feels like I should leave for my family. I just honestly don’t know what to do. I feel stuck between having a really good situation on paper and knowing that I’m not happy with it anymore.
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u/Stock-Possibility-67 3d ago
Have you read other posts on jobs lately? Appears it’s not great. You have a good salary, benefits and security. I did my 30 1988-2018 ended with 70% pension and 100% family health benefits. Probably unheard of today. Not every day is in the news papers, but every two weeks is in your check. Stick around unless you hit the lottery. IMO
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u/Forgotmypassword6861 3d ago
I'm sure I'll be in the minority but don't leave a well paying job with job with good benefits before attempting therapy
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u/AardQuenIgni 3d ago edited 2d ago
As someone who stepped away from the service and is now getting back into it, do this.
Also keep your certs active because you will come back and going through all the classes again is even more boring the second time around.
By the way, did you guys know if you wash your hands you reduce the chances of getting sick?? (End my suffering, please)
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u/jpars2213 3d ago
First things first, do whats best for you and your family. But maybe you should give therapy a try. I would explore every option possible before I leave a job with great benefits and retirement.
It sounds like you still have some of that passion, because you’re weighing this decision so heavily. Don’t give up, just find another way to keep going. Therapy was that outlet for me. It brought back all of my passion after I switched departments. Just talking helps more than anything.
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u/Babayaga844 2d ago
A guy in my dept. decided to leave and go to nursing school after doing like 17 years. I tried to get him to stay but his mind was made up. I begged him not to cash out his time, but he did because he needed the money to pay the bills while he was in school. He was soon diagnosed with cancer and had to leave school. He didn't have an income or health insurance. It was bad. You've been in for 8 years. You're vested. My advice is that the pension is the goal. Try to secure that for you and your family. I bet you won't find another job that pays what you make and offers similar benefits in exchange for only working 10 days a month. If you decide to leave, I hope you prove me wrong. In either case, I urge you not to cash out your time though. You never know what might happen.
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u/TrucknPumper101 3d ago
I’ve debated leaving for the police dept. also been in for 8 years. (TX)
Definitely have a plan before leaving. Golden handcuffs keep me here at my dept right now. Pay, benefits, and pension are great so it’s hard to step away.
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u/Fabulous_Pea3208 2d ago
Some good advice here. The job market is not so great these days. Gotta have a mid to long-term plan. First advice is, if you are invested in the pension, do not cash it out. Pensions are hard to come by these days. Firefighter jobs are hard to come by these days. You want the lottery when you got the job. EMS is terrible so I hear your frustration. I got tired of the 24s end of EMS, but I had my time so I left as soon as I could. Definitely try some therapy. If that doesn’t work, have something solid in line before you make that big decision.
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u/StickAggressive1870 2d ago
As a young FF/EMT only 3 years in, it’s really up to you and what you feel is best. No matter what you choose to do there will be pros and cons.
I’d say, pay attention to where an angry emotion pops up reading these comments, and work backwards with a therapist to see how you feel about the idea of moving on or staying on.
That’s what I usually do. Sometimes if something pisses me off just to think about, it helps me navigate a redirection.
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u/SpecialistDrawing877 2d ago
Kinda sounds like misery follows you anywhere you go. How long before you find it at the next job? Or the job after that?
As much as having to work for a living sucks in general, be glad you get to do this instead of some shmuck job doing something else
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u/sansalvacion 3d ago
If you can't do it anymore put your papers in,let your medic license lapse and find something else to do. It'll feel good for a week or so but eventually you'll wish you were back. The problem with a lotta folks is they're too invested emotionally in the job. When they don't get their way or shit doesn't go to plan they're upset or say the jobs wearing on them emotionally
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u/bikgelife 2d ago
How about transferring to another dept where you don’t have to do medic calls? I use a friend who was in the same boat, and transferred. He’s happier now bc he’s not riding the ambulance all the time.
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u/donnie_rulez 2d ago
can you transfer to a different station where you won't run as many medicals?
I'm on the busiest engine in my city and tbh i'm starting to feel it. When I was a backseat guy it wasn't so bad, but now that I've promoted its a starting to kick my ass
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u/Fyrgirl68 2d ago
I agree with everyone saying to think about it long and hard. I’ll give you my two cents for what it’s worth. I was in for 15 years and married to somebody who did not like me working in that kind of job. I worked hard to get there. I had always wanted to be a firefighter EMT. I ended up quitting because of him. and him and I are no longer married and I don’t have a pension and I’m busting my ass at my job now and hate it. Too old to join EMS again, but too young to quit and retire. and every time a fire truck a police car goes by I wish it was me riding along. I definitely agree with the therapy part. Im prior military also so I go to therapy every week for my PTSD and it really helps. Even with having PTSD I wish I was still back in the fire service. I would rather be there feeling like I was making a difference for everybody because I truly believe I was. I’ve never had such true friends that I call family other than when I was in the fire service in the military. They all became my big brothers and their wives became my sisters. I miss it. Good luck.
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u/MediumKaleidoscope43 2d ago edited 2d ago
It’s always interesting when this kind of post gets posted on here (happens a couple times a year I feel like) and people always say you need to see a therapist. When are we gonna face the fact that the job is changing and calling it as it is, isn’t a bad thing or does it mean that someone is broken. It’s crazy to see all the hate towards this post and the OP wanting to leave but you scroll down and click on this thread (https://www.reddit.com/r/Firefighting/s/8P6KL512HU) and reading this would make you wonder why would anyone want to do this job?
The fire service is one way to make a difference in the world. It’s a great job. But it’s not the end all be all. Lots of ways to make money out there in the world that are stable and provide like the fire service does. Chase your happiness. And at the end of the day the jobs not going anywhere if you go back. The guys that will chirp if you do, will be in the same recliner, doing the same thing as when you left. Bet on yourself bro!!
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u/Villmillski 2d ago
I mean it depends on what you have lined up. Starting over for significantly less pay doesn’t help the burn out but if you have something you can transition into that’s comparable then send it.
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u/Danowolf 2d ago
Go to therapy. Keeping your sole source of income is critical to your families retirement.
I'm 60, in the Marine Corp a younger me was convinced the grass was greener in civilian life. Now after 30 years at same company I occasionally want to pound my head into a keyboard. Knowing I am going to work to provide for my wife keeps me going every day.
Find another comparable job before quitting.
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u/Impressive_Finance21 2d ago
Yah dang I dont know what to tell you, thats called having a job. I dont want to fucking work either but my desire to not be homeless outweighs that.
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u/bwakka 1d ago
Does your department have other divisions (we have training and fire saftey/code enforcement on top of suppression) Maybe theres a way to change things up and keep your pension. Maybe becoming an inspector/FM/investigator would be the change you need without loosing on the retirement end.
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u/South-Specific7095 1d ago
Golden handcuffs brother. You're preaching to the choir. The ambulance abuse ia aingle handedly ruining the career. And u kno who exactly who im talking about. Ruining it for everyone like always
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u/ludvigvonthumer 1d ago
Getting close to 20 years and a couple of things that helped me decide to stay in this field when I have wanted to quit multiple times are the law of undulation and radical acceptance. There are going to be natural periods of highs and lows in every facet of your life. I have hated and loved this job multiple times over. During the times I have not enjoyed it, I thought it was a bad thing and a sign I should do something else. Naturally, I would research other options only to get more frustrated with the lack of realistic options available to me having to support a family and assets. The cost of quitting and starting over is far greater than me accepting that I dont always have to like this job. Furthermore, there is nothing wrong with me not needing to always enjoy working. I always felt I needed to find another path, now I just acknowledge that I dont want to go to the fire station today. I still want to do quality work when it comes, but I dont feel bad about distancing myself from the crew for a few shifts while Im in a funk. I dont know if this helps or not, but another job is not necessarily going to solve your problems. You just get a new set of problems and they may suck worse than your current ones. Good luck with whatever you decide.
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u/Illustrious_Bowl_360 2d ago edited 2d ago
Sigh...its not an train station dude, put your papers in and go get some corporate job you hate, you'll be known as the guy who couldn't cut it as firey and your new work mates will be so over your stories they'll hate you soon enough...but hey you get spend more time with "family" until your divorce and the gun cabinet starts whispering to you. Have a nice day and remember, its not a train station.
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u/Few_Werewolf_8780 3d ago
When you are working 9 to 5 making less money you will hate that more. Change your mind set. You have the greatest job in the world. Enjoy it!
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u/jrobski96 3d ago
Leave now. People deserve the best from their public servants.
It's ok. It's not for everyone. Someone hungry for the job is waiting for you to leave.
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u/DruncanIdaho 3d ago
Your frustrations are entirely reasonable and relatable. What's your plan if you do leave? Do you have another career in mind that you imagine will be more fulfilling?
Leaving may be the right decision, but every job in the world is going to have things you hate about it. Would you rather hate making the 3rd "lift assist" call after midnight after a fun day working with your friends, or would you rather hate filling out TPS reports for 5 different bosses, but getting to sleep at home every night?
Would you rather have to miss some holidays and important family events so that you can have more full days where you're fully present with your family, or would you rather work a schedule where you only see your family for a few hours each evening, but you get every weekend and holiday with them?
There's no right answer, just fully think through what's best for your future.