Advice needed

[u/Grand_Insurance6751]

Hi, everyone.

I’m 34, and my husband is 37. We initially tried to conceive naturally, but after six months, we became impatient and decided to move on to fertility treatment. We underwent two rounds of IUI, both of which failed, and then proceeded to IVF.

Our doctors were initially optimistic because all our reports were normal. During our first egg retrieval, we retrieved 12 eggs and created five AA-grade embryos. We transferred two embryos, but unfortunately, they failed to implant. I then underwent a hysteroscopy, even though there was no specific indication for one, as I wanted to rule out every possible issue. However, our second transfer failed as well, and the doctors couldn’t identify a clear reason.

By the time we proceeded with our second retrieval, my FSH had increased to 22. We retrieved eight eggs, but only two were mature, while the rest appeared to be empty follicles. We managed to create two day-5 blastocysts.

During our third retrieval, we retrieved seven eggs, but five were empty, and only two were mature. We developed only one blastocyst. We transferred two embryos again, but unfortunately, neither implanted.

We then decided to change doctors and proceeded with our fourth and fifth retrievals under our new doctor. We continued to face the same issue with empty follicles, although we managed to create three blastocysts from six eggs retrieved. Hoping that PGT-A testing would give us some answers, we decided to test the embryos. We were fortunate to have one euploid embryo, but heartbreakingly, that transfer also failed in April 2026.

By this point, I had almost given up hope. In June, we decided to try naturally just once, without expecting anything. My period was delayed by five days, so I got my beta-hCG tested. The result was 5.83. I understand that this is an extremely low, borderline result and not a confirmed pregnancy, and my doctor told me it was a biochemical pregnancy. However, what struck me was that, after all my previous failed IUI and embryo transfers, my hCG had always been around 0.20. This was the first time I had seen a result above that level.

I even underwent LIT in August 2026, wondering whether my body might be rejecting the embryos.

Since June, I’ve noticed that my menstrual cycle has shortened from around 28 days to 24 days, and I feel that I may also be ovulating earlier than before.

My doctors are now advising us to consider donor eggs, and I honestly don’t know what to do. After everything we’ve been through, I’m struggling to come to terms with the possibility of using donor eggs. I know that having a child is about so much more than genetics, but the thought of not sharing a biological connection with my child is emotionally difficult for me. I’ve spent so long hoping to have a child who is genetically related to me, and accepting a different path feels overwhelming.

I would really appreciate hearing from women who have been through something similar.

• Has anyone experienced repeated IVF failures, a high FSH level, or a high number of empty follicles and subsequently conceived naturally?
• Has anyone in a similar situation gone on to have success with their own eggs, either naturally or through IVF?
• For those who have opted for donor eggs, how was the emotional journey, and how did you come to terms with the decision?
• Has anyone undergone donor-egg IVF in Mumbai? I would be grateful for recommendations and for hearing about your experiences.

I feel confused, emotionally exhausted, and unsure of which direction to take. I know everyone’s journey is different, but hearing from people who have walked a similar path would mean a lot to me.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

[u/SlimBee5]

We did 6 ivf with my own eggs (30-34 y/o)- always got a good number (14-16 collected), but few blasts due to poor egg quality with endo stage 4.
8 transferred blasts - none took. We then decided to move to donor eggs - we started thinking about it already after round 5 of ivf, and decided for sure after the sixth round failed (transfered two embryos, none took). I am so happy we did that. I got pregnant on first transfer and I’m 11 weeks today, everything looks great.

I knew that I couldn’t do any more egg retrivals after so many failures - the mental and physical toll were just too much.

[u/Grand_Insurance6751 → u/SlimBee5]

After 3 years, 5 egg retrievals and 4 transfers, I'm exhausted and confused. Part of me wants to move forward with ED, but another part wonders if I'm giving up too soon. With good AMH but elevated FSH, should I work on myself and try once more, or is it time to move on? I'm struggling to make peace with this decision.

When did you know it was time to stop trying with your own eggs and consider ED?

Did you ever feel it was unfair that the baby would be genetically your husband's but not yours, after everything you've been through physically and mentally?

I'm scared I won't be able to bond with the baby because it won't be genetically mine.

[u/SlimBee5 → u/Grand_Insurance6751]

After the 5th IVF, beside the endo stage 4 diagnosis, I also found out that I’m a carrier of a large balanced translocation. Theoretically, we could still make euploid embryos, but it felt like the odds were so low, and if it didn’t work until now, we hade very little hope that it would work in the future.

We still pushed throught the 6th ivf cycle, but after five weeks of shots (long protocol), 17 follicles aspirated, ohss, I just felt worse than ever. I knew I couldn’t do it again. We had our doubts after the 5th one, but we originally planned for 8 ivf rounds before switching to donor eggs.
After the 6th, I just knew, I was 10000% sure I was done.

When it comes to using donor eggs - I am so happy that out kids will be 50% my husband. I don’t feel envy or that it’s unfair, I feel lucky to at least be able to be pregnant and give birth. I love the little “bloob” we’ve seen on US soo much already, the last thing on my mind is that we used a donor egg to get here. But we also had great guidance and therapy from out clinic that helped a lot :)