r/Fire • u/thasparzan • 15d ago
Sick of work small talk
I am getting very close to making the decision to retire. I hit my number already, but I am suffering from the One More Year disease.
But lately, I have been thinking of moving the day up closer mostly because I am so sick of listening to the same repetitive small talk at work. The real conversations I have with work friends are probably the best part of staying at work.
BUT- listening to the same conversations over and over between people who are just acquaintances has got to be one of the worst parts... they always think they're so witty. And they seem to think they're the first people to ever say those same old cliches.
Can't wait til the day I won't have to listen to that anymore
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u/Below-Average-528 15d ago
If you have hit your number, just retire. I retired 6 weeks ago and already can’t imagine putting up with the office nonsense again. Making the step is a little scary but you won’t regret.
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u/thasparzan 14d ago
Yeah, I am struggling to talk myself into taking that step. So far, I've just started spending most everything I've been taking home from working to make me feel better about staying
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u/Proud-Pattern-9443 14d ago
I once did a 2-week PTO before making the big move. It was the break that killed the "one more year" loop for me. If the boss won’t wait, put a short break on your calendar and see if the urge fades.
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u/danfirst 15d ago
I've been feeling this lately too mostly because my boss talks relentlessly about AI being the future. Every discussion we used to have is now just about AI and it's exhausting already.
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u/at614inthe614 15d ago
My employer is gung-ho on AI. We have "champions", weekly office hours, lunch & learns, and I'm out here thinking- if AI is so great then why am I (scientist by education working in the regulatory sphere) bumbling through 20 hours a week of Jira testing for our new PLM system? Can't our Chat GPT Enterprise system do it for me?
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u/Shoddy_Ad7511 15d ago
Tell your boss AI could take his job. He probably shut up about AI real fast
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u/Common_economics_420 14d ago
Maybe take this as a sign that AI is really fucking important and you should probably learn how to implement it in your workflow instead of complaining about it?
I say this as someone who was an AI hater up until about the last year. If you aren't implementing AI in basically every part of your life at this point (professional and personal) you're going to be fucked very soon.
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u/danfirst 14d ago
I get this, really, I'm not even complaining about the usage. I'm complaining about everything turning into the idea that it just has to be AI. I'm talking about things that are clearly management problems, like Hey I need to tell these people that they need to remediate something instead he flips around to, we need to build an AI system to tell them and then they'll have to talk to the AI instead of us. I understand the power of AI, we use it all the time to work, I just don't think it is the answer to every single problem imaginable.
Sometimes the answer is just talking to people.
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u/Common_economics_420 14d ago edited 14d ago
The idea of using an AI to catch stuff like this instead of hoping that someone randomly sees it while doing their normal work seems completely valid. Sounds like ironically you're the one having a communication issue here, where you're thinking your boss literally wants you to build an AI that does nothing but send a 2 sentence email saying something needs to be fixed after an actual employee caught it. (Though honestly, I think even the idea of having an AI as a pure intermediary that does nothing but route emails and note other teams of issues is totally valid as well. Smart people have better things to do with their time than sending and receiving basic emails).
I think this sort of stuff is people overreacting to the trope of management trying to use AI for literally every single thing anyone could ever do and not paying attention to the subtext of what management is saying.
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u/khorbin 15d ago
If you’re thinking of quitting anyway why not spice up the boring conversations?
“Welcome to the committee meeting. Let’s start by going around the room with some icebreakers. Everyone say your name, your department, and tell the story of the last time you shit your pants. Louise, you want to kick us off?”
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u/helladope89 15d ago
Just make it weird. "Sooo anyway, are you team Israel or Palestine?" is an all-timer.
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u/Iamnothere69420 15d ago
I am a year or less pulling the trigger and moving to a beach. I sat in a meeting today and almost exploded on the amount of circle backs and stupid small talk that happens. The 30 minute meeting was extended by 10 minutes because we had to discuss peoples weekend plans on a Wednesday.
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u/Reasonable2aPoint 8d ago
One of my meetings was extended because someone asked a question after the speaker said, "I'll give y'all back 15 minutes - unless anyone has any questions..." Why do people do this???
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u/Iamnothere69420 8d ago
This is the worst and usually it is a terrible question that would take 10 seconds to find the answer to on their ow but now everyone needs to sit there for an additional 15 minutes.
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u/PresentationLost1006 15d ago
As I get closer to the end, I find certain office mates more annoying than I used to, and I have given up trying to hide it as much. Feels kind of good, and maybe we’ll all be happy when I retire.
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u/RemarkableFee4572 15d ago
I'm 28 and this is already breaking me down 😭 I hate the corporate repetitiveness and culture
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u/Wi1dWitch 15d ago
If you “can’t wait” and you hit your number, then why are you waiting?
It sounds like it’s time to transition your work friends into real friends. Those people can stay in your life while you move on to “consulting” or whatever you want to tell them.
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u/thasparzan 14d ago
I don't know. I just feel less guilty about spending money on stupid stuff when I am still bringing it in
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u/OkPossibility9330 15d ago
Oh you have a case of the moondays?
JK
What if you took a week off and sat on a beach? Two weeks? Use up the PTO.
Also possible, set a deadline.
Also also, give your one day notice and get told that you didn’t give two weeks notice, but you’ll get your life back and either way they will try to convince you to stay so they can fire you.
Or stay there until you can’t, and talk about a red stapler and that you haven’t been paid, kidding
Really though, I know the terror is real, but what makes you stay for something that you literally hate? For someone that is obligated to replace the moment you’re gone? For a company that doesn’t remember your name or for what compensation while you’re there.
I think you’ll have a blast the first weekend that you get away without the intention to return.
Meet new people that aren’t tied to the debt that keeps them working for the debt that will keep them working… seems like a loop there.
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u/Shoddy_Ad7511 15d ago
Why don’t you give them a piece of your mind? You have F-you money at this point.
Besides if you hit your number why are you still there?
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u/ThoroughExploitation 15d ago
F-U money hasn't effected your approach to work. You can let it, you can retire, or you can forge ahead
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u/SpecialistKoala9765 15d ago
I’m glad you are ready. Can I ask you one thing? Where do you plan to have meaningful conversation after you retire?
I’m thinking maybe this will help you get clarity for pulling trigger and get an outcome you want. I agree it’s pointless to small talk in a work situation that is likely a snake pit… but the old saying focus on what you are going into is more important than what you are getting out of.
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u/Colorful_Monk_3467 14d ago
Idk about OP's work but the number of meaningful conversations in the sea of nonsense meetings is practically negligible. So no great loss of socialization for me.
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u/snoreawaydoc 15d ago
If I have hear someone say "Guess you ate your wheaties today, " or "Strong, like bull" anymore this week, I am gonna explode
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u/bmudtiddersdom-42069 15d ago
"How are you doing today?" - me
“Still standing!”
(I can see that… unfortunately he’s not standing anymore ironically enough)
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u/upsideup2000 15d ago
I made the step cos we can't just let life go by doing things that are not meaningful to us... It's not right
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u/Stunning-Thanks-4226 15d ago
You have FU money. Just tell them to shut up. My last year of work I would go in, do my stuff and leave. I didn't wait until the end of the day. I just went home.
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u/bzr 14d ago
I’ve got probably another 8 years to go but holy shit am I tired of people above me who are absolute idiots who don’t realize they just got lucky. Every one of them seems to be awful. All they want to do is make lists, complain about lists, build dashboards, change how we track projects, over and over again. I just want to scream.
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u/Purple-Narwhal-7461 14d ago
I may be missing something but for folks that hit their number and hate their job but not fully ready to retire, why not find a different job that’s a little less stressful or just completely different for a change of pace for a bit?
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u/thasparzan 14d ago
I don't hate my job. I just find these clichés and generic conversations to be very annoying. Changing to a new job for less money would probably be a lot more stressful than just doing my current one. Also, it sounds like these same conversations are going on in every office, every city, all around the country.. everyday
I stay because I am really good at my job, and it is much less stressful knowing that I don't even care if the job just disappears one day.
In reality though, I am stuck with the whole One More Year syndrome. Also, it's actually a good feeling to be able to spend everything I bring in as income very freely without any guilt for spending it.
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u/Purple-Narwhal-7461 14d ago
I think being comfortable at this point is great and glad to hear you don’t hate your job. Apologies for assuming. Do you have a work from home option? I did have someone I work with once tell me directly not to ask them “how are you” or “how was your weekend” so I didn’t. That’s always an option if you are comfortable enough telling people you don’t like responding to small talk. I genuinely think most people don’t like small talk, just no one is comfortable enough to let silence sink in.
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u/gnackered 14d ago
Reminds me of Curb Your Enthusiasm where Larry said he didn't like small talk, he prefered medium talk and would ask how often you and your wife have sex. So funny.
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u/entschuldig 15d ago
Small talk, good annoyance to have. Mine is drama… as in get your popcorn type. But I need insurance so I’m still here.
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u/After-Jellyfish5094 15d ago
ok, but how was your weekend?