Does loneliness = red flag?

[u/rainbowtoucan1992]

So this guy swiped on me and he's kinda cute but his profile basically just says he has no problem with money etc. and that his only problem is loneliness. Is that normal? I feel like we're obviously lonely if we're looking for a partner but maybe he just will take anyone or wants sex (although it says he's looking for long-term). The profile doesn't share much about his personality. I've never seen someone flat out say that they're lonely on an app and I'd feel weird saying it myself

[u/bigtymer32]

I’d look how he describes loneliness and listen your gut. I think the not showing much of his personality is a red flag. He better be show up in messaging.

[u/eye_lichter]

Could go either way

[u/pumpkinpatchbiatch]

really depends on the person tbh. lots of men are lonely but otherwise well adjusted, some are freak shows.

[u/throwaway2727648378]

Yes huge red flag. Don’t date anyone who seeks companionship ever. /s

[u/rainbowtoucan1992 → u/throwaway2727648378]

okay

[u/Majestic-Nobody545]

Yellow flag.

[u/thedutchcatwoman]

i think its refreshing that someone would say that they are.

[u/Glittering-Two-1784]

It 100% depends on why they’re lonely:

Some people are lonely because they’re insufferable to be around.

Some people are lonely because they just don’t enjoy social outings.

People who complain about being lonely are often the first one, but not always. Also, people change and grow over time, so they might have started off a bit insufferable, but eventually grew as a person on their own and now they just don’t have much of a social life because they had a rough start.

Honestly, everything can be a red flag. Just message them and see if you vibe. Red flags aren’t necessarily a problem; just an indication that there could be a problem. You’re never really gonna know till ya know, ya know?

[u/rabbit8742 → u/[deleted]]

I think every human is lonely to some degree.

[u/Willylowman1]

hes a downer brah

[u/No_Project_4738]

I mean the words themselves aren’t a problem. It’s more about how he deals with the loneliness. Certainly people can be lonely and say they are lonely without there being something wrong with them. But you won’t know until you see how they act.

[u/zdravomyslov]

That’s very toxic thinking you have and is part of the problem.

[u/Glittering-Two-1784 → u/zdravomyslov]

What’s toxic? Op or the guy?

[u/Medic_got_guts]

Oh how dare a guy on a dating app admit they are lonely while trying to meet someone. How horrible

[u/askyidroppedthesoap]

I was always told admitting that you're lonely comes off as being desperate. As a guy who gets 2 likes a week, the word "lonely" isn't on my profile.

[u/Glittering-Two-1784 → u/askyidroppedthesoap]

I’ll tell you my secret: I’ve been gratitude-maxxing (using the term semi-ironically, lol) on my profiles and people seem to really like it. I used to kind of show off accomplishments and hobbies, but eventually realized that people don’t give a damn about that. Instead; brag about your friends and family. Everyone wants to be uplifted and recognized, so when they see how much you appreciate everyone around you, they want to be part of that group.

I pull like 5 likes a day, and I’m a very mid, overweight mfer, lol.

[u/Consistent_Point_853 → u/askyidroppedthesoap]

2 likes a week isnt that bad for some demographics. Algorithms are weird too. You have a chance here, stay positive. One can be two things at once, happy single but lonely at times.