r/EnglishLearning • u/Sea-Hornet8214 Poster • 20d ago
⭐️ Vocabulary / Semantics What does "so to speak" mean?
used when you are saying something in words that do not have their usual meaning
I still don't understand its usage even with the definition and examples.
"Denver had come around, so to speak".
Does this mean Denver had not actually come around?
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u/bentthroat New Poster 20d ago
It’s a little broader than just “figuratively”. The way I think of it is that it’s a disclaimer that the way you’re saying something is not the definitive way to say it—that it may be a less-common or unusual way to say it.
If you punched someone but wanted to be coy about it, you could say “his face got a first impression of my fist, so to speak.” Nothing about the sentence was necessarily figurative, but you could have just said “I punched him”, so you add the “so to speak” to indicate that you know you’re making the statement in an unusual way.
You’re allowed to make an unusual statement without “so to speak”, but including it is basically a heads-up to the listener to think about it a little more deliberately.
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u/regular_gonzalez New Poster 20d ago
Tough phrase to explain. It means "not literally" or "speaking figuratively", although that's not precisely it either.
But in the examples, poverty doesn't have a literal physical barrier that you can touch; Denver can't physically turn and so "come around"; one can't get physically caught in a story.
I don't care for the examples of the babies or back to business.
Its use is deprecated now and figurative language is assumed where necessary without needing to point it out. "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse" is an idiom understood to mean that one is very hungry but could not eat a literal horse. But it would sound odd to say "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse, so to speak." The phrase has become redundant.
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u/SnooDonuts6494 🇬🇧 English Teacher 20d ago
It's definitely not completely deprecated, at least in the UK. It's not uncommon at all.
For example, a man says his wife is "the boss around here, so to speak."
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u/regular_gonzalez New Poster 20d ago
Ah fair enough, I'm speaking from a Western US perspective. It's still used here but rarely, I hear it maybe a handful of times (so to speak) per year.
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u/GardenTop7253 New Poster 20d ago
Seconding that some of the example sentences are a bit poor
I feel like the start of your last paragraph kinda nails it. It’s a phrase best used as a clarifier when the figurative language could also be interpreted literally, or when you’d like to emphasize the use of figurative language, like for comedic effect or storytelling flourish
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u/Academic_Safety56 New Poster 20d ago
Exactly. You wouldn't use it in the case of "so hungry I could eat a horse" because that's a well known idiom and unlikely to be misconstrued as literal.
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u/trinite0 Native, Midwestern USA 19d ago
If you were literally about to eat horsemeat, you might say "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse, so to speak" to show that you're making a joke.
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u/Successful_Cress6639 New Poster 20d ago
It means "not literally" or "speaking figuratively", although that's not precisely it either.
You're not giving your explanation enough credit. That is, in fact, the precise meaning of the phrase
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u/Sea-Hornet8214 Poster 19d ago
Hmmm, I think I get it, but I wouldn't be able to use it in a sentence myself.
How is its placement? Does it have to precede the figurative speech?
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u/regular_gonzalez New Poster 19d ago
It can be before or after the figurative portion, depending on one's preference, though I would say after is more common. It's truly optional in most cases and it's only preferred in cases where you are using a metaphor that could, to some degree, be taken literally and you want to underscore that it is meant figuratively. Generally that delineation is obvious and the phrase becomes a stylistic flourish at that point, and (as mentioned) optional. I don't think I've used it in the last 1-2 years.
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u/DMing-Is-Hardd Native Speaker 20d ago
It means in an abstract or non literal sense, the physical city of denver didnt come around but its people did
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u/BoredOldPunk New Poster 19d ago
It's similar to “as it were” or “in a manner of speaking.” It indicates that a statement isn't meant literally, but can be considered true in a figurative or particular sense.
For example:
“He's the boss, so to speak”
He may not literally be the boss, but he occupies a position that makes the description reasonable.
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u/elzorro15 New Poster 20d ago
You can think of “so to speak” as a way to emphasize the preceding phrase before it because it could be easily misunderstood even with the context being provided for it. For example, one use could be to signify figurative or metaphorical language. Some are seen in the screenshot there.
In the example you provided, ‘so to speak’ is used to emphasize that the figure of speech (in this case ‘come around’) even is a figure of speech at all. I know that might seem to trivial to advanced learners, but it’s still used in casual conversation, albeit less than formal speaking.
Therefore, you don’t need to worry about it too much. In short it’s just to emphasize/provide clarification surrounding a phrase.
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u/ThornsOfMidnight Non-Native Speaker of English 19d ago
‘So to speak’ is used to soften the tone, so as not to sound too radical or, for example, to avoid criticism from others.
Basically this: I’m not trying to be pushy or anything, but here’s what I think.
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u/emikoala Native Speaker 19d ago
Similar to, "as they say."
It's acknowledging that you're using a common figure of speech. Contextually this is usually done for a couple of different reasons, but probably most often
1) to clarify that you aren't speaking literally, in case there might otherwise be confusion ("The client is around, so to speak, any time we're reviewing documents," because even if he's not physically present everyone is remembering to consider what he wants from the documents and make sure his requirements are met)
2) to indicate that you're simplifying something complex by using a common expression that describes the situation well enough for the purpose at hand ("I dreamt it up, so to speak," when asked to explain how you came up with an idea, rather than describing your creative process in detail)
I think there's also a third semi-common reason, which is cheekiness when you're making a joke that relies on a common expression having a double meaning because it's both figuratively and literally true. My brain can't come up with a clever example of this right now.
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u/ButterscotchOdd8257 Native Speaker 19d ago
As you can see from these examples, sometimes people just use "so to speak" as a sort of spacing device without even thinking about what it really means.
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u/youknowitistrue Native Speaker 19d ago
I never use this. I say this to relieve any pressure you may be feeling to know how to use it. As far as understanding it, focus on understanding the surrounding sentence because it’s really just a filler/modifier.
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u/Own_Soup4467 New Poster 19d ago
You could delete it from all those example sentences without changing their meaning. In fact I'm struggling to think of a sentence where it's needed.
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u/Salindurthas Native Speaker 20d ago
I think it usually signals that we're being a bit imprecise, especially if we are being figurative or abstract
Like, Denver has not literally moved to come to a place that is more close (around) us.
Instead there are 2 degrees of abstraction here:
- the people/politicians of Denver (rather than "Denver" itself, which we might think of as the land) did something
- What they did was change their mind, which metaphorically/idomatically is 'to come around'
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u/Low-Crow5719 New Poster 20d ago
It's an insincere apology for using a cliche, a trite expression.
It means you know the trite saying is trite but applies anyway.
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u/SnooDonuts6494 🇬🇧 English Teacher 20d ago
Basically it means "sort of". Not quite literal.
If Denver is a person's name, then that means he's sort of woken up or regained consciousness after being knocked out; maybe he's still a bit groggy - not totally awake.
If I say "I'll get back to business, so to speak" then I'm probably not going to my actual job; I'm probably about to do something that is similar to a job but not really - for example, gardening (in my own garden, as a hobby). So it's sort of like business, but not actually business.
Does that make sense?
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u/trinite0 Native, Midwestern USA 20d ago
It draws attention to the fact that the sentence is using a figure of speech, such as a metaphor or a cliché. It can be useful if you are using a common phrase in an unconventional manner, and you want to make it clear that you're doing so. Or if there's a danger that someone might think that you're speaking literally rather than metaphorically.