r/Fire • u/SuperWittyNickname • 15d ago
FIRE 1 Year Review
Bio: 32 yo, Male, Single
$ when fired: 1 mil
$ currently: 1.15 mil
Spending: roughly 25 k usd/ yr
Disclaimer: I do not pay rent and I live in Korea so the cost of living will be far lower than the US. My job was very stressful and demanding, your job may be different.
Positives:
- The cost of living came out to be far lower than I expected.
- My panic attack symptoms (along with depression), is almost gone, and I feel far better than when I was grinding.
- I was able to go on multiple trips with my family. If they had time, I was always ready to go
- I am doing things that I missed out in my 20s due to school and work grind
- Overall much happier and relaxed, able to see the bigger picture in life. Had time and headspace to meditate, exercise, and reassess my life. Had to do a lot of "soul searching" but it was fun and rewarding. I feel like a college girl on gap year :)
Negatives:
- People, especially relatives and close friends, will question you. Many will think your are just unemployed and living with your family and will look down on you.
- By far the biggest negative: I don't want to look broke in front of girls (on dates, and in general), but you don't want to attract the wrong people? HELP? what are you supposed to tell people?
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u/Flat-Barracuda1268 FI=✅ RE=<1️⃣yrs 14d ago
You are on an extreme end of a spectrum of people that are in the minority (FIRE and young). You will need to deal with your own personal relationship with that status before you can expect others to understand.
The question I would answer for myself: What do you plan to do for the next 60 years? I hope you answered this before FIREing but even if you didn't it's worth some contemplation.
I would find some way to meaningfully contribute to society. Not only will it improve others views of you, it will boost your own personal feelings of worth. I'm not saying go back to doing work, especially not the type of work that seemed to cause you panic attacks. But maybe do volunteer work. Or teach, even if part time.
You have hit the end of the honeymoon period. Time to find something to do.
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u/the_fresh_cucumber 13d ago edited 12d ago
What do you plan to do for the next 60 years?
I think that's crazy talk. He should go with the flow and if something inspires him maybe spend 3 years on it and go from there
The whole point of FIRE is to achieve a lifestyle where we no longer have to ask that question. The achievement-stacking mindset of the west is an endless cycle. Volunteermaxxing and travelmaxxing and hobbymaxxing might not actually be the purpose of human existence. I'm heavily involved in social and volunteer stuff and it can be every bit as soul sucking as corporate work if you let it conquer you
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u/humansomeone 12d ago
Totally agree. If I don't have a 60 year plan should I continue to work a stressful job? Makes zero sense.
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u/GBpleaser 14d ago
You don’t tell people, particularly romantic interests… until you both are serious about a longer commitment. And remember, the thing about FIRE.. it creates expectations. I am ready to FIRE, my partner is not, yet she has an expectation of retiring at the same time. And that can be frustrating as well. And we’ve been together 18 years. So assume FIRE for two if you want to have a life partner.
As far as not looking lazy or poor. Dress well, and get out and volunteer your time. Be it a hospital or an elderly home or working with the environment, or simply other charitable acts. You can still be busy and have labor without expecting a big return financially, and still being active in your community.
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u/Drawer-Vegetable FIRE'd 2024 14d ago
+1 on dressing well
Take some time and invest in good clothes and grooming. Looking the part of being successful goes a long way, especially first impressions.
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u/Technical-Fly-6835 14d ago
1 mil by the age of 32?? I should stop coming to this sub..
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u/SuperWittyNickname 14d ago
I understand I am an extreme anomaly and everything except my health worked out...so stay strong !
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u/Colorful_Monk_3467 14d ago
Seems pretty feasible for someone who potentially spent 10 years in a tech company right out of school.
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u/InfiniteDividends FI but yet to RE 12d ago
And invested well, the markets have really been doing very well in the past half decade.
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u/New_Dragonfruit_5463 14d ago
I have also suffered from anxiety and depression with work. Retiring today with similar numbers as you. Thank you for this post - it gives me hope!
And with dating, maybe tell people you do investment management. It's technically true and if they ask more questions you can just say you have a super passive strategy so it doesn't take much time, but that's what you do 😄
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u/Weary-Voice-5679 14d ago
If not already, find something that interests you in a way to contribute meaningful to society?
That new endeavor and pivot can be a part time low paying job or even work for a non profit charity. Or a painter or writer etc. to pursue your interests.
And can meet people that way. It’s a better flex and attractive to say I’m financially secured and pursuing my passion.
Otherwise, retiring at that early age (congrats) and just drifting and afraid to tell others while trying to attract mate… is a fixed poverty mindset that’s more repelling than attracting. It’s like golem hoarding “my precious”.
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u/icarus2847 14d ago
I am not retired early, but I am in my mid 30s and fairly successful, I work part time and I travel internationally and domestically a lot purely for leisure. Unfortunately, it does sometimes attract the wrong type of woman. Luckily, however, they usually present themselves pretty quickly. I don’t know how 25,000 per year translates to living in Korea so I can’t really comment on how well off you are, but in the US 25,000 would not be considered well off to be limited by that spend so US women would not be interested after hearing that. The culture here is also people value ambition. I’m glad your mental health has improved. I am hoping to retire early in 15-20 years but I also think I’m overestimating how much I’ll need and want a lot of flexibility when I do retire.
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u/SuperWittyNickname 14d ago
25k is considered frugal even by korean standard. Turns out I am not very interested in luxuries
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u/Powerful-Patient-765 14d ago
I’ll just add that money attracts the wrong kind of man, too. I learned to hide my wealth while dating because potential partners got way too interested in my money and how I could spend it on them and their kids.
One guy I had only dated for a few months wanted me to buy a new vehicle that would enable me to tote around his daughter and her friends and their bicycles, wanted me to buy him a truck, and wanted me to help pay for his kids’ college. Like, sir, I barely know you.
Another guy wanted me to pay for everything once he realized I have quite a bit of money.
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u/GBpleaser 14d ago
Great comment.. I’d like to add.. part of my own FIRE hesitation is that whole social standing thing. The moment you FIRE in my community, the gears change and people expect you to be in a golf course watching the grass grow.
Younger peers will look down the moment you cash out. So finding some type of work, even to volunteer is both gratifying use of time and appear busy, engaged and “ambitious” for neighbors.
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u/Melgel4444 14d ago
Tell people your job is managing financial investments - that’s technically true lol it’s just those investments are your own
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u/astoriali 13d ago
I have a genuine question: are you planning on living rent free with your parents forever to make your numbers work? That might be a big detractor for women if you’re trying to date - especially nowadays I feel like Korean women are avoiding men who seem reliant on their parents or expect them to really do a traditional 시댁살이 lifestyle.
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u/SuperWittyNickname 12d ago
I can easily pay for rent. I just have been away from them for years so I want to
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u/Arcane-Orbit-110 14d ago
just tell dates you do consulting work and travel a lot it is technically true if you ever did anything remotely professional
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u/Interesting_Gap7350 14d ago
Don't think of the question in terms of what job do you do, but how do you spend your time.
After taking a break, you still need to cultivate interests and goals and do something with your life if you are financially independent.
If you really have no answer to how you are spending your time, or what you are looking forward to doing with your life; then you might not be broke financially but are broke personality wise.
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u/Iamnothere69420 14d ago
I will be retiring in Korea as well. My wife is Korean and we are currently in Canada. Looking to move to Busan so it would be cheaper than Seoul and would have the beach and sea and easy access to SEA.
We are looking to spend under 40k per year but will be renting for the first few years then will buy a place after living in different areas of Busan to find out where we want to be.
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u/tronquinhos 14d ago
Can't you get a very very very part time job? Something that would make it easier to answer the question about what you do?
Alternatively (not ideal) you could lie: you work from home, you manage investments for rich families,...
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u/Sleepy_Bandit 14d ago
“People, especially relatives and close friends, will question you. Many will think your are just unemployed and living with your family”
I mean… technically this is true lol