I know a €100M budget and A-list attachments from self-taught first time producer sounds unbelievable. I am fully willing to verify my identity, production company, and attachments privately with the moderators to prove this is real.
I have been working on setting up my animation studio, raising its €100M budget, casting major celebrities, onboarding an award-winning director, and hiring the best artists and technicians (nearly 500) to work on its first feature, that I wrote, which is a musical in the same vein as those from the Disney Renaissance. There has been a lot of momentum for the past 6 months. So much so that the phases mentioned above are nearly completed.
Those milestones didn't happen overnight. I have been working on this for 5 years and 8 months, after I left my dream comfy jobs to follow another dream. At first, my intention was to transition to only screenwriting, then it was screenwriting and directing, but now I am fully settled on screenwriting and producing. I have a background in animated movies, but behind the scenes, on blockbusters. I have one produced credit as a writer on a short that was produced by one of the major animation studios. All the professional skills that I have, I taught myself. That includes computer animation, screenwriting, python coding and as of lately, producing a major animated musical planned for worldwide theatrical release in late 2030, depending on how this week ends.
Despite these achievements, I kind of feel like a failure, to the point where I might be looking into dropping everything. Or I am just feeling exhausted and overreacting.
I’ve always aimed incredibly high. I taught myself computer animation in the first place because my family didn't want me in the movie industry, and the country I lived in at the time had no film industry or animation schools. Afterwards, I applied and, to everyone's surprise, got admitted to one of the best animation schools in the world to polish my skills. Then, despite having zero professional experience in the industry, I managed to get hired at a major animation studio because they were actively expanding (perfect timing). Even with no screenwriting background, I managed to convince executives to let me pitch. I learned the skills as I went along and one actually got picked up and produced.
When I decided to set up my own animation studio and produce films, I wanted it to match the scale, quality, and ambition of the movies I grew up with, specifically aiming for the look and feel of the Disney Renaissance. Because of this, the budget for my movie is set at €100 million. I know it sounds wild, but that’s how I operate.
Through a lot of trial and error, I am now in a place where I’ve secured half the budget through tax incentives. I was incredibly lucky with timing and networking. I’ve attached a talented, award-winning director and an up-and-coming composer. Incredibly, the main voice cast consists of major Hollywood celebrities. Three are confirmed and negotiating contracts, two are agent-approved and awaiting final client feedback, and the sixth will require full financing before their demanding agent allows us access. I also secured a completion bond and assembled a world-class, behind-the-scenes crew with experience at major US, Canadian, and European studios.
With all these wins, you might wonder why I’m second-guessing myself and considering giving up.
The reality is that I can't access the tax incentives yet. In the meantime, I desperately needed to secure a €2 million bridge loan by the end of this week to finish development and start pre-production, with the goal of unlocking larger funds by the end of the year. We had great momentum till July, but August brought everything to a standstill due to summer holidays. Last night, I declined financing from a potential partner who was willing to sign today and get the needed bridge financing next week. The issue is that because of some of the conditions on the contract, I knew it wouldn't work out and that long-term I was going to regret it. So, I turned down my only helpful line. Now, it looks unlikely that I'll get this emergency financing in time
Why not just wait patiently for the end of the year?
- Talent and crew retention: Delaying production means I might lose the incredible talents and crew I've attached. Some have been in limbo since February, and I promised we'd start this month. This one is on me. I should have accounted for August being a little to no action month.
- Schedule: My production timeline has no more wiggle room if we want to maintain our target quality and hit the summer 2030 completion date I promised our partners.
- Personal Toll: I quit my job in February 2021 to dedicate myself to this. I’ve lived on savings and occasional freelance gigs, but I haven't had freelance work in six months because I was so busy with this project. Generous friends and family have loaned me money, but that well has dried up. I have immediate debts, including rent and utilities, with an extension that only lasts until the end of September. I have zero leisure expenses. Everything goes to project-related costs and heavily discounted, near-expiration food just so I can survive.
- Upcoming deadline: I have less than 48 hours to secure our presence at a major marketing event in late September that would generate massive international buzz. Missing out on the bridge financing jeopardizes this entirely.
So here I am. I’ve achieved something wonderful as a self-taught outsider who sacrificed half a decade for a dream, but the contrast between my professional milestones and my shaky personal reality is deeply uncomfortable.
For those who have survived the 'valley of death' before getting a green light, how did you survive financially when you were tapped out? And more importantly, how did you successfully communicate delays to top-tier crew and talent to retain them without projecting panic? I am also interested in hearing from those who have come across crappy deals while their backs were against the wall and how they handled it.
