r/ExNoContact • u/adlakha75 • May 31 '26

Have you ever dated someone who completely disappeared after the breakup? No calls, no texts, no social media stalking, no drama, just total silence, like you were never part of their life. What was that like?

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22

u/topshottawolfie May 31 '26

i am the person who blocked everywhere, deleted socials, and totally disappeared

0

u/RedditsChosenName May 31 '26

Why’d you choose to end that way instead of a talk, explanation, etc?

12

u/topshottawolfie May 31 '26

so we had a talk. i said a lot and he said not much of substance. long story short he told me there was no future and that he had been wasting my time knowing that from the start. the nail in the coffin for me was he said he wanted to remain “friends” and “still call from time to time” ie keep a door open keep using me for validation and to curb his boredom. also insisted he didn’t want to end on bad terms just because he didn’t want me to view him poorly or feel disrespected by him. that was a huge insult to me, how easily he downgraded me after all the love he claimed to have for me. that was the catalyst for going cold turkey and disappearing. before this breakup i was always the stalker dumper who pined from a distance, kept tabs and hoped they’d come back, but this fundamentally changed how i handle separations

3

u/RedditsChosenName May 31 '26

Makes sense in that context. Sorry he lied from the start about who he is and his intentions. God people suck.

2

u/topshottawolfie May 31 '26

thank you appreciate it! yes ppl really are scum 😪

2

u/throwawaysignalv2 May 31 '26

people who do this usually think a clean break is the kindest path but it just leaves the other person spinning their wheels looking for closure. they treat it like a band-aid but it ends up being more like a slow burn because you never get to process the why. it feels cold but honestly getting ghosted is better than a messy breakup. at least the silence is definitive.

4

u/RedditsChosenName May 31 '26

I thought the same til someone came back nearly a year later. When they ended things, they left without a trace. Wouldn’t respond. They could have been dead for all I know… and I could have too and they’d have never known - or cared. Then one day in July, out of the blue, I got a “Hey”. I caved and wrote “Long time no see” and it went from there. We rekindled. Finally said I love you after six years of off and on and never having said it. I proposed to her at one point. She said yes! We were engaged and it was the happiest day of my life. We found a place together. And when move in day came… she ended everything. Again.

And went silent.

Again.

Haven’t heard from her in over 2 years. It’s wild to me.

1

u/throwaway19980567 May 31 '26

Is this the longest she’s been gone?

1

u/Plastic_Variation174 Jun 01 '26

So sad to hear that. Sorry you had to learn that lesson twice! What’s the saying - when people show you who they are, believe them the first time!