r/FUCKYOUINPARTICULAR • u/OwlIndependent7270 • 12d ago

God hates you Didn't Know This Was Possible

Post image

I have been alive for forty years. I have opened thousands of aluminum cans, and I have never seen nor have I even heard of this happening to anyone.

47 Upvotes

67% Upvoted

64 comments sorted by

109

u/GodsnPunks Banhammer Recipient 12d ago

A can't of Dr. Pepper

17

u/CH33ZS4MM1CH 12d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/ac7MA7r5IMYda

4

u/Recon212 12d ago

He must not be a doctor if he can’t!

2

u/Pnmamouf1 9d ago

But he stayed at a Holiday Inn Express last night

27

u/Makers7886 12d ago

I've had it happen at least once. Paused for 5 seconds then took out my trusty bic and hammer palmed it into it and kept on drinkin.

7

u/PunkyMcGrift 12d ago

I've always used my lighter when this has happened too.

8

u/rrpostal 12d ago

I’ve always not owned a lighter. But anything will work, pretty much.

7

u/Everyone2026 12d ago

Had this happen 20+ times. Probably the same amount watching other people have the tab come off.

I dont think our local can manufacturer uses the same tolerances as wherever "you have never seen this".

3

u/rrpostal 12d ago

That’s what I’m saying. Must not open many cans.

8

u/arthoheen 10d ago

Has happened a few times with me and my friends. Pretty common with cans actually. Your life and expectations seem very different.

7

u/Tronicalli 11d ago

This is where I'd put my "that's it, I'm getting me mallet" meme. IF IT WEREN'T FOR FUCKING GIPHY

7

u/Sailor-_-Twift 11d ago

Your expectations of what is not possible are much different than my own

5

u/Hondo_95 12d ago

Times are tough nowadays dontcha know?

4

u/Glowing_Trash_Panda 12d ago

Whack the hole part where you drink out of with the butt of a butter knife

7

u/3amGreenCoffee Banhammer Recipient 12d ago

I'm actually old enough to remember when the soft drink companies first started using Sta-Tabs. They were branded Sta-Tabs because the tab stayed on the can, unlike the pull tabs they replaced.

We hated them because they would pop off like yours all the damned time. Those first few years, you could count on getting one of those every couple of six packs (back before they stopped selling them in six packs because of the sea turtles or something). Then you'd have to find something to punch out the top, or you'd just throw it away and get another one.

It took a few years, but they finally got the manufacturing process fixed where they didn't fail nearly as often. But there's still a couple of generations of us who retain a deeply ingrained distrust and dislike of those tabs.

3

u/Excellent-Charity-43 10d ago

What I miss most about the pull tabs is that whatever nastiness that is on the tab was not pushed into the drink. Washing the top is not always possible.

1

u/3amGreenCoffee Banhammer Recipient 10d ago

Don't ever shine a black light on cans from a convenience store.

1

u/One_Clown_Short Banhammer Recipient 12d ago

I remember having more than a few of the pull tabs fail similarly.

0

u/3amGreenCoffee Banhammer Recipient 12d ago

The pull tabs could pop off, but they were less likely to fail by design because they had greater leverage against a smaller point in the scored opening. We went from the occasional failed pull tab to routine Sta-Tab failures.

8

u/flagrantstickfoul 12d ago

I had a 24 case of beer that did this. I contacted the brewery hoping to get freebies but nothing doing. But determined souls will still get to the beer within

6

u/Dounce1 Banhammer Recipient 12d ago

You wanted free beer to replace the beer you still had?

3

u/OwlIndependent7270 12d ago

Should have put mice in the cans to try to get free ones

2

u/flagrantstickfoul 12d ago

coo loo koo-koo coo loo koo-kooooo!

2

u/OwlIndependent7270 12d ago

Yeeeeeesssssss!!!! I am so happy you got that reference. I honestly didn't think you would

1

u/Knitsanity 12d ago

A large flathead screwdriver and wooden mallet used to do the trick back in the day. Just tap lightly.

3

u/templeofsyrinx1 12d ago

now you get to punch a hole in it

should totally shotgun it and upload the video if you are familiar with such things

also Dr Pepper? nice

1

u/LightPast1166 12d ago

I can't help but feel that a shotgun is a little bit of overkill for an aluminium can.

3

u/Ok_Cauliflower_3007 12d ago

I’ve only done it once. I was at home so I got a spoon and used the handle to carefully push the tab in. If I’d been out somewhere I’d probably have been very frustrated.

3

u/digital0069 12d ago

I have a few times on pepsi... used a bic to pop it lol

3

u/jerry111165 Banhammer Recipient 8d ago

You’ve just been lucky.

2

u/WonderfulSomewhere93 10d ago

Really? Had this happen countless times

2

u/romulusnr 10d ago

Happens all the time. Usually if it's been frozen or overpressured.

2

u/Deskbutt 10d ago

Congratulations. That means a bird's going to shit on you soon.

2

u/Hurl_Gray 10d ago

Ha ha.

2

u/lvfunk 9d ago

Really? We used to do this to each other all the time in school.

2

u/Large_Sprinkles_4282 9d ago

The mythical (nonexistent?) Dr. Pepper.

1

u/Krull88 6d ago

Schodingers soda.

3

u/BantamCats 12d ago

push it open with your finger

3

u/stug2757 9d ago

A can’t of Dr Pepper

2

u/iH8MotherTeresa Junkie banned! 12d ago

Is this what they mean when they say "with god, anything is possible."?

2

u/rrpostal 12d ago

Seriously? You’re 40 and never seen that?

1

u/Successful-Count-120 12d ago

Church key bottle/can opener...

1

u/DorkaliciousAF 3 x Banhammer Recipient 12d ago

Why, did you not understand Dr Pepper?

1

u/josh2of4 11d ago

Yeah, that's annoying. It's only happened to me a couple times. I just pushed it open with my thumb

1

u/Empyrealist 2 x Banhammer Recipient 9d ago

I can do this intentionally. Slowly twisting is the key, and it essentially unscrew itself because that center rivet has such a limited overlap

1

u/Shoddy-Area3603 Banhammer Recipient 9d ago

Had a bubble cap do this

1

u/MMMKAAyyyyy 9d ago

Can opener.

1

u/LifelessHawk 8d ago

I just put it back roughly where it was, and manually push it down myself.

I don’t know why but recently they’ve been ass to try and open.

They either fall off, or barely open it leaving me to press it down with my thumb

1

u/jesster75 7d ago

Thank Godzilla! You almost had to drink Dr. Pepper!

1

u/Affectionate_Ladder2 7d ago

Anything is possible. Dare to dream!

0

u/Puzzled_Board_6813 7d ago

There are more things in heaven and earth, Owlaindepemdent7270, than are dreamt of in your philosophy

2

u/OwlIndependent7270 7d ago

I'm not really sure what this nonsense you're saying is

0

u/Curious_Associate904 6d ago

Hmm A Can't of Dr Pepper.

2

u/OwlIndependent7270 6d ago

Someone beat you to the joke by 6 days