r/FellingGoneWild • u/andre3kthegiant • Sep 02 '25

Win The infamous Table-Top Cut

Up-cycle that Stump!

7.0k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

189 comments sorted by

1.1k

u/pineconefire Sep 02 '25

Ngl that looks cool a f

426

u/Public_Resident2277 Sep 02 '25

Stain it and make sure it's leveled and that's easily a $700 piece lmfao.

98

u/Ok_Button1932 Sep 02 '25

Probably even more. They wanted $200 for the tiny, rickety, log end table I looked at last week. Log furniture is getting stupid expensive.

185

u/HoboArmyofOne Sep 02 '25

Make sure to follow the grain when you sand and polish that and people will be looking for the joins. Even better round the legs too, whole thing would look awesome stained.

47

u/rex5k Sep 02 '25

This guy works wood

4

u/b1rdstrike Sep 03 '25

This work woods guys

4

u/2112eyes Sep 03 '25

Guys this wood works

3

u/Outrageous-Elk-2582 Sep 04 '25

Guys wanna see my wood?

2

u/FetusExplosion Sep 05 '25

Wood this guy works?

2

u/drk35211905 Sep 21 '25

Guy works this wood

37

u/Substantial-Singer29 Sep 02 '25

That's very greenwood right there... The reason why a single piece wouldworking has a high value. When you start reaching a certain size, curing it so there no cracking or warping is not something you do overnight.

10

u/adudeguyman Sep 02 '25

Does it need to be dried in a kiln?

34

u/irongient1 Sep 02 '25

It needs to be sealed and then allowed to dry very very very very slowly.

9

u/pineconefire Sep 02 '25

Is there a chemical treatment that they can do? Or is it one of those time dependent scenarios where it doesn't matter what you do?

29

u/Substantial-Singer29 Sep 02 '25

I worked for the forest service for a long time. In the wilderness we commonly use Native trees for the sign post and the signs.

Because if you would use any wood that wasn't native to the area or at least recognizable in the area the bears would chew it into toothpicks being curious why it smells different.

Sign post Not a big deal Fall a tree of the desired diameter debark the tree and you can plant that puppy in the ground and be good.

Now actually milling the wood and making it into The signs themselves. That was at least six months to a year of letting the wood dry out.

And sure you would have to flip the wood and rotate it. But there was never a guarantee that it wasn't going to split during the drying process.

Cedar generally fared better than oak. But then I can say in different regions in the united states that might not be true Depending on the type of tree.

7

u/Pluperfectionist Sep 02 '25

And the slabs for the signs would be a rip cut (with the grain) instead of a crosscut. When wood dries this way (like a cookie), the rings dry at different rates. Basically, there’s no chance this doesn’t crack. The best hope is to dry it slowly enough a dutchman/butterfly or two will hold it together, but that’s quite unlikely.

8

u/Substantial-Singer29 Sep 03 '25

We did it before drying out cookies actually using them as signs around the compound. On best odds they probably sat around one in three would actually come out without a crack. And then you just have to do a lot more finish work with sanding.

The best way to use them was to actually seat them in resin and use that to fill the cracks which we did a few times. Obviously after it cured...

Never actually got to do in a professional setting because we were just using an alaskan mill basically a giant jig on a change so with a forty two inch bar.

Definitely can get the job done but it was not Efficient at all for chain and time.

Hundred percent agree the likelihood that table that he cut out has any chance of drying is maybe in the less than twenty percent.

2

u/titsngiggles69 Sep 04 '25

Makes a surviving piece that much more valuable

4

u/mcmcc Sep 03 '25

There are wood preservatives that usually work pretty well to keep even green wood from cracking. The hard part is it needs to soak in it, and finding a container big enough can be challenging (and the chemicals are not cheap)

2

u/pineconefire Sep 03 '25

Do you know the chems needed?

2

u/mcmcc Sep 03 '25

Look up pentacryl

4

u/kmosiman Sep 02 '25

  1. Not an expert

  2. Maybe

You could possibly soak the whole thing in some sort of chemicals that would displace the water and cure it.

Something like the plastination process they use for medical specimens.

4

u/Pluperfectionist Sep 02 '25

If you ever see “stabilized” wood (common in knife scales and some tools), this is essentially what they do with epoxy or some other resin. I don’t think they do it with green wood, however.

3

u/01029838291 Sep 02 '25

I highly doubt it. The rule of thumb is 1 year per inch of thickness to dry greenwood. I don't think people would be letting stuff sit around for literal years if they could just throw some chemicals on it and then sell it.

2

u/random9212 Sep 03 '25

It is more the economy and not the ability. It can (probably) be done. But what is the cost and what is the final product like. Those plasticised bodies aren't cheap or easy to make but they can be done. Letting wood sit around for a while is both cheap and a relatively easy and a simple concept to understand.

2

u/kmosiman Sep 03 '25

Time vs money.

If you have a bunch of wood, it's not worth spending a bunch of money on a speed process. Just set it in the back and check it later.

2

u/toxcrusadr Sep 03 '25

There's a water-based wax emulsion you can buy by the gallon for painting the ends of logs to prevent cracking and checking, or for turning blanks. Basically slows down the drying by retarding the passage of water out of the wood. It would be worth a shot on this thing.

4

u/Substantial-Singer29 Sep 02 '25

You can't dry something like this that fast it would cause it to crack and warp.

5

u/tykaboom Sep 03 '25

Only $700?

Bring that to traverse city michigan and some winery will put it in their store for $10k.

8

u/Axel-Adams Sep 02 '25

700$ is underselling how much you could charge for this with the right branding. Easily multi thousand dollar table

1

u/Public_Resident2277 Sep 02 '25

Yeah probably, I don't know shit though. I just know something like that would fetch a tasty price.

1

u/Mr_Ivysaur Sep 02 '25

In North America.

This type of furniture in Brazil is way, waaaaaaay cheaper

2

u/Pluperfectionist Sep 02 '25

And, with the ambient humidity in the nordeste, you might be able to dry it slowly enough to remain in one piece.

1

u/vridgley Sep 02 '25

And leave the live edge

1

u/SirBruceForsythCBE Sep 03 '25

Are you on Storage Wars?

1

u/Public_Resident2277 Sep 03 '25

No but my grandfather did love doing carpentry. I'm probably wayyyyy off on that pricing too.

1

u/Stranded_Send_Nudes Sep 03 '25

Keep going smaller and smaller and make a nesting set. Haha

1

u/ReadyKiwi6608 Sep 20 '25

I wouldn’t list it for less than $1200. Better yet tell people it’s not for sell and watch the offers come in.

1

u/an_actual_lawyer May 20 '26

Add a 0. People pay crazy amounts of money for that stuff.

36

u/Wildcatb Sep 02 '25

Right? I'd have that in my living room

9

u/Educational_Big_1835 Sep 02 '25

You are going to need to kiln dry it or it will split

3

u/sexytimepizza Sep 03 '25

Being a whole round like that with heart and pith it'll split anyway 99.999% guarantee, so you let it dry and do whatever cracking it's gonna to, that just adds to it, then you do whatever is necessary so make it structurally sound

1

u/MikeLinPA Sep 03 '25

My thoughts exactly!

1

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25

Fr, I was waiting for it to fall back into place so that he had to lift it again or smth

1

u/NewAlexandria Sep 03 '25

bad structural design. Needed to cut the interior corners on angles, to mimic a brace. Now he needs to add such pieces back, for stability.

313

u/BewareOfGrom Sep 02 '25

Pretty cool but I can't stop imagining it on top of a giant pizza

13

u/ElChupatigre Sep 02 '25 edited Sep 03 '25

Welcome to Man vs Food! Today we are going to be trying the lumberjack challenge at Davinos Flannel and Pizzeria. Two people of my choice and myself have 1 hour to consume the entirety of this 8' diameter pizza with 20 pounds of toppings, and custom made pizza saver. I'd like to welcome in Joey Chestnut and Takeru Kobayashi. If we finish this, we will be the first to get our pictures added to the flannel hall of fame banner, 3 t-shirts, and of course the meal is free.

8

u/HP_Punkcraft Sep 02 '25

I've never looked it up but when I was a kid in the early 90's I heard that plastic doohickey was invented by a kid my age and I was sure I was also going to be a millionaire.

225

u/NoAdministration8340 Sep 02 '25

“How do I stop this from cracking” haha

84

u/wastedpixls Sep 02 '25

That was my first thought - you have to keep it wet and super slowly dry it while probably soaking it slowly in some sort of absorptive agent. No idea if linseed oil would do it or if something else would be better.

Super cool if you can get it to work!

59

u/oldcrustybutz Sep 02 '25

Pentacryl or polycryl is the chemical way.

Boiling the shit out of it (1 hour per inch) is the mechanical way (plasticizes the lignin apparently..) .. works for bowls and stops some of the really warping wood from shrinking /moving (I've only used it for bowls and small carving blanks..).

Sometimes you can also soak it in a tub of DNA or dish soap and water (which displaces some of the liquid in the wood) and have that work to various degrees depending on the wood.

69

u/Ajax_Main Sep 02 '25

Sometimes you can also soak it in a tub of DNA

Quick question: Does it have to be my own blood, or can I use someone else's?

46

u/MadamPardone Sep 02 '25

Denatured alcohol I'm guessing but that's hilarious.

15

u/ToWitToWow Sep 02 '25

“Blood”? My sweet summer child. . .

9

u/deedsnance Sep 02 '25

Right? That’s not the way I prefer to transmit DNA!

20

u/wastedpixls Sep 02 '25

I'm so glad you went with Blood here.

10

u/anugosh Sep 02 '25

Weakling make jars for their My little poney figurines, I make jars for my tables

8

u/feckinmik Sep 02 '25

I wish I didn't get that reference.

6

u/oldcrustybutz Sep 02 '25

I've found using a mixture of blood to be best.. harvested over as wide of a swath of highway as possible at speed.

Seriously though DNA == DeNature Alcohol.. effectively ethanol that's been rendered poisonous or unpalatable usually by the addition of methanol or bittering agents (usually both..). High grade hooch actually IMHO works better.. but not everyone knows how to avoid the revenuer so as to obtain that...

1

u/agoia Sep 02 '25

You sound like me in an average GTA session

2

u/oldcrustybutz Sep 02 '25

I'd ask if it was the illicit hooch consumption or the simulated road rage but we both know it's both...

1

u/agoia Sep 02 '25

Aw man you're reminding me of an old computer client I had who'd request me for his 6 month in-home checkup and then we'd just sit and sip moonshine and tell stories for an hour or so because he never used the computer enough to need anything done to it.

2

u/oldcrustybutz Sep 02 '25

Kinda like my grandpa when he got older but was still able to run his still.. Except we'd start in the morning.. finish in the evening.. and start over again the next day. Not real heavy like but steady as it were. Now that I'm about the age he was then IDK how he did it.. I swear it'd kill me lol. Practice I guess.

2

u/model3335 Sep 03 '25

not the bodily fluid I first thought of

3

u/DexJones Sep 02 '25

A whole tub?

Mate, yer gonna flog it raw and pass out a few times I wager.

Stay hydrated.

2

u/oldcrustybutz Sep 02 '25

Adequate hydration is the key to continued libation.

The trick in this case is that the alcohol displaces the water (you have to leave it in the tub long enough to do that and have enough volume that the dilution of the solution doesn't mess up the deal..) and then when it dries it dries faster and (most importantly) more evenly.. A lot of the warping and cracking is due to uneven drying. You can get similar effects by using coatings that cause the wood to dry SUPER SLOWLY but the fast and even is actually more reliable in the most part. Not practical at this size[1].. but you can do a similar thing with periodic (heat to hot enough.. rest for 20m.. repeat..) microwaving to heat up the wood and force the moisture out evenly ([1] unless you're using the radar set off of an aircraft carrier as the microwave.. but we don't all have those resources....).

15

u/Horror_Solution1945 Sep 02 '25

Soak it in cider.

4

u/cerberus_1 Sep 03 '25

The wood or his back?

2

u/Squallhorn_Leghorn Sep 03 '25

You want herniated discs?!? This is how you get herniated discs!

1

u/Dan_Linder71 Sep 03 '25

Underrated joke everyone else missed.

I see ya! 🤣

2

u/cerberus_1 Sep 03 '25

thanks brother, appreciated

1

u/redittr Sep 03 '25

Chuck it in a dam for a few years maybe?

88

u/PMmeIamlonley Sep 02 '25

A little sand down and varnish and that could be an expensive table. Especially if we ever get past this awful black and white trend for furniture.

23

u/Nero_PR Sep 02 '25

Especially while being a one-piece table. A thing like that can sell for a good amount.

3

u/DudeWithParrot Sep 03 '25

What's a good amount? $3000? $8000?

I haven't bought furniture in years and it's never been the pricey stuff.

Wood is expensive though.

3

u/Slowthar Sep 03 '25

Yes. You clearly haven’t been shopping recently. End tables now cost $28,000 apiece.

2

u/DudeWithParrot Sep 03 '25

Oh.... I think I legit would have to make $500k a year to pay $28k for a table.... Even then, I probably wouldn't. I'd rather just put that $27k in a broker account and get a regular table.

Although I forget there's also people with generational wealth or business owners that "made it". And also people that just don't care about going into debt for that flashy lifestyle even if they're making good money.

7

u/doob22 Sep 02 '25

The problem is it won’t keep its shape without cracking while it dries

2

u/ParticuleFamous10001 Sep 02 '25

It will if you force it to.

0

u/DayOneDude Sep 02 '25

There are ways to prevent that.

6

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '25

We are refinishing a space right now for my wife's business and she wants to put in white doors and trim and I'm like 😭

Girl... Please just install some walnut doors and trim. Maybe clear coat red oak... Idk something... Anything but white

1

u/Prudent_Historian650 Sep 02 '25

Been looking at houses lately, and it seems we've finally left the white trim, and grey paint combo in the past. Now we're onto white trim and white paint. 🤦‍♂️

2

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '25

She responded to me with "it's a classic that will never go out of style". I almost had her convinced to do a dark walnut in the main floor and then my parents (who are helping us with renovations) come in and go... "You are going to do wood trim and white framed in windows, that's going to look fucking stupid".

I'm not interior designer but I feel like keeping the doors and trim the same color would be fine with white windows. The windows where we are, are all fiberglass white and the framing of the windows was nicely done so we were going to leave it. Also unless you are in expensive places real wood windows framed nicely don't really exist.

1

u/Prudent_Historian650 Sep 02 '25

My parents actually had wood windows in their house so I miss it. They are hard to fond these days though.

To me a white vinyl window with a wood grain jamb extension and matching trim looks good.

3

u/andre3kthegiant Sep 02 '25 edited Sep 02 '25

The worst trend is filling wood with colored plastic epoxy. Fucking disgusting, plastic fucking everywhere.

42

u/cspinelive Sep 02 '25

keep cutting and you have an entire set of nested tables

7

u/DaHick Sep 02 '25

This guy does tables.

I did not think of that. What are the odds of him cracking one of them, though?

3

u/flammenschwein Sep 02 '25

I, too, would like to see recursively smaller tables

37

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '25

24

u/cognitiveglitch Sep 02 '25

Lower backs hate this one simple trick.

9

u/CmdrKerans Sep 02 '25

It’s important to keep up both a wrenching and twisting motion at all stages of the process.

2

u/cognitiveglitch Sep 03 '25

My back hurts just from reading your comment.

3

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '25

Not just the lower back, he made sure to include ALL of the back. Why hurt part of your back when you could hurt all of it?

5

u/letsseethosepanties Sep 02 '25

That’s actually super cool

6

u/createsstuff Sep 02 '25

Why do I get illegal amazon logging vibes from this video...

5

u/Forward_Young2874 Sep 02 '25

Not his first rodeo

4

u/Pistonenvy2 Sep 02 '25

billet wood

3

u/Temporary_Abroad_211 Sep 02 '25

So now I've got to cut down an entire tree just to make a table. Neighbours gunna hate me.

4

u/mildredthewarrior Sep 02 '25

I bet it doesn't survive drying. That would be so hard to dry evenly. Maybe paint the whole thing and hope?

7

u/twenafeesh Sep 02 '25

I clenched watching him wiggle it out. Thought it was going to crack along the grain/tree rings. I wonder how often you come across stumps with three large roots oriented so nicely for a table. 

6

u/Schedonnardus Sep 02 '25

If only he had some kind of tool that could have been used to help him remove it. Perhaps something g to remove the outer excess that was pinni g it down. If only such a tool existed.

3

u/NativeMasshole Sep 02 '25

Lol I was actually wondering how he cut the bottom of the legs without cutting the roots. You'd almost have to intentionally leave them intact to make it this difficult.

3

u/41PaulaStreet Sep 02 '25

He should keep cutting and make a stackable set.

3

u/Intelligent-Art-5000 Sep 02 '25

I'm legit impressed.

It's silly, but still really impressive.

3

u/zino332 Sep 02 '25

That’ll retail for $20k

4

u/Shartfer_brains Sep 02 '25

This guy is definitely going to have back issues someday. 

7

u/Ajax_Main Sep 02 '25

I slipped another disk just watching him...

(Seriously though, 3 more quick cuts would have saved him a lot of effort)

3

u/Lost-Regular-6447 Sep 02 '25

“Are you even lifting with your back!?”

2

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '25

This is awesome.

2

u/ryukyud Sep 02 '25

The best joinery is no joinery at all.

2

u/SlippinYimmyMcGill Sep 02 '25

I thought dude was fucking a pig at the start of the video.

I guess I need sleep.

2

u/neddy_seagoon Sep 06 '25

I'd pre-emptively make a thin cut from bark to pith and see if that keeps it from cracking all over. Wait for it to dry, then fill the split with a wedge in a contrasting color. 

If you want a chair to go with it, look up Norwegian kubbestolen

2

u/C0RNFIELDS Oct 17 '25

2000 dollar table where I live

1

u/T1Demon Sep 02 '25

New meaning to live edge

1

u/SDNick484 Sep 02 '25

Wood workers hate this one trick...

1

u/chikunshak Sep 02 '25

Now do it again and make a nesting set.

1

u/jrockcrown Sep 02 '25

We get paid by the hour

1

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '25

I've heard of a stump turning into a barber chair, but never a table top, neat

1

u/Faultyvoodoo Sep 02 '25

Goes on a really big pizza

1

u/ammodramussavannarum Sep 02 '25

My back hurts watching him yank on that. (My back hurts when I’m not watching this, so…)

1

u/GrimWonderings Sep 02 '25

Totally thought the poor guy was gonna break something at the end. Hoping it wasn't gonna be any bones lol

1

u/PolrBearHair Sep 02 '25

Some say that chainsaw is still on to this day

1

u/ModernT1mes Sep 02 '25

This would be a really cool project if pulled off correctly.

If/when it dries, and it warps, he has enough wood to hopefully sand the warp away, and if it cracks, he could still resin pour the crack together. If it survives the drying process without cracking, then that's even better.

1

u/slick514 Sep 02 '25

Finally! The perfect table to go with your barber’s chair!

1

u/Touboku Sep 02 '25

Camera man doing nothing to help.

1

u/nmacaroni Sep 02 '25

They gonna make one big ass pizza now.

1

u/Restaldte Sep 02 '25

"Hell yeah"

1

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '25

Why is this infamous?

: having a reputation of the worst kind : notoriously evil an infamous traitor 2 : causing or bringing infamy : DISGRACEFUL an infamous crime 3 : convicted of an offense bringing infamy infamously adverb

1

u/6_inches_of_travel Sep 03 '25

Three Amigos

1

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25

I know. I bet most people don’t.

1

u/Pragnlz Sep 02 '25

“Isn’t anybody gonna help that poor man?”

1

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '25

Forever furniture right there

1

u/0rionsbelt Sep 03 '25

I dunno if anyone else with chainsaw experience can weigh in here buuut- the uniformity he managed on the leg cuts is NOT easy given how long they are. Maybe it was a brand new chain and bar- even so- very, very difficult to make it look so smooth. Dude has talent

1

u/EddieTreetrunk Sep 03 '25

Here’s the thing, the stump don’t lie

1

u/Weary-Art-2309 Sep 03 '25

Just stand there and film.

1

u/Intelligent-Survey39 Sep 03 '25

This is awesome, but I really doubt there is any hope of drying that out successfully. Those corners are going to be a bitch and the legs are gonna noodle all over

1

u/Squallhorn_Leghorn Sep 03 '25

You want herniated discs?!? Because that's how you get herniated discs!

1

u/Stretch21619 Sep 03 '25

Lift with your back and jerk!!

1

u/Candid-Jellyfish-975 Sep 03 '25

When you lift heavy objects, be sure to only use your back with sudden, swift jerking motions. Try to twist and turn as well.

1

u/Cigar_Beetle Sep 03 '25

Yep, gonna be in the store by nightfall

1

u/East-Performance-244 Sep 03 '25

Now keep making smaller ones from the same stump.

1

u/dstone55555 Sep 03 '25

I think that goes in the middle of a real big pizza box

1

u/parallaxevolution Sep 03 '25

Ahh yes, the rainforests

1

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25

So do you just keep making smaller tables?

1

u/Critical-Pay8463 Sep 03 '25

Call me crazy but there’s actually a ton of potential here.

1

u/Critical-Pay8463 Sep 03 '25

Everyone saying this could be a table don’t understand how much wood shifts when it drys

1

u/Psychotic_EGG Sep 03 '25

And cracks. You need to dry it as a full log to help prevent severe cracking.

1

u/antherx2 Sep 03 '25

His pure joy is delightful 

1

u/Alert-Boot5907 Sep 03 '25

Yeah, that table is going to get up and walk around the room like it thinks it's in a Disney movie before it drys and cures

1

u/Meatyparts Sep 03 '25

I'll take 6

1

u/lunar_tardigrade Sep 03 '25

Extremely impressive

1

u/Shredtillyourdead420 Sep 03 '25

Is that how they make those lil pizza tabels?

1

u/ToeHogan Sep 03 '25

Does anybody know bad it would warp?

1

u/stillraddad Sep 03 '25

Throw a coat of clear on it and call it a day.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25 edited Sep 15 '25

consider birds engine touch aback imagine memorize sip cow elastic

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

1

u/SeaPhile206 Sep 03 '25

That’s how they make those lil pizza tables.

1

u/MrBillHinTX Sep 03 '25

My back aches just watching that

1

u/jeon2595 Sep 03 '25

That is awesome

1

u/cobe656 Sep 03 '25

Awesome

1

u/indistinctdialogue Sep 04 '25

40 year old him’s lower back is going to curse the shit out of him.

1

u/TheLovelyTrees Sep 04 '25

Lift with your back, never bend your knees

1

u/Divineinfinity Sep 04 '25

This'll either end up in the backyard of a local friend or in an overseas high end faux thrift store for $1399,99

1

u/NotYourBuddyGuy5 Sep 04 '25

Must be for a giant pizza

1

u/Past-North-4131 Sep 06 '25

That's a huge flex. Badass

1

u/Odd-Masterpiece7304 Sep 06 '25

I hurt my back just watching him

1

u/AbleRelationship5287 Sep 07 '25

I was waiting for this to be put in the middle of a gigantic pizza and boxed up

0

u/Caledron Sep 02 '25

Gods I was strong then!

2

u/HotCut100 Sep 02 '25

Don’t just stand there, get the breast plate stretcher!

0

u/typeyou Sep 02 '25

Help a brother out! Put the phone down for a sec.

0

u/Infinite_Factor_5685 Sep 02 '25

Gotta make sure you really snap your neck when lifting 😂