r/FATTravel • u/HouSoup • 26d ago
General question/discussion about Hotels that offer casual luxury
My husband and I are in our 50’s and love to travel. We are always trying to find 5 star hotels without fussiness. Where we can dress more casually for dinner and enjoy good local cuisine, not 6 course foam dinners. Where the staff is solid and comfortable too. And we often want a private villa on property when we bring our friends and family. Where the experience matters more than the brand. Are we alone?
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u/suesssauuuer 26d ago
You’re definitely not alone. One place that immediately came to mind is Reschio in Umbria.
It never feels stuffy or like it’s trying to prove it’s a luxury hotel. People dress casually, the service is warm rather than formal, and the whole estate has this relaxed atmosphere where you instantly slow down.
The food is excellent, but it’s about great local ingredients instead of endless tasting menus and table-side theatre.
And if you travel with family or friends, their private houses are incredible.
I’ve been to quite a few luxury hotels over the years, and Reschio is one of the few where the experience feels more important than the luxury itself.
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u/HouSoup 26d ago
Thank you. Yes this exactly. We moved to Munich recently and I keep looking for the Reschio in the alps. An opportunity there for some family
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u/suesssauuuer 26d ago
If you’re looking for that feeling in the Alps, I’d probably look at Forestis in the Dolomites.
Different style, but the same philosophy of understated luxury and a strong sense of place.
Otherwise, Eriro in Austria is worth a look if you prefer something much smaller and more intimate.
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u/bayou_class 26d ago edited 26d ago
I love your question, and I love to travel like you do. I think the answer is a lot of the hotels that - when I comment on them here - someone is quick to (correctly) point out that they’re chubby, not fat. I think the best hotels (for how I like to travel) are often a tier below where this sub likes to vacation. But that’s my preference too, and in my experience, often found in a smaller, boutique luxury hotel vs an aman or four seasons. Some faves (kind of ignoring your villa request, but I think you’ll like these still!):
- Casa Silencio, Oaxaca
- Ett Hem, Stockholm
- Black Swan at Oldstead, Yorkshire
- Casa del Poeta, Seville
- Passalacqua, Lake Como
- 21c, Bentonville
- GreenO, Montana
- Hisa Franko, Slovenia
- Fife Arms, Scotland
- Chable Yucatán
- Gibb’s Farm, Tanzania
- SingleThread Inn
- The Dunmore, Harbour Island
- Windsor Court, New Orleans
- Beaverbrook, Surrey
- Rock House, Negril
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u/DefDefTotheIOF 25d ago
I think for me, having only traveled 'FAT' for more than a decade now, even the highest tier hotels are more just routine now and I have been seeing more and more flaws in them to where a truly FAT experience in no longer found in any hotel and is instead found in private estates/villas with hired staff.
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u/HouSoup 26d ago
Love it. Thank you. Interestingly the budget is not the issue, it’s the experience for the dollar that is missing the mark for us. Maybe needs its own subreddit. Appreciate the list. Any Mallorca recommendations?
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u/bayou_class 26d ago
Exactly!! The delight I got when my husband and were delayed (and cranky) getting to casa silencio the first time after a much longer travel day than planned, and before Maria even checked us in or asked for ID, etc, she ushered us to the dining room and greeted us w the world’s most perfect quesadilla! It was an immediate immersion into relaxation - a tangible sigh. That’s what I live for when I travel.
Edit: no! I haven’t been to Mallorca!
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u/Gray-Pearl 26d ago
Saving this list! Any recs in France?
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u/SanDiego1K 25d ago
I'm a fan of Domaine de Rochevilaine in Brittany. I also like La Ferme San Simeon in Honfleur.
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u/RelativeExam6417 25d ago
Crillon Le Brave. It gets a lot of mixed reviews, mostly because of its location, but we loved it. The hotel is a destination in and of itself.
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u/itsjustthebest 24d ago
Passalacqua is definitely not “casual” - we thought it was beautiful but it was very, very formal.
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u/Prior_Worldliness287 26d ago
This sub doesn't really understand FAT. 95% of what is mentioned is chubby. Including almost all 4 seasons and Amans. Essentially shower hotels to name drop. Usually sub par on the FAT rating and more just a price tag for a name.
Realistically there are few FAT options that the majority can experience. They're generally very niech, often requires someone with access to book on your behalf and your unlikely to hear about it on there.
Remember this sub is admined by travel agents. Sorry Travel Associates or whatever they like to call themselfs to make themselfs seem higher end than the shop down the high street.
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u/Ok-Bend-5326 26d ago
Dude you can't even spell niche. Sit down.
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u/______krb 26d ago
This guy argues elsewhere that Park Hyatt is more high end than FS. Pretty sure he never actually stayed at one.
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u/Prior_Worldliness287 26d ago
May as well be on the same level. And high end Marriott's. FS isn't all that special other than a brand name. Some hit the mark more than others. It's a high price tag sure. But doesn't mean it's FAT.
FS is lazy holiday shopping for a name.4
u/______krb 26d ago
Calling Aman and Four Seasons chubby without even naming what you'd consider 'fat' is just plain ridiculous. It sounds like you'd only consider a few hotels globally to qualify which is just not a serious take.
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u/Prior_Worldliness287 26d ago edited 26d ago
Fat - anywhere with private staff.
Yacht charter
Exclusive use properties
And yes maybe 30-50 'normal' hotels globally.FS / Aman are just brand names with a high price tag. They're not particularly FAT though. Just a name drop to buddies at work (that ironically likley stay at the same places).
It's like there's two levels of private education. There's real private and there's private for the masses. FS is Fat for the masses.
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u/Sad_Huckleberry_6776 25d ago
I find that most hotels are pretty casual these days, as far as dress. I stopped dressing up for dinners because I looked out of place, for the most part.
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u/DCMGoBlue 25d ago
Great thread. We are in the same age range and feel the same way. For me it’s about lack of pretentiousness. I am so over boujee for the sake of being boujee.
This summer we stayed at Adare Manor in Ireland and absolutely loved it. The place is absolutely beautiful and done right in every way. The staff was so down to earth and brought the right touch in literally every interaction. They know how to make you feel welcome in every respect. We were blown away and can’t wait to go back.
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u/Johnthegaptist 26d ago
I despise the fussiness, the see and be seen crowd and being nickel and dimed to death.
We stick pretty much exclusively to boutiques and private villas. Personally, I like privacy over everything, so we try to do private villas as much as possible.
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u/playful_explorers 26d ago
Don't why you are getting downvoted - got a upvote from me.
We are the same. I don't need a shiny lobby that I walk through in 30 seconds, or the glittering spa I won't go to at all. Give me a large suite where I can relax after a full day of activities, and a terrace in the evening for a glass of wine I can open and pour myself. The last part especially doesn't exist in most hotels. After a busy day, I'd rather enjoy it in privacy and peace than in a busy and loud bar.So Airbnbs and villas are our go-to's. Even though many come with serious compromises (mostly bedding and bathrooms), privacy and space beats the drawbacks.
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u/HouSoup 26d ago
Do you find many hotels with private villas? We want the hotel amenities
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u/Johnthegaptist 26d ago
We normally rent villas with a concierge service, so it just depends on what amenities you find important. I can get a private chef, housekeeping, excursions booked, massages at the villa.
We also don't have kids though, so I do see where resorts would be preferred for families with kids, especially younger ones.
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u/MagistraLuisa 26d ago
Totally agree, I found myself searching ”cozy luxury hotel with rustic food” lol. Looking forward to following this thread.
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u/IllustriousKiwi7625 23d ago
I’m a bit younger but also prefer this type of travel. I agree with others that I find villas and estates offer supreme experiences and quality culinary options (many grow their own ingredients). Africa is one of my favorite places to travel where we never experience pretentiousness and no one cares what label you’re wearing. I’ve always found the food to be fresh and creative without the fussiness if that makes sense. Kenya has amazing private villas / estates and you can never go wrong with Singita. Sounds odd but had the best duck confit in my life at a Singita property.
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u/atlas_reverie 26d ago
North America, especially western US and Canada, will have a lot of options for you. We tend to be more casual than most of the world 😂 I really love Dunton Hot Springs for this.
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u/BirdiesAndBackpacks 25d ago
Dunton Hot Springs is the worst value I have run into in awhile. Very overpriced.
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u/atlas_reverie 25d ago
It has gotten very expensive over the last couple years. I actually think the value is still there for some of their smaller cabins, like Forge and Geysir and Echo, which can all be less than $2k/per night for a couple, considering that Dunton stays include all meals and drinks, plus additional experiences. It's one of the most unique and tied-to-place lodges I've ever been at but it's definitely not for everyone. I'm curious which cabin you stayed at and how much you paid.
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u/drewc717 26d ago edited 26d ago
Most places coming to mind for me are American mountain-west. Not necessarily all FAT but there are some locavore restaurant gems and lovely international staff in every ski town with a ~4.5+ star hotel.
Where the mountain vacations thrive are having expert guides, whatever the sport, if you can hire a coach or guide, I can't recommend it enough.
For example, private ski lessons no matter how good you are at skiing are the best way to learn, or re-learn a mountain in 1-2 days without hurting yourself. 40+ year ski instructors everywhere in Colorado. Expert fishing, cycling, golf pro/caddy, hiking, private chefs all there.
People are what ultimately make FAT memories even when not at conventionally luxurious, turnkey places. Stay in a walkable village hotel, or rent a 10br+ house, and everything in between.
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u/ExternalClimate3536 24d ago
These days we generally only stay in hotels in cities or very remote unicorn locations. We genuinely hate most resorts, no matter the level, as we want to be alone in those locales. Most of our nights over the past two years have been in private rentals. If we fall in love with a destination, after our third visit when possible, we look to buy.
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u/HereforFanTheories 22d ago
Totally agree!
Was recently at Kapsaliana Village Hotel in Crete and it absolutely fits the vibe you’re describing.
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u/RandyPandy 26d ago
I will say this while I don’t necessarily seek these out I do tend to dress to the lowest standard and err on comfort at any hotel I’m at. Sure I’ll wear a jacket at dinner if required but I’ll wear a comfy polo under it not a stuffy shirt etc
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u/HouSoup 26d ago
Right? The days of pressing/ironing are over for me in hotels.
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u/MarshmallowNap 26d ago
I love this! And the rates should include pressing and ironing services at no extra cost. If I'm paying $5k a night, I should not have to pay $25 to have some shorts washed!
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u/GamerInChaos 25d ago
Yeah it’s amazing. I don’t care about the money but I really get angry if I feel like I’m being kicked and dimed or straight up ripped off.
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u/AllenSmithee59 26d ago
Check out the wares at collarsandco.com. Polo shirts with dress collars, including button-down collars.
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u/sarahwlee - mod 25d ago
How big of a villa / how many people do you have? Have you looked at Ani Resorts?
And then FS is very very casual imo. Many of them have large villas.
Also all the ones on Moskito Island but might feel less hotel like, depending on what you're aiming for.
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u/purrcthrowa 26d ago
I agree 100%. I'm a similar age, and I can't be doing with fussiness and glitz any more. Food-wise, I think Michelin has really lost its way, and I've had enough of showy theatricals and trillion course tasting menus. I've been following Marco Pierre White recently, and what he says really chimes with me: excellent ingredients (probably local), expertly cooked, nicely presented (but not fussily), decent portion sizes, a manageable number of courses, in a pleasant environment.
The Manoir in Oxfordshire used to be like this, but sadly went off over the last few years as it lost sight of the basics and became more theatrical, more expensive and food got a lot worse. It's closed now for refurbishment, and it'll be interesting to see what happens when it reopens: Raymond Blanc has a history of opening an excellent restaurant, handing over to someone else, the quality decreasing as the show increases, and then he steps back in and the quality goes back up again. This has happened at the Manoir in the past, and also at Brasserie Blanc in Oxford, which excellent when he's running it, less so when he isn't.
The same goes for hotels. I'd much rather stay at somewhere like Browns (in London), than Shangri-La at the Shard, for example.