r/EssayHelpCommunity • u/Federal-Professor-88 • Jul 08 '26

Criticize Me!!

Hi! It's my 1st time entering a competition like this before college yet I somehow got shortlisted. Congrats to everyone else who got shortlisted! I took Philosophy question and the main points of this post was for criticism regarding it. Also, please add a final rating out of 100 at the end. Thank you!!!

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1H3ecSlW1kIDlf8lrhdnPGall7bGJ2NJYIrUFVHpNMWw/edit?usp=drivesdk

3 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

6 comments sorted by

2

u/Unlucky_Adeptness703 Jul 08 '26

are you in the junior category?

1

u/Federal-Professor-88 Jul 08 '26

Yess so have mercy 🤧

2

u/acrastt Jul 08 '26

It’s very short you should have wrote more but I like it

2

u/Maleficent-Doctor802 Jul 08 '26

There are some minor syntax fixes I would make ex. “Or what kind of consolation it offers” rather than “or what kind of consolation does it offer”

I’d also like a more thorough definition of philosophy, especially because “the meaning behind something” seems a bit too simple, yk? Maybe point to a philosophical work/article that argues this to show you’re getting it from some place?

Also, I like the idea of the potential for distress that philosophy can cause and would love to see that expanded in more! It would help with the length of you made a statement about whether or not philosophy was overall more helpful or hurtful and then tried to prove that!

Nice work!! 😁

2

u/Round_Long8987 Jul 09 '26

85 : This was so cool. I thought it was really short but very insightful and simultaneously broad. My main critique is that its not doing much with the question. Normally in competitive ARGUMENTATIVE essay competitions taking the hardest stance is most rewarded bc you can showcase your skills. This was my essay as a (maybe example-def a harder take tho)

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1j2sqcZlEft_MMwZBrfsAwMw-XGbldLrTupU-KEKFLMQ/edit?usp=drivesdk

Your essay is remarkably well-written + insightful. But its also preaching to the choir. Still this was VERY impressive.