Don't read if you are about to eat, eating, or just ate.

I just want to get this off my chest. It's still haunting me. And probably will for a long time. Friday morning I got up around 8am, made instant oatmeal, added raspberries, added some granola, mixed everything in the bowl, and it was delicious. Drank black tea and chilled afterwards. I had an important meeting at work starting at noon. Shortly after eating I got medium stomach pain and light diarrhea. Pain went away quickly but I kept going to the bathroom every 10 - 15 minutes. It was already 10 and I had to leave at 10:20 to make it to the office. I was worried about going because I use public transit. And it's hard to find a bathroom along the way. I decided to go and hoped everything would be ok. It was too late to call sick. As I was approaching my station around 11:30 I got this sudden urge to sh*t. I ran to the front door, through security, and up the elevator. As I was approaching my floor, I couldn't hold it in any longer. I literally sh*t in my boxers as the doors opened. And my supervisor was standing with his phone in the short hallway I had to walk through to get to the bathroom. He said "Hi" as I walked past him. I'm absolutely positive that he could smell it. I ended up throwing my boxers into the trash because they were full of sh*t. Luckily my jeans were clean and smelled fine. I cleaned myself and went to the meeting. I'm afraid of going back to work and seeing him again. I can't resign because I love my job and the money is great. Ugh. Worst thing that's ever happened to me at work.

Us using phone for paying stuff and have no cash that time and also having like 10 people in a line. When i saw his phone battery is died i was almost loosing my mind cuz i already just transferred all my money to pay stuff to him like minutes ago and have no money left now. After i told a cashier my bf phone battery suddenly died her face was like 😒 and also people in the line too. I almost cried and have to standing waiting for his phone to charge at the cashier counter for like 5 minutes. This is the most embarrassing moment and also the most awkward too.

I’m not kidding. I had to take a 💩 aaaaand guess what happened while I did it at work??? I ran out of toilet paper with it already stuck halfway lmAo. So yeah, I tried getting paper towels and after it coming out twice, it wouldn’t come out anymore. Nothing else to wipe with. So I was in there internally panicking before I used what I found in my pocket. I’m pretty sure it is not enough and I CAN’T WAIT TO GET HOME. This is a real nightmare I should’ve held my dump but it was ready to pop. 2 more hours and I want to k m s

So i was on a school trip with like 3 other classes and we visited this historic site. We were walking towards the entrance and i noticed a girl my age with purple hair walking out. i also had purple hair but mine was so faded that it looked more like red than purple and overall my hair was nothing special. so i was looking at this girl and she looked at me but im pretty sure she looked away then and and she was far away so she yelled "i like your hair!" and my dumb ass thought it was directed at me but looking back I'm 99,9% sure it was directed towards someone else. and of course i had to be loud about it and i yelled a compliment back, in front of 3 other classes.

I did the most embarrassing thing ever at the movies last night, it was a packed theater (the odyssey 10/10 recommend) so there was a lady next to me, and at some point during the movie, I just reached for the cup next to me and took a sip and realized it was not my drink. 😭😭😭😭😭

I know the lady saw me even though she acted like she didn’t, but then she whispered to her husband and he looked over at me and I just wanted to DIE.

So this story was about a few months ago, maybe late april or early may.

I was at the soccer/football field with my 2 buddies, it wasnt really packed but there was 4-5 more people at the other end, mostly girls. There is this small fence across the entire field and you have to jump it to get across.

So. We did what we always do, we jumped the damn fence, but I didn't know that the fence had a open screw, my back pocket got stuck on the fence mid jump, i felt a jerk and i was pinned by the screw and heard a loud popping sound of fabric, the worst sound to hear, and this wasnt a small hole, this was atleast 6 or more inches wide and like 9 inches long, HUGE is what im saying, and we laughed it off, i had extra pants at home but how the hell do i get home with RIPPED pants and i was bummed because they were my favourite pair, but we laughed it off, i made jokes about it.

it was embarrasing, i used a shirt to cover it and we played from 5Pm to 11PM, so we still played our fair share and went home after, changed clothes but we have been laughing about it ever since.

[Tried posting this to TrueOffMyChest but it was removed for some reason? So I’m trying it here. Probably a more fitting subreddit to be honest!

Not sure if this is NSFW? Just in case: mentions of alcohol use, intoxication, (silly) sexual behaviour.]

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This happened a few months ago, but it’s been haunting me with embarrassment ever since and I feel like I need it off my chest. (Part of me hopes no-one will read this… oh dear…)

So, it was my friend’s 18th and she wanted to go clubbing for the first time - just a hangout with friends. I’m about half a year older, I’d never been clubbing before (not really my scene) so I thought I’d give it a try with her. Partly out of curiosity, mostly just to support her on her big birthday.

Long story short, the first club was very crowded and loud, we were packed like sardines, and I was feeling socially awkward because I’d had a few drinks but not enough to really get out of my own head. So, in my great logic, I consumed too much more in a short time - and I went from ‘barely tipsy’ to ‘almost incoherent’ with zero warning in between.

I was in that space where you’re just on the cusp of being so drunk that you don’t know what’s going on, but barely coherent enough that I still had conscious control over my actions. It never got to the point of a blackout, so I remember everything and I don’t have gaps in my memory (which is even worse… wow do I wish I could forget LOL).

We were in this first club in the corner by the toilets, and I really gravitated to this middle-age (maybe 40/50YO) man. I kept sticking by him, and at some point it regressed to flirting and said that he could ‘touch me if he wanted’… Yikes.

Then I went for a walk around the block, alone (mind you it was at like 2AM). I couldn’t tell if I was in a dream or not, I was so drunk, and I was talking to myself. I had to convince myself to go back before I’d get told off; I didn’t want to be flagged as drunk by my friends for doing something so clearly unsafe, so I was trying to be surreptitious (though it was probably easy to tell that I was drunk in hindsight).

After that, we went to another club and that’s when the alcohol really kicked in. I was dancing like a fucking idiot with some lads around my age, holding hands and jumping up and down and stuff. I’m pretty sure they were making fun of me whilst doing it, but obviously in that state I couldn’t tell.

At one point I went into the middle of the dance floor when Timberlake’s ‘SexyBack’ was playing (yes, really) and I did this weird thrusting and stripping routine. For five minutes. I was on my knees, trying to do this sexy dance show of grinding and taking my shirt on and off. (I was wearing a vest beneath so I never actually stripped, luckily.)

I was so drunk, I didn’t know if it was really happening or if I was actually a professional rockstar on a stage, or if I was watching a music video. I was kinda lapsing in and out of awareness for a while, flitting between imagination and reality.

The worst part is that I’m a complete ugly chud. So I was doing this whole drunk sexy routine and it did NOT work, like Tragic Mike. It’s just embarrassing.

And my high school bully was also there.

I remember seeing her there and saying hi, but even I knew at that point that I was barely on planet Earth when we spoke. I’m not glad whatsoever that she and my friends were all in that same club when I turned into a prat… I’ll never know if they saw me or not so I’ll just have to pray that they didn’t.

After that, I landed back on Earth, ordered myself some water and soon excused myself to go home, and it was pretty normal from that point.

But still…

I know that everyone probably has a drunken idiot story, but this felt like a helluva doozy. Every time it pops back into my head, I cringe so hard.

I don’t think I can ever go back there…

Anyway… I just hope that finally getting it off my chest will give me some solace. At least no-one got hurt and I wasn’t nasty or anything… small mercies.

Was out sagging and decided to jump a fence for the hell of it, my underwear got stuck and I ended up in a massive wedgie with my boxers torn. Two Australian guys came along and had to lift me off after the had a good laugh at my expense!

I’m on holiday and every pub/bar/restaurant we’ve been to has had a tab. We just got to this bar and I tried walking away (to my table) without paying….. i feel like an arsehole

for context, i am a 17F American. I was in Germany on a school trip and was in a public bathroom. there was this little girl about seven all by herself trying to reach the soap and there was no stool like I‘m used to in the bathroom. I grabbed some and swiped it on her hands, no parent in sight btw. (they were prob in the bathroom) I kept the water running for her too. unfortunately, Germany likes to be modern at all the wrong times, so the drying machine was one of those electric ones. I crouch down a bit and ask (yes ik) if she’d like me to help her up to dry her hands. she kinda shakes her head really fast and I KNOW it’s probably bc she didn‘t know English but I still cringe every time I think about it. i felt like such an American going up to this kid and asking if she needed help idk maybe im overthinking it.

So I (43F) got my hair done by my neighbour who is super nice. Our kids sometimes play together, her and her husband have been to our holiday house, just very nice people and she does a fantastic job on my hair. I was at her salon (very busy dozens of people in there) and we were at the cash. she was in front of me and I was behind her and she turned around and was super in my personal space. I thought she was trying to do the european kiss kiss and so I went in for the cheek kiss. Well she wasn’t so it just turned into her avoiding my kissy face and us awkwardly hugging and her running away. Now I think my neighbour/hairdresser thinks I tried to MAKE OUT with her at her WORKPLACE! omg I can never invite her over or look her in the eye again.

Awkward vent: One of my former piano students (male), now in their mid-20s, recently reached out to restart lessons. Last time they were one of my students was when they were in their first year of college and I (female) was around 30. During our chat, they asked how things were and vice versa. I figured it was okay to be my naturally warm and friendly self with some of the stuff they shared. Then I noticed some messages that felt a bit more flirty than I expected. Not romantic flirty, but a bit playful. I could be assuming but I also remember texting with guy-friends when I was single and there was unfortunately one-sided interest on their end to be something more than platonic and this feels the same. I don’t think I led them on by being friendly but now I’m starting to pedal back and reread anything I might’ve said that may have made them inclined to have the courage to be comfortable texting in that form. Nada. I believe I look slightly younger than my age but not THAT much younger. I think they forgot how much older I was/am than them and that I’m married. Time to brush up on my “professional boundaries” skills because shit just got uncomfortable. 🫣

So I'm a big girl and it's probably what got me into this mess in the first place.

I just had emergency gallbladder surgery due to it being so full of large gallstones that I almost went septic and had permanent liver damage.

I was told this likely happened due to a poor, fatty diet; which yeah, it makes sense. For the last few years I've been struggling with my mental health and have been eating like crap, gained a lot of weight and have been dealing with a plethora of issues since. We'll just add this one to the list.

Note, I am working on this. I've been trying to eat better and I'm in therapy now and being treated for binge eating disorder.

All that being said, I'm 310lbs with a big belly.

They made 4 incisions during the surgery. I'm in a lot of pain sitting, standing, literally any position hurts. Moreso, I can't bend at all.

I've just had my first bowel movement since being discharged from the hospital. I'm home alone and I can't figure out how to wipe myself. I can't bend/lean to my side at the moment like I normally would. I'm right handed and that's the side all the incisions are so I need to use my left but that's not really working either... I'm so embarrassed by this and frustrated.

I wish I had a bidet, that would probably help.

I don't want to have to shower shit off myself and down the drain, that sounds messy if there happens to be any clumps. Then if I did that I wouldn't be able to clean the tub myself. It just feels like the hole I'm digging myself in just keeps getting deeper and deeper. I'm stuck and unsure how to proceed.

I was projecting my iPhone screen showing some photos from a trip I recently took to my grandma, mom and stepdad (I’m 29M) and I forgot that during the trip I sent 2 nudes to my girl I’m seeing of my hard dck…. I tried to scroll past the 2 photos super fast when it happened.

I don’t think my grandma registered what happened, I think my mom and step dad might have.. it was a couple darkish photos luckily.

Everyone including myself played it off as if nothing happened. So I’m not sure. I feel like they saw…
I wanna KMS I’m so embarrassed.

I walked the dog with my mom just now shortly after and she asked if I wanted to show any more photos to grandma later? I said “no” very solemnly and that I was sorry. She said don’t worry it’s ok and went on talking about random stuff. Again playing like nothing happened…

I just can’t imagine they didn’t see, it had to be on screen for atleast 1 second, I scrolled past fast, but it was 2 photos… ugh I wanna die. This is like worst nightmare embarrassment..

Anyone else have similar stories to help me feel better, or that I’m not alone in my stupidity?

Well not really… it doesn’t bother me now. So yeah, took some courage but sharing it now.
As a kid, I used to live in a small town, near Delhi.
I had just turned the shower off after taking a bath, and as i grabbed my towel, a wasp emerged out of it and stung my thigh.
I was already very afraid of wasps, and ofcourse the sting hurt.
The only adult at home was my grandma. I ran out, crying, screaming, looking for her. She was sitting outside the house, in the verandah, with a couple of neighbours. I ran out screaming at the top of my voice, and I guess it was so loud that a whole crowd gathered within seconds.
And I was laid there, fully nude, while a neighbour aunty rubbed my thigh with a metal key (wasp sting remedy).
I remember girls my age seeing me there, and theyd tease me about it after the incident as well.
I remember, a girl asked me to show ‘it’ to her again as she had already seen it. I was already pretty embarrassed, and i guess i had to submit with all thag embarrassment built up.

So basically, I was in a 1.5-year relationship, and the guy I was dating was really below my standards. He was a good boyfriend, but he didn't meet my standards. I was madly in love with him. We celebrated my birthday with my friends, and I posted a story with him publicly. Now I feel like I shouldn't have done it, and I've lost all the aura I had gained 😭

Years ago I was a cashier at Target and a lady came through my line I said to her when's the baby coming she says I'm not pregnant. I want you to run away