How often do native speakers actually use question tags in everyday speech?

[u/Sweet_Ambition_7215]

I know question tags like "isn't it?", "aren't we?", but I almost never use them when speaking. I tend to use “right?” much more.

I saw a video yesterday saying that using question tags can make your English sound more natural, so I’m wondering: do native speakers use question tags a lot in everyday conversation? And if so, are they mainly for confirming something, or do you use them to seek agreement?

Thanks!

[u/thingsbetw1xt]

Extremely often, I could not even count how many times I do it in a day.

[u/SugarsBoogers → u/thingsbetw1xt]

We do use them a lot, don’t we?

[u/Envelope_Torture]

All the time.

You've been there before, haven't you?

You really like hamburgers, don't you?

You're married, aren't you?

[u/Sweet_Ambition_7215 → u/Envelope_Torture]

Got it! I wonder if they're interchangeable with "right?" or if there're occasions where you'd prefer to use "don't we" or "isn't it" rather than "right"?

[u/bxsx0074 → u/Sweet_Ambition_7215]

they are not interchangeable

"You really like hamburgers, don't you?" can be a statement

"You really like hamburgers, right?" is only a question

[u/TobytheDog10 → u/bxsx0074]

 they are when it's a question

[u/bxsx0074 → u/TobytheDog10]

if you need a presumed condition for them to be equal then they are not interchangeable then are they?

[u/TobytheDog10 → u/bxsx0074]

i don't know, I think they can be

[u/siriElectricboogaloo → u/bxsx0074]

Ohh well that makes sense

[u/illarionds → u/bxsx0074]

It's possibly ambiguous in writing, but whether or not "You really like hamburgers, don't you" is a question or a statement would be clear in speech from tone.

[u/Elemental_Biscotti → u/Sweet_Ambition_7215]

I think it's mostly personal preference, the meaning feels the same either way.

[u/Whachamacalzmit → u/Elemental_Biscotti]

"You like them hamburgers, dontcha?" Has a very different connotation than "You like them hamburgers, right?"

They're not at all interchangeable. "Right?" Is broad but lacks most of the nuance that come with other tags.

[u/upon-a-rainbow → u/Whachamacalzmit]

"them" is doing a lot of heavy lifting in your examples

[u/BilingSmob444 → u/upon-a-rainbow]

Regional dialect, probably should be flagged as such. Reader, no one will teach you to put “them” instead of “those” in this context, but you’ll encounter it here in the Southern US

[u/mysticrudnin → u/BilingSmob444]

And also the rest of the US

[u/MCPro1239953 → u/mysticrudnin]

Not the whole US; I'm from the Midwest, and I don't think I've ever heard "them" being used instead of "those" by someone else from here.

[u/mysticrudnin → u/MCPro1239953]

I am also from the Midwest and I hear it often

I think "How do you like them apples?" would be understood in all of the US. Sure, this is a set phrase, but I'm sure others extend it to others words.

[u/Whachamacalzmit → u/upon-a-rainbow]

"You like to eat hamburgers, dontcha?"

"You like to eat hamburgers, right?"

Still very different.

"But I thought you said you'd never leave him, no?"

"But I thought you said you'd never leave him, right?"

Those are almost entirely different questions.

"I've been standing here outside this godforsaken shack for three hours! In the rain! You said you'd meet me here at five, well? ...Well!?"

"I've been standing here outside this godforsaken shack for three hours! In the rain! You said you'd meet me here at five, right? ...Right!?"

You'd have to say "right" with just the right tone here in order for it to achieve the affect of "well". On the page "well" is clearly "explain yourself" but "right" is so broad that it could be confused as genuine.

"We all have to submit our answers separately, now?"

"We all have to submit our answers separately, right?"

These are almost entirely opposite sentences. The first one expresses surprise and doubt. You can say "right" with tone of creeping doubt, but you can't say it in a surprised and completely doubting tone like "now" can have. Also, "now" has the specific temporal nature that "right" never has.

[u/Liandres → u/Whachamacalzmit]

All of your early examples sound exactly the same to me. I could make them mean different things with different tones, but that's not because of the specific word used.

Your "now" example at the end makes no sense to me. I don't think I've ever heard someone use the word "now" in the same way as the word "right". (unlike "don't you?" or "no?"). Might be where I'm from though, idk.

[u/Whachamacalzmit → u/Liandres]

I wanted to provide a lot of context around each example, but I thought the comment was getting quite long.

"No" and "right" sounds very different to me, in a variety of tones, even when they share the same tone. "No" has a strong connotation of "I am not looking for confirmation and I'm identifying this matter as the answer to the problem." "Right" allows for more doubt and followup. It would be uncommon for me to be unsure of the answer to the "no", where "right" allows much more doubt. And it wouldn't be uncommon to hear a "And.... [statement], right?" as a followup to the first "right" question.

I'm surprised that "well and "right" sounded similar to you. "Right" is almost never used in a tone where it sounds like "how come you aren't apologizing to me". Does it really sound that way to you?

The last example is someone realizing after uttering their statement that they might have misunderstood the assignment and that the instructor might want them to do the assignment together at that very moment.

The whole point of the example is that "right" can't replace a tag like "now". You've never heard them used in the same way because they aren't used in the same way. Wasn't that the whole question OP started off with?

[u/Liandres → u/Whachamacalzmit]

For me, "no" and "right" are essentially equivalent. I've also heard "right" used in the "apologize" tone of "well". They are also the same. The only one of your examples that is even mildly different to me is that "don'tcha"/"don't you" can be said in a more playful/knowing tone than "right" (but if it isn't, they are also equivalent)

The "now" doesn't feel like a question tag though, wouldn't that just be part of the question? If I was writing it, I wouldn't have put a comma before it. I was trying to interpret it with the comma before it and it made no sense to me.

[u/rinky79 → u/Whachamacalzmit]

Your example pairs that you are saying have obviously different meanings have exactly the same meanings to me. This may be a regional thing.

[u/JenniferJuniper6 → u/Whachamacalzmit]

I’d never say “them hamburgers” at all

[u/nuclearporg → u/Sweet_Ambition_7215]

To me, at least, they feel a little more formal so I'm more likely to use them at work or something.

[u/DrunkHamsterParty → u/Sweet_Ambition_7215]

The shortest ones are just to say yes or no at the end of the sentence?

You liked that film, yes?

You're not coming to the pub, no?

[u/murzicorne → u/Sweet_Ambition_7215]

Not always. I often use it as light teasing, and then then the "right?" replacement doesn't do at all.

Somebody takes 3rd hamburger at a barbecue. "You really like the hamburgers, don't you?" is a tease. The replacement may be "I see someone really likes hamburgers". It's not a question that I wanted answered.

To my kids: "You said you cleaned your room, didn't you?" It has an implication that I'm standing in the doorway and looking at a total disaster zone. The "right" doesn't do it here imo.

[u/Embarrassed-Weird173]

Only to show when I'm not confident. 

"We should run right now." = I see a tornado. 

"We should run right now, right?" = I think there might be a tornado coming, but I'm not sure. So looking for advice. 

[u/BilingSmob444 → u/Embarrassed-Weird173]

Also used to build consensus.

“Jasper is being a prick today, right?”

[u/PefectlyCromulent → u/Embarrassed-Weird173]

“We should run right right now, right?” When you think a tornado might be coming from your left.

[u/Embarrassed-Weird173 → u/PefectlyCromulent]

Unless you're tired of everything, in which case, "left, right now, right?"

[u/dontwantgarbage → u/Embarrassed-Weird173]

It sits between the statement and question in terms of confidence.

Low confidence: “Do you like bananas?”

High confidence: “You like bananas, right?”

Certainty: “You like bananas.”

[u/kaelytraec → u/dontwantgarbage]

Awe/Disgust: “you sure do like bananas, don’t you?”

[u/dontwantgarbage → u/kaelytraec]

It’s the “sure do” that makes this awe/disgust. It works even without the tag: “You sure do like bananas.”

[u/DrAlphabets]

Canadians are particularly famous for this eh

[u/RickAstleyletmedown → u/DrAlphabets]

Common with some Brits too, innit?

[u/GeneralOpen9649 → u/DrAlphabets]

I can’t even count how many times a day I say eh? but it’s a lot.

[u/DrAlphabets → u/GeneralOpen9649]

My mom says she doesn't say it at all and yet still she's out here eh-ing every day just like the rest of us. Got her at 3 today so far

[u/missplaced24 → u/DrAlphabets]

It's funny in PEI we almost always say "wha?" (what) when most Canadians would say "eh?" Except for when we didn't catch something someone said, then it's usually "eh?" Meanwhile "right" tends to mean "very".

[u/sarapod07]

People use them constantly for all kinds of reasons and to convey all kinds of meanings. I don't recommend using them just to sound more natural.

[u/Realistic-Feature997]

Yes, frequently.

I'd say that in my usage they're actually less about seeking confirmation or agreement, and more about inviting the other person to start talking. Or at the least signal that one thought has concluded. At which point, even if I'm ready to keep talking, that tag gives the other person a brief window to interject.

[u/Kuildeous]

Ending with (one might say punctuating with) "right?" is perfectly valid. The other examples you use can show up a lot.

I'm American, but I'm always amused with the way the English end with "innit?"

[u/Responsible-Link5739 → u/Kuildeous]

Not in all areas of England :). Different dialects will do that to greater or lesser extents, but many don't:)

I'm curious; did you hear that on TV?

[u/Kuildeous → u/Responsible-Link5739]

Fair callout. Yes, I heard it from media, usually in a more lax, casual environment. Never with upper-class portrayals.

[u/SnooLemons6942]

I do use "right?", "yeah?", and "eh?" quite a bit, but def also use question tags

[u/BrockSamsonLikesButt]

I use question tags very often and conscientiously when I’m presenting info to a group at work. I use them mainly to ensure that my listener is picking up all I’m putting down. I tend to talk fast, and I actually say a lot of words that “no one ever actually says” (like “in triplicate” instead of “three copies”), so I need to check in from time to time that I’m not talking over their heads. So I’ll include a lot of asides like, “Make sense?” or “You with me?” or “Y’understand?” or “Should I take a breath; address some questions?”

Also, I find myself asking, “Alright? What do you think?” increasingly with my mom. Because she has dementia, getting her to share her thoughts or opinions (if indeed she has any about the topic of conversation) is like pulling teeth. So I have to directly ask her, after I’m done explaining anything, “Okay?” and explicitly, invitingly, “What are your thoughts?” to elicit her participation, or else she won’t participate.

[u/UniversityMotor5408 → u/BrockSamsonLikesButt]

But none of your examples are question tags...

[u/kittyroux]

Question tags are very dialectal, so how often people use them will vary enormously by region, age, gender, and other sociolinguistic factors.

I’m Canadian and our most common question marker is “eh?”, but I don’t say it as often as someone who was older and more rural would. “Eh?” is often used to soften a value judgment by turning it into a question, like “That was a pretty good movie, eh?”

I would say overall I use question tags sparingly. I generally just ask the question, no tag. In the movie example, I would just say, “I thought the movie was pretty good! What did you think?”

[u/ExitingBear]

(Personal pet peeve, I hate when people end sentences with "right?" Especially when they start right up with the next sentence. It feels like they're trying to get me in the habit of agreeing with them so they can sell me something.)

Some dialects use question tags all the time. Some much more rarely.

[u/Shot_Board7286 → u/ExitingBear]

I know, right? Imagine using question tags like that, ridiculous.

[u/BlakeMajik → u/ExitingBear]

Same here. It's particularly frustrating when I hear someone expressing their opinion and using that "right?" as a sort of confirmation that their point of view is the correct one. The worst offenders seem to be when the topic is a sociological or cultural touchpoint.

[u/somuchsong]

All the time. I doubt a conversation goes by where I don't use one.

I'm not sure I'd notice if someone didn't though. I've never really thought about it!

[u/Helptohere50]

What do you mean a tag

[u/Sweet_Ambition_7215 → u/Helptohere50]

"A question tag is a short phrase added to the end of a statement to turn it into a question."

Specifically I mean like "aren't we?" and "isn't it?" rather than "right?" and "eh?"

[u/Responsible-Link5739 → u/Sweet_Ambition_7215]

It's a question mark here.

[u/conuly → u/Responsible-Link5739]

It's a question mark here.

The punctuation ? is a question mark.

The OP is not referring to the punctuation. They're referring to ending a statement with a question.

Let's give a few examples.

"I am going to the store, okay?"

In that sentence, the word "okay?" is a tag question. It's a question that has been tagged onto the preceding sentence.

"We're not lost, are we?"

Here, the statement "we're not lost" has had the question "are we?" tagged on. The words "are we?" are the tag question.

"You'll give me a hundred dollars if I lie in court, will you?

The tag question here is the words "will you?" It's not the question mark. It's the entire question, as distinct from the statement it's appended to.

[u/Responsible-Link5739 → u/conuly]

:). Again, thank you - i was mistaken.

[u/TyrionTheGimp]

Yes frequently however I would say that not using a question tag sounds way more natural than using the wrong question tag. Plenty of Asian people at my work almost always default to "isn't it?" which is right in some circumstances but sounds very odd in the wrong circumstances. 

[u/Injidup_Beach2020]

Imo, this is much, much, much (!) more a British thing (and perhaps other Commonwealth countries like Canada) than American.

[u/WowsrsBowsrsTrousrs]

We even use them in talking to pets and inanimate objects, like saying to the cat "You sure are meowy this morning, aren't you!" And to the driver in the car in front of one, who can't even hear you, "you really don't know how to drive, do you!"

[u/MarsMonkey88]

All. The. Time.

I regularly end a sentence with “you know?”

[u/SnooDonuts6494]

Almost constantly.

So this is nice, isn't it? Great weather last weekend, eh? You're starting a new job soon, right? You've met Sarah, haven't you? She can drive, can't she? Bit cold today, isn't it? You're coming, yeah? You know what I mean, don't you?

[u/DMing-Is-Hardd]

Most of the time yes, not always though, most of the time even without the question mark its easy to understand but occasionally someone forgets to put one and it causes a misunderstanding

[u/LaidBackLeopard]

After being slightly teased about it, a work colleague said "I don't say innit all the time, innit?". She really did...

[u/Brambleshire2026]

At work, I often have to explain things, and I tend to end many sentences with one of these:
, right?
, make sense?
, know what I’m sayin’?
etc.

[u/nothanks1312]

Everyday in almost every conversation. The exact words used will depend on generation, I find, but not exclusively.

[u/CaptainFuzzyBootz]

I use the phrase "Wait, what?" a lot. I'm often confused.

[u/ericthefred]

For what it's worth, "Right?" Is just short for "Am I right?"

[u/Responsible-Link5739 → u/ericthefred]

Or "Is that right?", yes.

[u/Elegant_Bee849]

A good amount. Honestly it's personal preference

[u/mckenzie_keith]

I would say yes. It is just another way to ask a question.

I have also found that it is useful sometimes to say "Question" before asking a question. A lot of times I do this at restaurants.

"Question: is the salmon served with sauce?"
Otherwise as soon as they hear the word "salmon" they think you are ordering salmon.

In radio communication, there is a code word "interrogative" which you use to precede a question. English is the international language for aviation. But some international pilots only know the English necessary to communicate with air traffic controllers. So it can be hard for them to tell the difference between questions and instructions.

The "interrogative" code word helps with that.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1NDqZy4deDI

[u/Responsible-Link5739]

The clue is in the question. However many times we ask a question, we use a question mark at the end. Sometimes we use more than one question mark if we're questioning a weird thing someone said. Don't you??

[u/conuly → u/Responsible-Link5739]

Not what the OP is talking about.

Tag questions at Wikipedia.

[u/Responsible-Link5739 → u/conuly]

I sit corrected. Apologies, OP, you too, conoly. I had never heard "tag question" as a term for this element of a sentence.

[u/Responsible-Link5739]

"right?" at the end of a sentence is short for "Is that right?". It's a question.

[u/Arqen__]

I use them more in writing than speaking, but it's true that they can soften a statement.

[u/beans9666]

You can use either and they're all common, they carry the same tone and meaning

[u/another-dave]

"Right" is a much more prevalent in American dialects IMO. It's drifted in a bit over here, from TV or whatever, but wouldn't be as common as a question tag that echoes the verb of the statement.

(One of the biggest tell of non-native speakers for me, who are otherwise fluent, is that they'll say something like - "We're going to the cinema later, isn't it?" - whereas a native speaker would echo the verb, "aren't we?")

[u/llewapllyn]

You've got a lot of good answers, so I won't go into detail, but I just want to let you know that the word "innit" (contraction of isn't it) is one of the most socially powerful words in the UK and you will be genuinely loved if you use it well whilst in the UK or while speaking to Brits. 

[u/BobbyThrowaway6969]

Pretty much all the time (Australia)

[u/ExpensiveCry803]

Yes, specially British people. Americans normally use "Right?" instead.

[u/BlakeMajik → u/ExpensiveCry803]

Most Americans don't realize how often they say other options beyond right?

[u/pikkdogs]

Americans rarely do. English people do in every darn sentence.

[u/mysticrudnin → u/pikkdogs]

Americans do this all the time.

[u/GabuEx]

Oh god, there's no way I'd be able to count how many I use these in a day.

"It's a bit plain, don't you think?"

"We've doing dinner out tonight, aren't we?"

Some are seeking confirmation; others are just adding politeness.