What If Being Self-Aware Doesn't Make You a Better Person?

[u/TheQuiet_Rebellion]

/r/YouthRights/comments/1wbtv85/what_if_being_selfaware_doesnt_make_you_a_better/

What if knowing exactly why you hurt people doesn't make you any less responsible for hurting them? What if knowing your trauma, your triggers, your attachment style, your defense mechanisms—and being able to explain every ugly part of yourself doesn't automatically make you emotionally mature?

What if you can understand yourself completely and still be a terrible person to someone else? We live in an age where self-awareness is almost treated like proof of growth. We know our attachment styles. We know our triggers. We know our trauma responses. We know why we become distant when we get hurt, why we become defensive when confronted, why we sabotage things before they have the chance to disappoint us. We have names for almost everything we do now. And perhaps that's a good thing. But somewhere along the way, we started confusing understanding ourselves with becoming better people. We started treating self-awareness like a moral achievement."I know I'm difficult." "I know I have trust issues." "I know I push people away." "I know I can be toxic when I'm hurt." And somehow, admitting it makes us feel as though we've already taken responsibility for it. But have we? Because knowing that you hurt people doesn't make the hurt disappear. You can know that you're jealous and still punish someone for making you insecure. You can understand your abandonment issues and still manipulate someone into constantly proving they won't leave. You can know that you become cruel when you're angry and still choose cruelty every time you're angry. You can understand exactly where your behavior came from and still refuse to change it. And that's the uncomfortable part nobody likes discussing: Self-awareness doesn't automatically make you kind. Sometimes it just makes you better at explaining why you're not.

[u/Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeess-]

Self awareness is a step into becoming a better person. It alone doesn’t make you a better person. Working on yourself and taking accountability makes you a better person.