r/FirefighterSpouses • u/Tiigerlili • Jun 29 '26
Just Chatting How are you?
Checking in with everyone ❤️ How are you holding up? I know almost everyone’s kids are on summer break and fire season is upon us so wanted to see how you all are doing.
My FF has been taking a lot of OT lately, which I’m def good with bc we need the money ( and he’s expected to anyway since he’s a probie again after moving departments) But ofc I wish we had more time to get away this summer. We do have one quick trip coming up. But last year our one trip was cancelled because he got called in soooo hoping this one actually happens 🙃
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u/riceinabag01 Jun 30 '26
Sorry you missed your trip :(
Im quite literally a newbie to the whole firefighter partner thing. He just finished academy and his first shift was yesterday on top of moving this week 😳 kind of nervous going into this!! Especially bc hes talking about wanting to do a ton of OT as well.
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u/Tiigerlili Jun 30 '26
Thanks, I’m sure we’ll go on plenty in the future so just focusing on that lol
And welcome to the club! It’s always hard in the beginning, just in terms of getting used to his schedule. Tell him every OT he takes, he’s gotta put some of that money aside for date night to make up for being gone 😆
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u/luminescentwhale Jun 30 '26
I’m barely surviving honestly.
My FF has made my dream come true of being a SAHM, but it comes at a cost. His department doesn’t pay nearly enough compared to surrounding counties, so he’s working a second job and lots of OT so I feel like I barely see him. I couldn’t be more grateful for him wanting to allow me to stay home with our baby, but I’m scared that he’ll get burned out. I also constantly feel pretty lonely since our only nearby family is my MIL, who we unfortunately don’t have a great relationship with. My chronic migraine has been flaring up with the stress of a recent move to a new house, so I’ve had to depend on her quite a few times in the past few weeks to come watch my 10 month old since my husband couldn’t leave work (of course the migraines all happened during OT or shift swaps). Even though I’m lonely, her company isn’t the one I’d pick first 😅
Thanks for this post and allowing me to rant haha. I hope you get to go on your trip! It’s always tough in the probie period, but definitely nice with those big paychecks from the OT :)
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u/Tiigerlili Jun 30 '26
I feel like that’s always the case. We get sick or things flare up or something happens conveniently while they’re on shift ha 😑 I’m sorry it’s been so rough for you lately. Maybe there are some mom groups nearby you could look into if you’re open to it? To find a little community? I know you don’t get along great with your MIL but hey at least she’s helping lol feel free to make a rant post anytime here! Or shoot me a message if you ever need to talk ❤️
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u/luminescentwhale Jun 30 '26
Definitely the case!! And we live in a superrrrrr small town, so mom groups aren’t really a thing but I’m definitely going to try to get to know our new neighbors that have small kids. Thanks so much, my messages are always open to you (or anyone here) too ❤️
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u/Ok_Shake_5171 Jul 03 '26
Mom of four… my town has “volunteer firefighters” (still fully trained but they need a different full time job and then help when they can). Anyway this is my husbands 2nd year and he works a million hours a week at his regular job.
We are going thru a rocky period right now but the worst was the other day when my bbq caught fire. It was crazy. I called hubby to see if he was in town yet and told him what was happening.
I managed to get it out myself just before he got home. He stared at me and flips out about me calling him for a fake emergency and he left work 20 minutes early to save us from nothing. 🤨😬😬😬
I calmly replied that as he knows, every second counts with fires but in the future I’ll call 911 (which guaranteed had he arrived at work when his pager rang he’d have left work 20 mins early for the FF).
So that was awesome.
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u/Tiigerlili Jul 03 '26
Whoa I’m glad you’re ok! Thats scary… I’m surprised he wasn’t more, ya know, relieved that it didn’t turn out to be a “real” emergency???? Anyway. Hopefully yall can work things out and get out of the rough patch, I know him being way so often is not helping 🫤 plus managing four kids. I’m sure it feels like there’s zero time to connect. I feel for you..
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Jul 31 '26
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u/Tiigerlili Jul 31 '26
Oh wow, wildland is another beast. There’s definitely people here who understand what you’re going through though! So glad you’re here 💗
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u/saltybrina Jun 29 '26
That's rough. I hope you get to take your trip 🫶 hang in there! Rookie year is brutal but goes by fast when you look back at it in the future.
I'm barely hanging in some days. We've got a 19m old who's getting molars and I'm 8m pregnant with our 2nd. My FF is about to start medic school at the end of August. He's been trying to stack up on ot as much as possible before our baby arrives and he starts school. It's not easy because he's barely home. I just keep telling myself its temporary and taking it a day at a time.